Family cut themselves out of my son's life

wiggywoo9

Hello all,


We're just back off a nice holiday away (really helped). Had the man sorting this out come around with a formal letter of apology from mum- just very succinct, I will not contact and apologise. She stated it was just gifts left to put a edge of 'I haven't done anything, sweet, kind me but if you want an apology...'. And ensured the letter firmly stated she will not contact ME again- nothing about wiglet. It was written like a note excusing you from P.E.
She also signed the community resolution that admitted she did harass again and will not again. The man will get someone to contact me about a non-molestation order too. He says that's that now and he doesn't think they'll be anything else from her.


Feel positive!

harrys_nan

We can hope and pray she sticks to that now, maybe she will. Glad you had a good holiday, you and wiglet deserve that, I hope the weather was ok for you.
You take care , xx

cheepskate_2

Op...so you got someone to look after your dog?
And do you now have childcare?
As is the case when you fall out with someone, you would not expect them still to do free childcare and free dog sitting.

Maybe this is the problem, that rather than go it alone as a single parent as you are, you keep going back to the family to get free childcare/dogcare.. and who from your description seem VERY disfunctional ....
An easy way to solve this is to stay away from them, there is no need to bounce back and forth . By making contact and having them look after your child/dogs.,then why wouldnt they think everything was ok with you and them...................If they are as bad as you make out then really you are doing your child a diservice by having him round there.

purpleshoes_2

Her family don't look after her child. She only has contact with them when they turn up at her door to harass her.

sidefx

cheepskate wrote: »

Op...so you got someone to look after your dog?
And do you now have childcare?
As is the case when you fall out with someone, you would not expect them still to do free childcare and free dog sitting.

Maybe this is the problem, that rather than go it alone as a single parent as you are, you keep going back to the family to get free childcare/dogcare.. and who from your description seem VERY disfunctional ....
An easy way to solve this is to stay away from them, there is no need to bounce back and forth . By making contact and having them look after your child/dogs.,then why wouldnt they think everything was ok with you and them...................If they are as bad as you make out then really you are doing your child a diservice by having him round there.

I suspect you haven't read the whole thread Cheepskate!?

Maybe you should before you comment.

The OP has not seen her family for 10 months and the police have issued a no contact order on her unstable, nasty mother!

harrys_nan

cheepskate wrote: »

Op...so you got someone to look after your dog?
And do you now have childcare?
As is the case when you fall out with someone, you would not expect them still to do free childcare and free dog sitting.

Maybe this is the problem, that rather than go it alone as a single parent as you are, you keep going back to the family to get free childcare/dogcare.. and who from your description seem VERY disfunctional ....
An easy way to solve this is to stay away from them, there is no need to bounce back and forth . By making contact and having them look after your child/dogs.,then why wouldnt they think everything was ok with you and them...................If they are as bad as you make out then really you are doing your child a diservice by having him round there.

What are you on about???

purpleshoes_2

I think some posters really should engage their brain before they type. Big time.

If anyone was sitting feeling vulnerable and then read a post like that it could stop them sharing in future.

duchy

cheepskate wrote: »

Op...so you got someone to look after your dog?
People do take their dogs on holiday with them you know - she took a UK break not a cruise !
And do you now have childcare?

Wiggy has always had non family childcare

As is the case when you fall out with someone, you would not expect them still to do free childcare and free dog sitting.

What are you talking about? The family have no direct contact with Wiggy or her son - and haven't done for over a year. There is no child or dog care free or otherwise !!

Maybe this is the problem, that rather than go it alone as a single parent as you are, you keep going back to the family to get free childcare/dogcare.. and who from your description seem VERY disfunctional ....

Um - you seem to have misunderstood- Wiggy has maintained for the longest time that she wants no contact from her dysfunctional mother - It's the mother who is trying to force contact with her grandson -there is no "going back" to them. The total opposite in fact !

An easy way to solve this is to stay away from them,

Ya think ? Maybe she should tell them that she wants no contact .....and even speak to the police - and they go around and tell the Mother (at least twice now ) to stay away .....Oh wait a minute.....that is exactly what she HAS done !


there is no need to bounce back and forth .

Are you mixing up two different threads- there is no bouncing back. Wiggy has consistently kept the stance that her mother - who has tried to kidnap the child in the past- is to stay away from them both.

By making contact and having them look after your child/dogs.,then why wouldnt they think everything was ok with you and them..................

There is no making contact on Wiggy's part- Just her mad Mother turning up unannounced and uninvited and not being allowed in. Hence the police having to speak to her again............and it is dog singular not plural



.If they are as bad as you make out then really you are doing your child a diservice by having him round there.

Having him round where ? The child doesn't have any contact with the rest of the family as they live with the mother so if "round there" means the mother's house - you have misunderstood (or again possibly confusing Wiggy with another poster)

duchy

purpleshoes wrote: »

I think some posters really should engage their brain before they type. Big time.

If anyone was sitting feeling vulnerable and then read a post like that it could stop them sharing in future.

It was a very odd post indeed but just shows how people can misunderstand or transfer elements of their own situations/assumptions to other people's. I suspect the poster has had his/her own experiences of her own child "bouncing back" for " free dog and childcare" to jump to the conclusions they have (or maybe they just didn't read the thread properly ), Free dog and childcare mentioned twice - I think there's definitely a bit of transference going on . Most family members don't charge for childcare anyway and wouldn't refer to it that way.

thorsoak

For the record, Wiggy's mother tried to take the baby from Wiggy, inferring that she was mentally unfit to have the child, when Wiggy moved away, she has stalked her until she found out where she lived, she has attempted to get into Wiggys flat and has tried to undermine Wiggy's intent to go to college, to get a degree, and to make a life for herself and her son, claiming that she could go to court and get custody of Wiglet. This is the second time that police have had to talk to her and tell her to stay away.