Mum showing up unannounced - have I been unfair?

lostinrates

jetplane wrote: »

When I read your posts they often bring to mind Hannah Hauxwell for some reason :think:

I could NEVER be happy on £170 a year . And I'm not a spinster. If I were I'd not be grinning at our level of weekend spontaneity. I am bloody cold though, wish we did have a back door and some central heating and proper hot water.

Vicky123

Obviously I have not lived, thought all this crazy, impulsive lust was either strictly movies or very early days in a relationship, it definitely has the making of a movie, all common sense out the window.
In all seriousness though, mother walking in on this would be so cringeworthy that never again would the door be unlocked when back garden is not being used, like winter time, around now.

lostinrates

Vicky123 wrote: »

Obviously I have not lived, thought all this crazy, impulsive lust was either strictly movies or very early days in a relationship, it definitely has the making of a movie, all common sense out the window.
In all seriousness though, mother walking in on this would be so cringeworthy that never again would the door be unlocked when back garden is not being used, like winter time, around now.

Lots of people use their gardens year round. I was weeding today, and my dogs (those with the dog horn alert call) would use the back door that's a pallet if it were a back door (instead they use another door but not sure that's really relevant). Things like hanging out washing are done year round.

Part of this is just accepting that people live differently and areas are different. When I lived in London with no dog, no, I wouldn't have left a down stairs door open while I was upstairs, but I happily do so here, all summer, autumn and spring leaving the doors open as well as unlocked and my dogs frolicking in the garden.

Much of the crime we are exposed to in my area is farm crime, so oil tanks, farm machinery etc, and I want my dogs to be able to see/hear that when possible too. At night its easy from the house, during the busier days, its easier for them if they can see and roam further. Now, that won't apply to loads of other people, but I can certainly see that many people will live in an area where they feel they can go upstairs and feel they can hear any door opening down stairs.

melanzana

This board seems to be a magnet for winder uppers.

Think about it...OP complains about mother calling and finding daughter and oh in flagrante delicto.

What Does she do? Lock the permanently open door at the back? No, writes a post here.

We should have a poll for "spot the wind up post" .

The sad thing is, genuine posts will be seen with sceptical eyes very soon.

Valli

GeckoGirl1985 wrote: »

I forgot to say, she doesn't have a key - she is letting herself in through the back door which we leave unlocked when we are home. Perhaps this is foolish of us but then we are not used to having unexpected people simply walk in on us! Luckily tonight we were upstairs when she arrived so out of sight, but she could have easily walked in on us in the living room. My feeling is that we shouldn't have to lock the doors to our own home just in case somebody walks into our house unexpectedly. Not only that, but when she does arrive out of the blue it is still frustrating for us to have to stop mid-act if you know what I mean.

I used to leave my back door unlocked until some lowlife had it away with my handbag. I heard the door open, too...but, by the time I got to the back door the car was roaaring away up the road.

Tell her someone nearby has been robbed by an opportunist and you're locking the door from now on.

HPoirot

melanzana wrote: »

This board seems to be a magnet for winder uppers.

Think about it...OP complains about mother calling and finding daughter and oh in flagrante delicto.

What Does she do? Lock the permanently open door at the back? No, writes a post here.

We should have a poll for "spot the wind up post" .

The sad thing is, genuine posts will be seen with sceptical eyes very soon.

It might be a genuine scenario where the person posting enjoyed the thrill of being caught out in flagrante delicto by, say, the binman and only ended up with her mother so far on 3 occasions. Guess it's another thrill telling complete strangers about it, I suppose to make up for the disappointment of not having been caught out by a stranger in the first place.

In all honesty, it beggars belief that the OP did not have the common sense reaction of locking the back door and went on a rant against her mother instead.

lostinrates

HPoirot wrote: »

It might be a genuine scenario where the person posting enjoyed the thrill of being caught out in flagrante delicto by, say, the binman and only ended up with her mother so far on 3 occasions. Guess it's another thrill telling complete strangers about it, I suppose to make up for the disappointment of not having been caught out by a stranger in the first place.

In all honesty, it beggars belief that the OP did not have the common sense reaction of locking the back door and went on a rant against her mother instead.

Or it could just be that OP wants her mother to call so that when she comes round she can be dressed, ready to receive her and prepared, or arrange a better time.......

The suggestion to simply not answer the door I think is ok, but honestly the phone ringing/someone at the door does often put a dampener on things. If you know its not likely to be your poor dispossessed mother but some campaigner or something its easier to disregard.

melanzana

HPoirot wrote: »

It might be a genuine scenario where the person posting enjoyed the thrill of being caught out in flagrante delicto by, say, the binman and only ended up with her mother so far on 3 occasions. Guess it's another thrill telling complete strangers about it, I suppose to make up for the disappointment of not having been caught out by a stranger in the first place.

In all honesty, it beggars belief that the OP did not have the common sense reaction of locking the back door and went on a rant against her mother instead.

Indeed. Nail on head.

bylromarha

We live on an estate where 5 of our friends live. They pop over whenever. Knock on the back door, then come in.

One time, OH and I got jiggy in our room middle of the day (top floor, 3 story house) - only to be disturbed by a friend calling "hello" from the stairs leading to our room.

At the time he was an unmarried naive personality who was mortified as he worked out what we'd been doing.

We never left the back door open again - though made the same mistake with the curtains once. Getting it on in the living room, big glass doors to the garden - friend had come to collect things from the shed without us knowing. He'd have got an eyeful, but graciously has neve mentioned it!

itsanne

HPoirot wrote: »

It might be a genuine scenario where the person posting enjoyed the thrill of being caught out in flagrante delicto by, say, the binman and only ended up with her mother so far on 3 occasions. Guess it's another thrill telling complete strangers about it, I suppose to make up for the disappointment of not having been caught out by a stranger in the first place.

Similar ideas did cross my mind .