Who should pay for bridesmaids dresses?

snow_ball

So you still don't get any say in the dress you're expected to buy (long and pink, is that your taste?!) and she's already bought matching accessories to go with said dress?

I think it's time to resign as bridesmaid. Honestly, this is not how a friend behaves.

jetplane

Well she has more neck than a giraffe, imagine spending that much on a wedding and having your bridesmaids dressed in whatever their idea of long and pink is? Could this be revenge of the bridesmaids :rotfl:

inklove

It's better than the frilly baby pink dress we were supposed to be wearing.
And I can definitely spend a more reasonable amount.

I missed a part out though, it has to be long, pale pink and strapless.

I have found a pale pink maxi style dress on eBay for £24.

jetplane

Many years ago I wore a shiny pink frilly bridesmaid dress for one of my best friends. I was early 20's and it really was just a bigger version of the little bridesmaid who was her daughter. I was all boobs and hair and it did me no favours... but she paid for mine and my husbands travel, meals and accommodation and we were driven everywhere in a Rolls Royce for the weekend so I forgave her :rotfl:

celticcurl

Before you buy anything confirm with her that you are not expected to pay for anything else - hair/makeup/shoes etc.

Although personally I still wouldn't agree to pay for a dress at this short notice and when she's still being so specific - Is this a dress you would choose normally?

floss2

inklove wrote: »

It's better than the frilly baby pink dress we were supposed to be wearing.
And I can definitely spend a more reasonable amount.

I missed a part out though, it has to be long, pale pink and strapless.

I have found a pale pink maxi style dress on eBay for £24.

Would you wear it again? Is it flattering - i.e. the right shade of pink to suit YOU (not the bride )

Ms_Chocaholic

Just a thought about the original bridesmaids dresses though, were these ordered specially, ie you were all measured. She may find it not as easy as she thinks to cancel that order.

When_the_going_gets_tough

Inklove, we all have different takes on this but it is your friend. I think what you do next depends rather on how you now feel about your friend. Probably you have the choice of pulling out of being a bridesmaid or paying for your own dress. I would make it very clear that you will not be paying anything else out. It's fair enough if a bride sets out what she can/cannot afford to pay for right at the beginning. Also it's not necessary to have expensive make up and hair dos or even new shoes but this all needs to be sorted out right at the start. Then everyone knows where they stand and bridesmaids can withdraw gracefully if they are not happy.

*Louise*

Glad I read all of this and found out what happened at the end (although it sounds like there is more to come) not much more I could add to say she does sound really cheeky.

I'm still in shock at the cost of one night in a hotel for a friend's wedding...I would want the honeymoon suite for that price

Going by the room prices, the wedding must be costing a fair bit....I Don't think scrimping on the bridesmaids costs is the best thing to do.

inklove

It isn't sorted after all, I received a reply to my last message.

"We are sorry that you seem to be unhappy with things. The couple or their family paying for everything is rather an archaic tradition, it's now far more common for people to pay for their own clothes for the wedding. As you agreed to be part of our wedding we assumed you were ok with any expenses that it involved when you accepted our invitation to be a bridesmaid. If you were unhappy with the dress you should have really said something before it was ordered."

So it appears the original dress is still in play, I'm not really sure what's going on now.