Mum showing up unannounced - have I been unfair?

Cottage_Economy

lostinrates wrote: »

I can agree its poor security.

But an open invitation? For a start, how does any one know a closed door is locked or unlocked until they have tried to transgress on manners by trying the door?

You've hit the nail on the head for me there.

I have NEVER tried the handle on someone's door without being invited to first or there being a prior arrangement where it is understood I will do that. Never.

Why on earth would you pitch up at someone's house unannounced, try their door handle just to see if the door is unlocked, and then walk in if it is!!

This thread is making me want to get a dog. A large one. With teeth. Big ones. To chase off all these friends and family who think it is ok to wander into my home if I've popped into the greenhouse for 10 minutes and left the back door on the latch.

paulineb_2

Some burglars do go around homes trying handles of doors and it is possible to be burgled when you are at home, it is safer to lock your doors even if its a minor inconvenience.

Brighton_belle

stebiz wrote: »

That's what bed time is for. Surely you can wait.

Seriously? Not if you don't have kids it's not, whatever age you are

scheming_gypsy

Have sex on the sofa. You can keep an eye on the back door - so no need to lock it, and after your mum walks in on you the first time, she'll make sure she rings next time!

Mojisola

Brighton_belle wrote: »

Seriously? Not if you don't have kids it's not, whatever age you are

And if you do have kids, having time to yourselves in the day when they are out can be fun. That was always the joke about why some parents were so keen on their children going to Sunday School!

catkins

Vicky123 wrote: »

An unlocked door is effectively an open door, an open door is an open invitation, that was the slogan for householders to ensure safety.
All those people who are happy to leave back doors unlocked have also had the problem of their mother walking in on them not once but three times, having a conversation with mother at this point about phoning ahead is unnecessarily awkward.

Whilst I think having an unlocked door could be an invitation to a burglar, I certainly do not think it is an open door for all and sundry to walk in whether they are neighbours, friends or relatives.

I have had a dog just about all my married life so never really had to worry about locking doors during the day. If I did not have a dog I would probably lock my doors, at least if I went upstairs.

I lived in France and a neighbour had a habit of just walking in the back door which drove me crazy. In the end I locked the back door so she couldn't do that but it annoyed me that I had to.

paulineb wrote: »

Some burglars do go around homes trying handles of doors and it is possible to be burgled when you are at home, it is safer to lock your doors even if its a minor inconvenience.

As I say, if I did not have a dog I probably would lock my doors but I am sure that even today there are some areas that are safe to leave doors unlocked

lostinrates

paulineb wrote: »

Some burglars do go around homes trying handles of doors and it is possible to be burgled when you are at home, it is safer to lock your doors even if its a minor inconvenience.

As I said, in many situations I'd agree, in my personal one I'm not sure I would, as a lot of our theft risk I'd not within our house, and with locked doors a lot of our warning system would be.

All I am saying is circumstances differ.

lostinrates

Mojisola wrote: »

I think it was one of those government public safety campaigns suggesting people don't make life easier for thieves by leaving doors unlocked.

I don't think campaigns telling thieves not to do it work very well so the onus is on householders to be security minded.

I agree on this. Nevertheless, I maintain'invitation' is a very poor word, even when applying to burglars. There is no invitation, they simply take without one.

scheming_gypsy

Mojisola wrote: »

I think it was one of those government public safety campaigns suggesting people don't make life easier for thieves by leaving doors unlocked.

I don't think campaigns telling thieves not to do it work very well so the onus is on householders to be security minded.

it's safer to leave the door wide open as you give the impression that you're in.

Abbafan1972

GeckoGirl1985 wrote: »

Thank you to everyone who has replied - Yes I understand now that it has been naive of us to leave the back door unlocked. We have a quite open planned house and you can definitely hear whenever someone comes in as we have a large stained-glass suncatcher hanging on it that rattles loudly whenever it is opened (thank goodness - that is how we knew she had come into the house this evening, giving us a moment to quickly throw our clothes on!) so it is unlikely that someone would be able to enter the house without us knowing. But I do understand what you are all saying and we will make a habit of keeping the door locked from now on.

I haven't read the whole thread, but it's definitely sensible to lock all your doors even while you're in. The only door I have unlocked when I'm in is the front porch door (for postie), but the main front door is always locked.

Re:- The highlighted bit ~ this bit worried me. Yes you can hear someone come in, but by then it's too late! You go downstairs, it might not be your Mom and could be a burgler armed with a weapon, you just don't know. I agree yes, you shouldn't have to lock your doors, but in this day and age you have to, don't mean to be rude, but it's common sense. Plus I'm sure it's the time of year people go on the rob.

I always keep my back door locked, a burglar would have to climb over the back gate to get to it, but I'd rather not give them the opportunity to get in.