Weddings - evening invite

Legacy_user

I've been invited to a wedding but only as an evening guest. I've also been invited to the church service.

I am good friends with the bride and groom but frankly it ruins my day to go to the church and then 7 hours later attend the evening do.

Is it bad form to skip the church service and just do the evening do?

MSE Insert:

If you haven’t already, join the forum to reply. If you aren’t sure how it all works, read our New to Forum? Intro Guide.

belfastgirl23

I think it's bad form inviting you to the church and the evening do and not the reception. I'd say do whatever feels right for you!

Person_one

Not at all, they're the ones who've messed up here actually, but only a bit!

You don't need to invite people to the church, it's open to the public.

Alikay

No, not at all. I think it's perfectly acceptable to just turn up for the evening party. The invite to the church is just to let you know that you'd be very welcome to come along just in case you did want to see the ceremony.

Years ago, when it was common to put wedding announcements in the local paper, it was normal to add "all friends welcome at the church" to the notice and just send wedding invitations to the ones you wanted with you all day, and seperate evening invitations to the ones you asked to the party in the evening.

Buzzybee90

I always I thought an invite to the ceremony meant an invite to the breakfast.

Terrible manners! I'd just go to the evening.

claire16c

I never understand people who do this, I think you should invite someone to either the church and dinner, or the evening not a bit of each.

I would just go to one or the other.

Trixsie1989

This happened at a family wedding a few months ago and the girl that was invited to the ceremony only came to the meal anyway as she didn't get that she weren't invited to that so major panic for bride and groom as no meal ordered or anything! Xx

bagpussbear

Why is there 7 hours between ceremony and evening do?

Personally I'd only to only one, probably the ceremony.

Buzzybee90

Trixsie1989 wrote: »

This happened at a family wedding a few months ago and the girl that was invited to the ceremony only came to the meal anyway as she didn't get that she weren't invited to that so major panic for bride and groom as no meal ordered or anything! Xx

Surely you'd only know if it said ceremony and evening. Ahhh, I'm confused!

Georgiegirl256

Buzzybee90 wrote: »

Terrible manners!

I agree, I actually think it's quite rude tbh, I think I'd be offended!

You're usually either invited to the Wedding itself (which includes the reception) or the evening do.

I can totally see how it would mess up your day. If that was me, I wouldn't want to be sitting around in my finery all day at home until I went back out again in the evening.

Person_one

Buzzybee90 wrote: »

Surely you'd only know if it said ceremony and evening. Ahhh, I'm confused!

I can see why they assumed, it probably didn't occur to her that they'd be rude enough to expect her to sod off and amuse herself for a few hours while they fed and watered the more favoured guests!