Couples moving in together

tattycath

rjhammond91 wrote: »

Are you me?! This is exactly the same for me!

hieveryone wrote: »

I moved in with my boyfriend after 6 months - and that was moving 2 hours away from my home town to be with him!

And that's very similar to me but I moved in after 3 months-and he told his best mate after a month of dating that 'I was the one'.
All many moons ago now and we're happily married and have been for several years.

Soleil_lune

It's going to be different for different people, but I have to say that moving in with someone after a few weeks, or anything less than 12 months would be too soon for me. You're still getting to know each other.

I have a friend at work (53 y.o) who split with her hubby 6 years ago, and she has a cheap little social housing bungalow which she and her ex had until he walked out. 2 years ago, she met a new man, and as much as he pleads with her for them to move in together (ie; he moves into her bungalow and gets in on the tenancy,) she refuses, saying 'it's MY home and I am never giving it up OR letting anyone else in on the tenancy!' So I don't see them living together anytime soon.

Her ex however: he moved in with the woman he left her for: three MONTHS after he met her, and within 6 months, they had split. He now lives in a grotty ground floor flat on a sink estate, while she is in the cosy little bungalow in a lovely area.

What I am trying to convey is that it would be unwise to move in with someone quickly, if it meant giving up a secure home that you had.

hgotsparkle

I'm probably one of the ones in that thread you're picking up on - we moved in together after 6 months.We were planning it but not so soon, its more just circumstances that made us do it sooner, but I'm glad we did. I don't think it would have been any different had we waited a few years - after all you never really know someone until you live with them!

seven-day-weekend

fake_smile wrote: »

Was just reading the thread which asks how we met our other halves and I couldn't help but notice the comments about people having only been together 6 or 7 months and moving in with their partners.

This seems really fast! How long do you think is right to wait, should there be a set time or do it when you feel it's right?

How long were you dating before you moved in and how was the subject brought up?

We met and got married within four months. It was just right for us and is still right 42 years later

We didn't live together until we were married and neither of us had lived with anyone before (although both of us had been engaged).

lostinrates

Soleil_lune wrote: »

It's going to be different for different people, but I have to say that moving in with someone after a few weeks, or anything less than 12 months would be too soon for me. You're still getting to know each other.
.

I'm still getting to know myself as I mature, develop, change opinions with experience and age.

BugglyB

I dont think its a set amount of time that I like to wait, more that I like to see someone in a whole range of circumstances first.

I like to meet his family and see how he interacts with his mother and sister. I like to see how he reacts to a very stressful situation or very bad news. I like to see how he copes with birthdays or Christmases or funerals. I want to see his 'true colours' and not just his 'Sunday best'.

seven-day-weekend

BugglyB wrote: »

I dont think its a set amount of time that I like to wait, more that I like to see someone in a whole range of circumstances first.

I like to meet his family and see how he interacts with his mother and sister. I like to see how he reacts to a very stressful situation or very bad news. I like to see how he copes with birthdays or Christmases or funerals. I want to see his 'true colours' and not just his 'Sunday best'.

I didn't think of anything other than I wanted to be with this wonderful man I had fallen in love with.

I was 21 and he was 22 - maybe if I'd been older I'd have been more cautious (but maybe not). But I'm so glad I wasn't, it was so romantic and we grew up together. Getting old together now after 42 years.

SmlSave

I met DH when I was just 18 and we bought a house together after 4 years as I didn't want to move into rented (having too much fun living at home). I then refused to marry him until we'd lived together for a year!

But our friends who have met partners in their 25+ have all moved in together much sooner.

bitemebankers

Blimey. Some people need to either 5h!t or get off the pot.

pixo

It was only 6 months for us... but we lived almost four hours away from each other.