Couples moving in together

couponqueen123

fake_smile wrote: »

Was just reading the thread which asks how we met our other halves and I couldn't help but notice the comments about people having only been together 6 or 7 months and moving in with their partners.

This seems really fast! How long do you think is right to wait, should there be a set time or do it when you feel it's right?

How long were you dating before you moved in and how was the subject brought up?

i meet my o/h on the net in march 2010 then he moved in april/may 2010 we still going strong now looking for our own house swn :T

lifes to short to wait if its what both want then do it

i say moved in he came to stay for the weekend and never went home

our lives just slotted together so well its unreal -- i believe in fate so it was meant to happen

neon_dannii

I'm so surprised by the amount of people who move in together so quickly! I feel like the odd one out. Am almost 25, been together coming up to 3 years and still live separately (and 60 miles apart).

anniemf2508

My OH moved in with me 3 days after we first met in person. May have been a crazy decision but it seems to have worked out....we've been together for 8 years and married for 6 in 2 weeks.

aileth

Circumstances really made us move in quicker than normal, it was about six months for us. We lived over an hour away from each other and I found out I was being made redundant, but had the possibility to transfer to the head office (coincidentally based in his city). Of course, job or redundancy, easy choice. I asked if I could move in with him as the job was different and I didn't want to take out a tenancy agreement for a job I was unsure about or pay the £££ in train fares to commute. I would've waited till well over a year I think without this.

poppycracker

I moved into DH's flat a month after we first really met. It was partly because where I was staying was packed to the rafters, my friend wanted her sofa back and I didn't want to go back home, and partly because it felt totally right. I felt so at home at his place, even when he was away at work.

lazer

We didn't move in together to after we got married.

We lived 100 mile apart and had keys to each others houses and spent a lot of time visiting each other - so it was lovely to finally live together after we got married.

I don't persoanlly like the idea of moving in too quickly, I wouldn#t move in with someone unless I was reasonably certain it was a permanent relationship.

CC-Warrior

neon_dannii wrote: »

I'm so surprised by the amount of people who move in together so quickly! I feel like the odd one out. Am almost 25, been together coming up to 3 years and still live separately (and 60 miles apart).

I agree, it seems that people who take things slowly are in the minority.

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

Having been railroaded into having exes moving in waaay too quickly for my liking - and the relationships didn't end well - I really can't imagine moving in together unless I've been with someone for a year now. It's all too easy to mistake infatuation for love and be swept along, only to find out that it's all going to sh|t a few months later.

I'd also only do it if I were certain I was prepared to have a joint tenancy for the first time; being the sole tenant has saved me from homelessness on more than one occasion - one ex was determined he would see me on the street as punishment for not loving him anymore, but failed, and one refused to leave (until his new girlfriend let him move in with her, then he changed his mind - they're now stuck living together despite splitting up and are fighting like cat and dog about selling their house - so both will be homeless soon, as neither can afford the mortgage alone and won't have any equity to buy anywhere else [shrug])


Having said that, I'm in danger of not being able to see my telly under the mountains of CDs and DVDs the Lovely Fella has brought round, he has his own toothbrush here, his guitar is propped up with my ones and he's had one of my band t-shirts at his for about 3 months. He does spend more time here than anywhere else. But he does live about 100 yards down the next street; it's obviously too far to take his stuff back when he walks past his door on the way to work in the morning :whistle:


Taking things slowly is lovely.

vodkachick68

I have been with my boyfriend for 20 months and there is no way we will be moving in together any time soon. Don't get me wrong I do miss having someone around and I miss the security but we both want to make sure our relationship is rock solid before we take that step. He is ultra cautious as he has been hurt in the past and also cos he's been on his own for nearly 4 years he is set in his ways.

I am looking forward to the day that we move into a place of our own but for now I am trying to enjoy the best of both worlds:D

fake_smile

My current partner said (about 3 months into relationship) that we should both agree to take thing slow because we've rushed with others in the past and it hasn't turned out well.

She said that we should wait at least a year before even discussing it.

A lot of obstacles face us anyway, live in different towns, I', in the city centre, she's rural and prefers that, plus I have a flat with housing association that I waited for for years. I am in a job with no scope for promotion. I would definitely have to learn to drive before taking the leap!