Family cut themselves out of my son's life

paulineb_2

What court? Sorry, but she sounds as mad as a box of frogs.

Ignore.

wiggywoo9

I said court, assuming she pushes that far. I can't imagine the stories she's telling to the solicitor, I knew her old one from the past with my dad, but if I'm all ok now and have people to support that, surely she can't say much against me?

If I went to CAB, where would I start? Would it just be a one-off session? Can see myself telling them everything and being pointless as they couldn't help beyond that one session?

Counting_Pennies_2

paulineb wrote: »

What court? Sorry, but she sounds as mad as a box of frogs.

Ignore.

http://www.thefamilylawco.co.uk/grandparents/what-are-grandparents-rights/

There is something that can occur in order to gain contact.

I would make sure you have documented your struggle to get out of the grips of our family.

You have said you have spoken with several health professionals, but have they written it down. Would they be willing to speak up for you about this damaging relationship?

Definitely change your mobile number. But I would suggest putting this current one on a pay as you go, so you can look at it every now and then just to keep aware of what she is texting, but that it can't affect you daily.

I would definitely go to CAB to get their advice.

My DM is slightly deranged and I can see her being this controlling if I had stayed around in my home town. I can see her playing this stunt as well.

So stay strong. Document all your struggles in terms of needing to get away, historically and where you are now.

I really don't think it necessary to get a solicitor if you can't afford it. There must be enough help out there for you to get advice without spending money. Try the CAB first.

GobbledyGook

I was just about to post a similar link to that of Counting_Pennies.

Please go and see Cab or call around local lawyers/solicitors to see if any offer a free initial consultation, or one which you could pay up.

It's all very well people saying that your Mum has no rights, but as far as the family court is concerned neither do you. Your child has all the rights.

Don't try to second guess your mother too much. Before you had your baby did you ever imagine having to call the police to get your baby back from her?

You need to be prepared to show the reasons why contact with your mother would be harmful for your son. Bare in mind that your son has had recent contact with her so she will be able to use that in her favour.

You will have to show the reasons why you changed that fact for the sake of you both.

She has already shown in her 'keep an eye on him' text that you are, in her mind, not fit to have sole care of your son. If she wants to take him from you, or even just be in his life against your will, she has to show why she's good for him. You need to show why she's not.

wiggywoo9

Are you saying she has a chance to take him????

GobbledyGook

No, not at all. I'm saying it seems to me like she thinks she has (like my MIL did). So you have to prepare yourself for get not to just get bored and go away.

podperson

Wiggy - if you contact your local CAB office then they should be able to put you in touch with free legal advice. I know in this area they have a drop-in clinic once a week where you can go and speak to legal professional but it perhaps varies from area to area. As others have mentioned, she has no rights to see your child - she is not their parent and grandparent rights are quite frankly slim to non-existent, but I think it would be good for you to get an official opinion on it for your own peace of mind.
You're being amazingly strong for your little one, and she's just trying to frighten you. Hang in there x

HPoirot

No chance of taking him AT ALL. Call her bluff and get a restraining order. As has been said, if she goes the whole hog, the advice given to her and her course of action will depend on what yarn she has been spinning them.

Dimey

My advice continues to be - have no contact with your Mother. Do not reply to her texts.

I still think you should get a restraining order or an injunction which you'll need to get via the police. This will help your case if your Mother takes you to court. Go visit the domestic violence team at your local police station. The sooner the better so it doesn't look like a tit for tat retaliation on your part after you receive any communication from a solicitor.

The purpose of the restraining order should be to prevent your Mother harassing you and threatening to abduct your son. Just tell your story and take everything to show the police.

As mentioned before, you might be able to get free legal advice from Women's Aid. They normally deal with a spouse threatening children but in this case its your Mother doing the threatening. Explain it them and you never know, they may help. Tel: 0808 802 5565 / http://www.solacewomensaid.org/get-help/legal-services/

Womens Aid can also advise re the injunction.

mysecretalias

Wiggy my dear your mother has got her claws so embedded within you that she knows JUST how to push your buttons. She knows by sending these texts and saying these things she will have you frightened into replying.

Please start listening to others on this thread when they tell you that your mother has absolutely no right to your child.

You must, though, make sure you keep everything from now on, every text message, voicemail etc.

That way if she does spin a crock of lies to some none-the-wiser solicitor who tries to send you a vaguely threatening letter, you can be reassured into ignoring it, because you know you've got evidence of her being controlling and scaring you and harassing you.

Just please try to move on, and change your number so you aren't constantly living in fear of getting another text message. To be honest, if I were you I would look at the possibility of moving as well. That way these absolutely no way she can find you if she decides the next course of action is to turn up at your door and start making a scene (if she does this, DO NOT answer the door for anything)