New Freemason wife

Persimmon_2

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ariba10

There will be social events such as Ladies Evenings and other gatherings and you will find new friends with other masons wives and families.

It will be very unusual if you do not find it enjoyable in a very short time.

tanith

I think you need to concentrate on yourself and let your husband enjoy his new 'hobby', find something of your own to concentrate on instead of feeling 'left behind'.
My OH has a few hobbies that he loves and they change with the seasons so he is always off on some jaunt or other be it bowls, snooker, fishing or golf , and then we enjoy the time when we are both home and he tells me all about his time out of the house and vice versa. Its good to have hobbies/friends that you don't share as it gives you lots to chat over when you are together.

fluffnutter

Persimmon wrote: »

It is a decision I have fully supported him in and I have encouraged him in.

This was your first mistake. Not surprised you're feeling rubbish. If my husband wanted to join some silly little boys' club to compensate for the fact that he never got enough badges in the boy scouts I'd be pretty horrified too. Couldn't he have taken up golf instead??

fluffnutter

Don't the freemasons have some female branch? Join that OP and do your own secretive thing. Or maybe get a personal trainer, get your hair streaked and hint that you're having an affair with 'Julio' ('he's got wonderful thighs, darling, and he's so masterful on the cross-trainer').

DigForVictory

The best revenge is a life well lived - so come & join Scouts, where the badges are a much more important when you're only 6 (& upwards!) and you'll have an even wider network of friends!

There's anecdotal research that indicates scout leaders tend to achieve astonishing longevity (possibly wondering what the young 'uns will do next, but they share the energy & do keep you fully occupied!)

You can *also* be a Freemason wife, but come & give Scouting a go?!

Watto30

Hi Op

Sorry to hear your currently battling with your emotions over this, I am just about to go through the same thing with my partner so you are not alone. You sound like you and you husband have a really solid relationship and he probably really appreciates you fully supporting him on this.

Realistically how much time will he have to dedicate to it? it might be different in the different lodges but my oh will have to go to a meeting one weeknight every 2 weeks then a few saturdays throughout the year so timewise at the moment its not about to take up a huge chunk of our time that we would have spent doing things together

My father has been a freemason for over 20 years and brother is now one and my oh about to do the same so I have grown up with freemasonry in the family.

I can see where you are coming from as its something you cannot join in with him on and in time I think these feelings your having now will pass, there are positive aspects such as the ladies weekends where its a big social get together in a nice venue and you can get to meet the other wives and partners. I have been to many of the ladies weekends and they are really good, all different people from all walks of life. I hope in time things will become easier and you will wonder what you were ever worried about

zaxdog

Perhaps you could take up carpentry and build him a den/tree-house where he can sit with his little friends? You could even make him a " No Stinky Girls Allowed" sign?

Seriously I'd laugh, shake my head and get on with a real life

PlutoinCapricorn

If you can't beat them, join them:

http://www.owf.org.uk/

Georgiegirl256

fluffnutter wrote: »

This was your first mistake. Not surprised you're feeling rubbish. If my husband wanted to join some silly little boys' club to compensate for the fact that he never got enough badges in the boy scouts I'd be pretty horrified too. Couldn't he have taken up golf instead??

Wow fluff, judgemental much?! If that's what interests her husband that's what interests him.

I used to work with a guy who was seriously into the Freemasons, he was quite high up in it, and he was always going off to meetings etc. I showed an interest once (just to be polite, not because I wanted to join), and he loved talking about it and explaining how there is a woman's one I could join if I liked! So OP, you could join too if you wanted, or you could do what this guys wife did and go to Zumba class etc, get your own hobby, then you won't be resentful of his. Either that or just enjoy the peace and quiet when he goes out!

I've got to admit, all of us at work used to find his obsession with the FM's a bit strange and even had our own name for them, but I'd never call it a silly boy's club. The FM's have been around for century's, generations of the same family go (the above guys son who I also worked with goes too), and they raise money for charity....I can't see any harm in it myself.

Pollycat

I can't see joining the freemasons as any different from him taking up another hobby such as crown-green bowling or golf.

If he went bowling or playing golf, wouldn't he be mixing with people that you don't know?