Sensitive first post

Stephb1986_2

Tiredandstressed wrote: »

We are Steph unfortunately. If we didn't work, were on benefits with minimal rent to pay I guess things would be different.
Instead we decided a few years ago to buy a house to make a better life for all of us. We made the decision not to have children together and hubby is waiting or an appointment to discuss a vasectomy ( Sod's law) then New Year's Eve this happens. It was never planned this way and now it's happened I know we'll have to live with our choice.

I can see totally where your coming from I'm not here to judge. But I know a woman who lives over the road from me, she had a baby in late 2012, last year her central heating system packed up both of them are on benefits not working with 4 kids they haven't got the money to get it fixed and it's still not fixed now she's managed all winter without hot water or heating.


Steph xx

fluffnutter

xXMessedUpXx wrote: »

I know that personally if I somehow fell pregnant despite the precautions taken...

... I know that I wouldn't post on the internet about it . Like you say, it's such an emotional topic - rarely ends well.

Georgiegirl256

The first thing that jumped out at me from the first post is not the mention of getting an abortion, (as there is pro's and con's in every situation), but the mention of benefits straight away. What benefits can we get? What are we entitled to?

For that reason, I'm inclined to agree with fluffnutter in thinking the OP isn't genuine. If I'm wrong, I'm sorry OP, but that's just the feeling I get.

I mean, how did families manage before there was benefits? My Mam is one of 4, my grandad worked, but my grandma was a SAHM, and they managed fine, I'm not saying it wasn't a struggle at times, but people do manage, they have to. I just hate this benefit culture that exists nowadays. If people are entitled to things, then fair enough, but quite often, it's peoples first thought "what money can I get?"

Surely the OP would get maternity leave?

Mojisola

Georgiegirl256 wrote: »

I mean, how did families manage before there was benefits?

They relied on other family members to support them or they ended up in the workhouse.

Tiredandstressed_3

I was purely trying to work out the potential financials if I were to not work and look after a baby.
As I have never claimed any sort of benefit nor maternity pay I was unsure what the entitlements were if any.

j.e.j.

The OP doesn't sound very troll-ish to me. Someone wants advice on a sensitive subject and doesn't want to be identified with their usual account. And the replies sound genuine. Trolls are usually much easier to spot. But at the end of the day, whether or not it's a troll is not really the issue. This is an anomymous forum, - anyone could be anyone on here. We could all be a bunch of psychiatric cases for all the OP knows :rotfl:

Even if it's a spoof, someone reading this could be in a similar position and might have found the replies of use (had some rather unpleasant posters not waded in, as unfortunately often happens with this type of thread..)

Perhaps if people want a pro- and anti-abortion debate, posting links and what have you, they could start a thread over on Discussion Time?

Person_one

I don't think the OP did want advice though, did she? She's already made the decision and got an appointment.

sassyblue

Person_one wrote: »

If I thought the thread was real, I wouldn't have posted that. It would be very rare to hear a heartbeat so early though, wouldn't it? As I recall the heart has only just formed and started to function in the 6th week or so.

You're right you wouldn't hear a heartbeat, but the poster you referred to said 'see a heartbeat' which you would on the monitor.

Jobseeeker

Stephb1986 wrote: »

I can see totally where your coming from I'm not here to judge. But I know a woman who lives over the road from me, she had a baby in late 2012, last year her central heating system packed up both of them are on benefits not working with 4 kids they haven't got the money to get it fixed and it's still not fixed now she's managed all winter without hot water or heating.


Steph xx

Unless they people on benefits are homeowners, they can just get the landlord to fix it?

katrina001

I am quite disgusted by some of the replies. I cant see how anything the OP has put makes her a troll, and to be quite honest the number of times I read that on this forum is ridiculous. It is clear she has children from a previous relationship, and as for scans before abortion, I have never had one but I know people who have and they had scans. It helps to determine which type of abortion is most suitable. I wish the OP all the best, I have 3 children and I know if I found myself pregnant again I would be in turmoil as to what to do.