The Trials & Tribulations of Trying to Conceive when its just not happening (12m+)

Rowingirl

Hi Tia I hope your stay is good. Keep badgering for an appointment as most surgeries only notice the loud patients.

Vesper I have that feeling and now feel that pregnancy is something that happens to other people (not in a martyrish way).

Code couldn't agree more with how infertility is shown on TV. The other thing is unrealistic are the causes of infertility in soaps? It's either falling down stairs or car accidents.

Thanks Sewit. I had some problems with the Ovitrelle pen so hope I can get used to the Gonal-F pens.

tea_lover

Its m/c on tv that wind me up. Its always so dramatic with a big rush to hospital. I swear this is why OH still has his doubts about whether ours even happened.

vesper

Agree completely Tea Lover, and the fact that they always seem to get pregnant straight away again. Even those in soap world that have fertility problems get diagnosed and woosh... pregnant 2 months later.

bigmomma051204

Just got back from GP appt number 6 (in 5 months)

GP today has told me that despite the other GP telling me months ago that my day 21 bloods were fine, this one has said they are "borderline" (apparently the "norm" is 30 and i was 27??)

Yet hubby was only sent for his SA which we had to wait ages for because of my results being okay.

She told me that "making babies CAN take a long time"... and whilst I wait (for all of the appts for repeat bloods, repeat SA etc) I can focus on "getting fit". Which is all fine apart from that i have been TTC for OVER 3 YEARS!!!!!!!!!!!! I also explained that although I was told aged 14 that i had cysts on my ovary, i wasnt ever diagnosed with PCOS. Also, I have been OPK-ing with digi ones for 5 months now and all but one month (probably dodgy test!) i got peak fertility on about day 13..... so that would indicate that i ovulate

She said I should be patient - I am 31, with only one damnn ovary and that has cysts all over it! PLUS hubby's SA came back "low-ish" (although one Dr asked for some "actions and a repeat test" but when hubby rang to actually get the results, the gp telling him them over the phone (not the one who ordered the test) said he thought it was fine and that was all... no instructions, no "what happens next"... at NO point have any of the GP's actually given us any info or "guided" us - I had to ASK for day 21 bloods. I had to ASK for hubbys SA after bloods came back ok.

Appt today i had to wait nearly 3 weeks for and it was LITERALLY a waste of time. She won't refer as we need to repeat bloods and repeat SA. Despite two other drs saying we didn't need to as the results for us both were "fine". And what REALLY upsets me is that if we had known from doing the first day 21 bloods back in October that I needed to repeat them, i would have booked in straight away for december! As it is, I am waiting for AF to arrive (imminent!) so it'll be another bloomin MONTH practically until i can even DO the test, then another week until results are in, then another 3 weeks from then until I will get an appt. So it'll be mid March until we reach the "next step". A step we have already done and were told was all "okay".

I literally drove out of the GP's and bawled my eyes out.

Why won't they just send us to the people who can simply see us together and help us make some kind of plan to see whats going on!?!?!

I feel broken.

vesper

bigmomma051204 wrote: »

Just got back from GP appt number 6 (in 5 months)

GP today has told me that despite the other GP telling me months ago that my day 21 bloods were fine, this one has said they are "borderline" (apparently the "norm" is 30 and i was 27??)

Yet hubby was only sent for his SA which we had to wait ages for because of my results being okay.

She told me that "making babies CAN take a long time"... and whilst I wait (for all of the appts for repeat bloods, repeat SA etc) I can focus on "getting fit". Which is all fine apart from that i have been TTC for OVER 3 YEARS!!!!!!!!!!!! I also explained that although I was told aged 14 that i had cysts on my ovary, i wasnt ever diagnosed with PCOS. Also, I have been OPK-ing with digi ones for 5 months now and all but one month (probably dodgy test!) i got peak fertility on about day 13..... so that would indicate that i ovulate

She said I should be patient - I am 31, with only one damnn ovary and that has cysts all over it! PLUS hubby's SA came back "low-ish" (although one Dr asked for some "actions and a repeat test" but when hubby rang to actually get the results, the gp telling him them over the phone (not the one who ordered the test) said he thought it was fine and that was all... no instructions, no "what happens next"... at NO point have any of the GP's actually given us any info or "guided" us - I had to ASK for day 21 bloods. I had to ASK for hubbys SA after bloods came back ok.

Appt today i had to wait nearly 3 weeks for and it was LITERALLY a waste of time. She won't refer as we need to repeat bloods and repeat SA. Despite two other drs saying we didn't need to as the results for us both were "fine". And what REALLY upsets me is that if we had known from doing the first day 21 bloods back in October that I needed to repeat them, i would have booked in straight away for december! As it is, I am waiting for AF to arrive (imminent!) so it'll be another bloomin MONTH practically until i can even DO the test, then another week until results are in, then another 3 weeks from then until I will get an appt. So it'll be mid March until we reach the "next step". A step we have already done and were told was all "okay".

I literally drove out of the GP's and bawled my eyes out.

Why won't they just send us to the people who can simply see us together and help us make some kind of plan to see whats going on!?!?!

I feel broken.

Hugs Bigmomma, is there any chance you can go straight through the hospital. After my first appointment, its been the hospital that's organised everything since, all repeat appointments and new ones.

bigmomma051204

vesper wrote: »

Hugs Bigmomma, is there any chance you can go straight through the hospital. After my first appointment, its been the hospital that's organised everything since, all repeat appointments and new ones.

Ignore the rantyness below lol - just got what u meant..... organised appt for repeat SA u mean? They wont do that unless GP refers unfortunately. Bloods all get done via GP, we are pretty rural so the hospital is a fair way away and u can't just go to have bloods done there, it just gets done at Gp then sent off.

I thought u meant via FS at hospital - hence the rant below (rant not at YOU btw lol, just generic!)
Thats the thing - the GP won't refer me.

After 3 years of TTC, and the guidance for local NHS saying 12months of TTC means referral, I am still not being referred.

I have asked for referral to FS until I am blue in the face. They just won't budge. They just keep saying to be patient and one GP said "you should be grateful you have already got one."

I am grateful for my son. Very much so. But try telling that to my DH who hasn't any biological children (and never will have at this rate!) Also, as far as I was aware, we aren't living in China - there isn't a "Limit" is there? Plus, it would be nice to just know that our bodies are working/not working as they should. For health reasons, if nothing else, eh?!

codemonkey

time2deal wrote: »

Spy!! How long have you been stalking me? Don't make me get these guys on your case!!


Bigmomma that is terrible about your GP. Is there another practice you or DH could switch to? If even one of you could find someone to refer you then you could get on with it.

vesper

Sorry bigmomma, I'm not very good at writing down things that are clear in my head, they don't always look like they were meant to.


Yeh I meant the SA, hubby had to have his redone, but the hospital sorted that. But it could be because we were already under the hospital I suppose.
None of our tests except our initial ones were organised by our GP's.


Is there another doctor you could have a talk to at your surgery, or even a Nurse Practitioner?

time2deal

vesper wrote: »

Agree completely Tea Lover, and the fact that they always seem to get pregnant straight away again. Even those in soap world that have fertility problems get diagnosed and woosh... pregnant 2 months later.

I also find there is a disproportionate amount of 'crazy desperate infertile steals a baby' storylines. I advise nobody watch this weeks silent witness!

vesper

Yeh no wonder no one in the real world ever wants to discuss fertility with people that are having problems with ttc. They think we are all psycho loonies that go around stealing babies.


One of my friends was worried for a very long time after having her little boy as she thought I would be upset if I babysat him (no she didn't think I would steal him). I actually love having him and am babysitting him tomorrow night.