nasty old man next door :-(

Mojisola

pimento wrote: »

There's nothing to stop you putting up a six foot fence (which is normally the maximum height allowed without planning permission) and adding some trellis to the top making it an eight foot fence.
Just have it erected an inch inside your boundary and there will be nothing he can do about it.

Two metres is the maximum and you can't add trellis on top of that without getting planning permission.

Don't give the neighbour a genuine reason to get at you. While his complaints are all spurious, you've got the moral high ground.

thorsoak

adouglasmhor wrote: »

Jenkins is that you?

He can't (h)ear you!

ska_lover

krazyburd23 wrote: »

I was confused with your comment about your TV channel, has your neighbour had a problem with that? If so, it sounds the same with the problem of spying into the windows, it’s so horrible to feel like you’re being watched all of the time . It’s .

Yes he does watch us, makes me feel very uneasy. The TV channel comment was the final straw for me. But, same as you - I am trying to not let it get to me too much.

The last time he knocked, I told him he wasnt welcome to knock our door again, and said goodbye and shut the door and left him stood there. He hasn't knocked since, which was nearly a fortnight ago now, which is the longest he has left us alone for. If he does knock again I won't even let him tell me what he wants, I will just tell him to get off of our property as firmly as I dare to, without being rude

I hate being like this though, like I said before, where we lived previously we had good neighbourly people who would take in a parcel etc for you - have never been in a situation like this before - it does feel like he is being deliberately awful

Things were getting so bad by that point that he was knocking on the door to complain multiple times per day - sometimes waiting in our front garden when I got home from work. Always petty things like 'Why do you have to hoover your house on a saturday afternoon', 'do you have to have to decorate during the weekend, have you nothing better to do?', ' why are you always washing at the weekend - I want peace and quiet I don't want to see you outside pegging your washing out' .....Well yes, we do, as we both work full time.

We are hardly there during the week - both of us work all week, and the least our days are 12 hour shifts, often far longer - yet he was still finding things to mither about - to wait on our doorstep for when we get home after a long day

He has no control over me or my household and I shall tell him so, too.

I think he is just bored with his life to be honest, and seems lonely as has no apparent family or a single visitor that I have ever seen. Hope I dont get like that when i get old, and just let people live their lives without being so bitter and nasty!

red_devil

Sounds like he needs to get a life.

picklekin

Erk, I really sympathise with you OP, and I think you are being very kind in your approach.

I once lived next door to an elderly man, he used to sit in the front garden in his pants. I was very nice to him as he seemed very lonely, and although we got on at first then he suddenly turned very nasty and accused me of stealing his pension book! We had a garden that wasn't really divided as it had an access way through it, in the end I hardly went out into it because he'd come out (again, just in pants!) and start shouting nonsensical things at me, I wish in hindsight I'd called the council (to get him help if nothing else) but I was 17 and living on my own for the first time so I just hid from him! I hope you manage to stand up to him and enjoy your home you've worked so hard for.

krazyburd23

Great idea icey77 ;=)

Ska lover – I am so sorry, your situation sounds awful, surely its bordering on harassment? :=( Glad he has left you alone for a couple of weeks now.

I’m the same as you, I really don’t like being the way I am, but unfortunately needs must. We came from a small block of flats, we shared a hallway/stairs with our neighbours so we were very used to being in close proximity to others. Everyone was nice and friendly and got along just fine. I like to think I am a good neighbour so when I’m faced with someone like him it makes me sad.

When I was talking to the fencer neighbour yesterday I didn’t get into back biting, just mentioned we had a few issues with privacy and interference I’d like to just block out and hopefully nip in the bud. He told me that my neighbour has always been weird – apparently he used to just walk down the side of their house into their back garden!!! (they have a big gate now haha). They moved in a long time ago, so he has definitely been like it for some time.

You’re right about the boredom factor, they actually have nothing better to do that stick their beaks in!! They are just so nosey and just unable to except that people do things differently to them. One time when mine knocked on the door, I had to move the draught excluder out the way so it took a bit longer than usual he said to ‘me, what you doing, you naked in there!!’ :eek:Whhhhhhyyyyyyyyyyyyyy???

I don’t think mine is as lonely as yours, he still has his wife who he says he looks after, (I used to feel sorry for her as I heard him shouting at her a few times but after she had a pop at my mum, I stopped sympathising). He does get the odd visitor but I think he’d get a lot more if he stopped being so horrible.

Icey77

ska_lover wrote: »

, why are you always washing at the weekend - I want peace and quiet I don't want to see you outside pegging your washing out' .....

Oh my goodness, now I'd be tempted to buy the most garish, hideous, Anne Summers style crotchless panties I could and peg them all out for him to get twitchy about :rotfl::rotfl:

The mind boggles as to what else I could peg out on my washing line

MrsAtobe

Icey77 wrote: »

Oh my goodness, now I'd be tempted to buy the most garish, hideous, Anne Summers style crotchless panties I could and peg them all out for him to get twitchy about :rotfl::rotfl:

The mind boggles as to what else I could peg out on my washing line

Or even answer the door wearing them and a tasselled bra!

Sorry OP, I really do feel for you, we had horrible neighbours, who would also come into our garden and cut back plants, the six foot fence with plastic spikes on the top was finally what stopped them, but someone else has already suggested that. Hope you can get the fence up soon, and get some peace of mind back, I do understand how unnerving it is to see people in your back garden.

goonarmy

jellyhead wrote: »

I know it's not illegal to park outside a person's house, but I do think it's sometimes ill-mannered.

Cant park outsde your house? Tough.
Get a driveway.

missprice

ska_lover wrote: »

Things were getting so bad by that point that he was knocking on the door to complain multiple times per day - sometimes waiting in our front garden when I got home from work. Always petty things like 'Why do you have to hoover your house on a saturday afternoon', 'do you have to have to decorate during the weekend, have you nothing better to do?', ' why are you always washing at the weekend - I want peace and quiet I don't want to see you outside pegging your washing out' .....Well yes, we do, as we both work full time.

Make yourself a list of replies. Don't have to be really nasty or swear just give an answer from your list.

examples

I don't want to see you outside pegging washin/washing the car blah.
Answer so don't look then

Why do you hoover on a sat aft
Answer cos the carpet needs it then.

Why decorate on a weekend
Answer because I like to.

Other answers

Who made you into my mother
Why do you care what I do and when
If it really upsets you don't look outside/open your door/listen.

Am sure you can think of more.

Only to be used on a rinse and repeat basis, or the broken record method.