Family cut themselves out of my son's life

GobbledyGook

Sorry to make clear - I think you should ask about the transfer list as a way of kicking your HA to help you get the lock changed. Ideally you and Wiglet should never have to leave your home due to anyone else.

Sorry if that wasn't clear.

lisssa

Hi, I've been following your thread, but not commented until now.
Please please do not reply to your sisters text. It is clear that your mum is using your sister and continual emotional blackmail to try and get to you. Your mum was also being very calculating by mentioning the oar incident in one of her texts , as she is trying to discredit you, should you show the police the text as evidence that she is still contacting you.
I was a police officer until 3 years ago, and when I gave harassment warnings, depending on the seriousness of it, I would first give a verbal warning (all then noted against the incident). If they continued they then were given a formal harassment warning, which included giving them a letter detailing what the warning amounted to and it clearly stated that they should not contact the other party either directly or indirectly or they would be arrested. If they then made further contact, then of course they would then been arrested. I always stressed to the victim never to respond to any contact, as it potentially gave the other party the defence of ' well they responded so I thought everything was ok again, and they didn't mind me texting them'.
Please stay strong, and please report this again to the police they are there to help you. Oh and I can't stress enough get some support from woman's aid, we had an organisation called the sunflower centre (don't know it that was just a local organisation) and they provided so much practical and emotional support , so double check whether there is anything else similar in your area.

You are doing the right thing, and you have so many people on here who want to help you as well.
Take care and I hope u and wiglet have a lovely christmas together xx

mountainofdebt

GobbledyGook wrote: »

If your HA can't/won't change the door locks have you asked to be put on the transfer list?

OP - does your HA have a website ? If they do, they may have a page where people can list swop requests ifywim?

mellymoo74

Try homeswapper if you google it you will be able to join and then if you need to you can swap with other tenants.

theoretica

If you get the police to go round again ask them to demand the key there and then - I think it is unlikely your mother will have already had it copied. She would have had to think ahead and also find a key cutter willing to ignore the 'do not copy' restrictions.

wiggywoo9

I'm still waiting on a response from both police and women's aid.

I am on homeswapper but as I've got a maisonette on 2nd floor in not so good an area, its a tricky sell! I'd love a house, mainly as wiglet has never had a garden, but also for the dog, but I doubt that'd ever happen. There isn't another list, I don't think. Regardless, I paid £400 for carpet here, luckily had student finance that covered that plus costs of packing boxes and man with van, which I just do not have. And none of these places come with any flooring just nails and floorboards. In any case I want to stay as I don't have a good record for anything if living less than a year in places, for credit checks etc. And I've only just made friends, and got my son into nursery and me into classes here!

meritaten

and so you should stay there! BUT, you need to know that 'that woman' cannot get in!
I suggested getting the person who wrote the harassment letter, send another asking for the key to be returned to them. if the police are willing to go round again (they should with this continued unwanted contact and 'She' does not have a right to a key to this property) they may be so kind as to get the key off her?
Stay strong Wiggy - you are doing so well I am so proud of you! I can see you 'growing' as an adult - and I couldn't be more pleased than if you were my own daughter!

harrys_nan

I so agree with everything that meritaten has written, you are a woman that knows how to stand on their own 2 feet and a brilliant mother,I also would be proud if I was your mother, she really doesn't deserve you or wiglet
xx

MothballsWallet

paulineb wrote: »

<snip>
I do think you need to get a letter to her saying do not contact me and that includes phoning, email, texts, its harassment.

^^^ This.

Wiggy, if you can get your legal advisor to do another letter that says something along the lines of:

On <date>, you were told to stop contacting <wiggy's real name>. Since you have done so on several occasions after this, and still have a key to the building where she lives, you have demonstrated complete disregard and contempt for her wishes.

This letter is your final warning: return the key to my office address and do not attempt to contact her by any means, be it by letter, telephone, email, text message, social media, or personal visit or you will be taken to court under the Protection from Harassment (1997) Act.

Should you disregard this letter, I will be assisting my client in having you arrested and prosecuted under this Act, penalties for which include (but are not limited to) <followed by a list of what they are>.

[But then, I'm a rather cantankerous old guy ]

Yorkie1

MBW's suggested letter is good but I'd be clear that it included contact via sister.

I should also point out that 'taken to court' implies prosecution, and that's not something they can say "will" happen. That's up to the police and then the CPS.