Childfree by choise

shoppaholic_returns

I find the fact that people automatically assume that if you don't have kids, it is because biologically you Can't have them!

It is for some a choice, not everyone wants kids.

Air_Cooled_75

I never wanted kids but OH did. We had been married 13 years and I was 37 when I unexpectedly found myself pregnant, oh, and 14-15 weeks along. Nobody ever made any comments about us not having kids, maybe they know what kind of reaction they would've got

I do love the little terror to bits though, but am deffo not a mother hen type.

Mssparkles

Finding this thread really interesting. I'm married and in my early 30's. I like children but child free by choice at the moment, I'm waiting for the broody feelings to set in but, as yet, nothing!
I always think people can be quite rude about asking why we don't have children, as how do they know we're not trying to have them and desperately want them but one or both of us is infertile?

I actually got asked the other day if I have children and when I said no, the woman actually replied "but what do you do with your evenings and weekends?"! :rotfl:

UKTigerlily

I'm almost 35 & have no kids, I don't get asked about it but do get told i'm good with kids. I'm female btw & it's obvious to anyone who knows me I love kids

nyc_451

I googled 'child free forum' with a hope of finding some more information and the first one I found was full of hatred towards children and mums... First impression - typical movement like vegans, red pill forums etc. Would never look for an advise in places full of angry people. Hating children seems totally sick to me.

:wall:

Almo

blue_mango wrote: »

I googled 'child free forum' with a hope of finding some more information and the first one I found was full of hatred towards children and mums... First impression - typical movement like vegans, red pill forums etc. Would never look for an advise in places full of angry people. Hating children seems totally sick to me.

:wall:

I don't hate children, but I wouldn't order one in a restaurant

Less flippantly, I don't hate them; I don't wish them harm, I don't enjoy seeing them suffer etc etc . They are individuals, and some are much nicer than others. I want to be involved in the lives of my friends and family, and that means being involved in the lives of their children, and I have fun when I'm with them, mostly. Equally, I find entertaining children exhausting and could not cope full time.

The analogy I often use with people is that someone not wanting to have their own dog/cat does not make them dog/cat haters.

Actually, several times upon learning that my partner and I have two cats, I've had people respond with 'I don't like cats'. I have never yet gone on to ask if they have kids, and given an equal response but it's been on the tip of my tongue once or twice.

Tiglath

Childfree by choice - I helped raise 2 stepchildren and that was enough, lovely though they are. Couldn't be doing with putting my body through childbirth and 18 years of hassle for something I actively didn't want. The truth is I find children really boring and irritating. My stepkids are great now they're adults, but man it was tedious until they reached their teens. Impact? I have the life I want and never regretted it It did mean I've kind of been pushed out of my adoptive family for not producing grandchildren but that's okay. I don't have any regrets whatsoever.

meer53

I'm not child free, i have 2. But sometimes i wish i was ! It's only a fleeting thought, i'd be devastated if i didn't have mine.

However i fully understand why people choose not to have them. It's not for others to criticise anyones life choices is it ?

Turtle

Child free by choice here. Been with husband nearly 18 years (though married only 6 months). We have lots of friends who don't want / have children either and I very rarely get comments about regretting it. I am quite vocal on the subject though so maybe people realise comments like that wouldn't be very well received.

I'm quite amused by the comment someone just referred to 'what do you do with your evenings and weekends?' We're never stuck for something to do.

We're 38 and 40 by the way.

Hermia

Turtle wrote: »

I'm quite amused by the comment someone just referred to 'what do you do with your evenings and weekends?' We're never stuck for something to do.

Someone made a comment like that to me once and it actually made me really sad. I was sad that that person clearly had no interests or hobbies or dreams they wanted to fulfill. It made me wonder how she was going to cope when the kids got old enough to do their own thing.