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The Trials & Tribulations of Trying to Conceive when its just not happening (12m+)

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time2deal
time2deal Posts: 2,099 Forumite
edited 2 February 2014 at 5:10PM in Marriage, relationships & families
This is a continuation of the old thread that was locked.
https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/1817971

Welcome to the long term TTC thread! This is for people who have been TTC for a while, or know they are going to not have a straightforward experience of TTC. There is a huge range of reasons why people post here, and most of them have put a summary below so you can get your bearings.

Everyone is welcome, and please don't be intimidated by the banter. The ladies here understand the long term heartache of this process, and also can give lots of advice and experience. It's also a great place to rant when one more facebook friend starts to complain about how wonderfully fertile she is!

The normal TTC thread is here: https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/4783851 and the ladies there are lovely too.

The first post there also gives some of the acronyms, but please don't hesitate to ask anyone here if there are some you don't understand.


Team TTC info
  • Angeltreats TTC#1 since 08/12, NTNP for at least a year before that. 33 OH 33. Investigation so far: Scan & 21 day bloods for me, all ok. OH has low sperm count & low motility. Next step: First FS appointment 28 November & DH urology appointment 29 November
  • Babywanted TTC for 10 years, all tests clear on both me and hubby, unexplained infertility, miscarried twins April 2012
  • bigmomma051204 TTC#2 since 01/12. PCOS. One ovary due to childhood issue. Overweight, but regular 28 day cycle.
  • Chickpea. 40 TTC#2 since 09/09. Mmc Aug 2013 and m/c Dec 2013. Treatment: run out of options, hoping for a miracle.
  • codemonkey TTC#1 since Oct 2010. 34, DH 32. Investigations so far: Transvaginal ultrasound and HSG all normal, SA showed azoospermia with no vas deferens. MESA/TESA impossible. TESE ruled out due to high risk. Next step: lick our wounds and consider sperm donation/adoption routes.
  • cwtw Ttc #1 since Jan 12, me 31 OH 32. Me: PCO normal weight and symptomless except bleeding too often; some anovulatory cycles. OH normal everything. Next Step: On inositol, first fs appt Sept 13 eek.
  • Danielley TTC#1 since July 2012. Me - almost 35, OH - 34, currently under a consultant at Liverpool Womens, had initial tests (D3 & D21 bloods, external ultrasound, HSG, SA) All fine other apart from borderline abnormal creatinine level in blood so repeating test. Been prescibed 3months Clomid - 1st Cycle Oct 13. Next step: Appt with FS 18/12/13
  • Elsie37 TTC#1 since 02/12. 31. Next step: FS appointment 29 July
  • emmaj30 37. DH 43. Im am awaiting my laprscopy and dye test which should come through very soon. Have had various blood tests which seem fine and a scan which came back normal.. If all clear in laprascopy will be put on IVF waiting list .
  • Fairy Dust TTC#1 since 2006 (well NTNP for the first year). DH 38 Me 38. Unexplained infertility. All tests normal (strange how you hope that they find something wrong that they can "fix"). Failed IVF 1st cycle August 2013. Next Step Booked in for 2nd cycle Feb 2014.
  • Floaty (34) DH 38. TTC#1 since 01/09. No obvious fertility issues from GP tests, slightly poor SA. Nearly finished all FS tests (day 3 bloods, day 21 bloods, internal ultrasound, HSG - just OH's SA to go). Next step:2nd FS appointment 22 Oct.
  • FrozenPenguin TTC#1 since Dec 2011. Me 31, DH 35, Me: mild PCOS,irregular cycles and irregular ovulation. Had Day 3/Day 21 tests, Ultrasound,HSG, 7 rounds of Clomid. DH: low SA in all 3 areas (count, morphology and motility)and a varicocele. Next step: Provera, Suprecur and Gonal-F to start January, ICSI planned for mid February
  • goodvibes TTC#1 since 04/12. 36 OH 38. Investigation so far. Me no problems OH low sperm count. Next step: Current on 3 cycles of clomid on 3/3 BFN. Next appointment early Oct.
  • isla_red TTC#1 since 05/11, 32 OH 33. I have a history of painful ovarian cysts but all scans internal and external clear and 21 day bloods okay for me. Discovered OH has a low sperm count in 2012 so removed from IUI list and transferred to ICSI list. Next step Currently awaiting reaching top of NHS ICSI waiting list, first appointment predicted circa Jan 2014
  • lisawood78 TTC # 1 since 2003, I'm 35 hubby 38. Hubby no issues. No fallopian tubes due to ectopic pregnancies caused by severe adhesions. 9 Failed IVF/ICSI/FET cycles. Next Step: Surrogacy consultation on October 4th
  • Littleme82: TTC 06.09.12 when coil removed. Regular cycles 26-30. Blood tests show low progesterone. Scan all ok. DP SA all fine. 3 clomid cycles unsuccessful. Next Step Seen FS. Advise 3 further cycles of clomid. If unsuccessful then book in for HSG and possibly IVF.
  • loveactually me 33, DH 43, officials started TTC from May 2013 but NTNP from last 2 years. no problems from DH. For me moderate endo which was operated in Nov/13. But very low ovarian reserve according to AMH test and FSH hormone so referred to IVF first appointment on 4 February
  • lucyloo77 TTC#1 since 07/2011. 35, OH is 41. OH has low SA/motility, me no known issues. Unsuccessful IVF/ICSI in May 2013 and August 2013.
  • MrsDavo TTC#1 (together) since 01/2011. 25, OH : 35. I have 6yr old girl, he has 4yr old girl both from different relationships. MMC April 2012. Diagnosed PCOS Dec 2012 - i ovulate on my own maybe twice a year! Male slightly low. Tried 3 cycles of Clomid in 2013. Next step: Metformin for 3 months daily, back to FS on 5/2/14.
  • onestep TTC#2 (dd 9) we've stopped actively ttc now, & are investigating adoption. Next Step Waiting to be assigned a SW
  • Part Mouse TTC#1 since 2009. 29 DH 36. PCOS, blocked right tube, no ov. Male problems as well. No response to tamoxafin. Next Step: Currently injecting Menpur to stimulate ovulation.
  • Peonie TTC #1 since 08/10. 35, DH 38. Severe endo. 1 MC 06/12. Next step: IVF short protocol in January..
  • Purcy81 TTC#1 since 09/12 aged 32 DH aged 32. 2MC (Oct 12 & Jun 13) Irregular and long cycles with late OV and short LP (managed to get it to 10 days now with AC and Vit B6). Other than this no known problems on either side. Next steps Just keep trying, both MC have been confirmed by the doctor but no medical help or even testing will be forthcoming as we can get pregnant and they only test after 3MC as having 2 is "probably just bad luck"
  • Picklekin TTC #1 since July 2012. 35, DH35. No problems found on either side. Have had bloods, HSG and SA. Next Step: On 4th cycle of Clomid, even though I was seen to ovulate it without it.
  • Primmer TTC#1 since 2009. 39, DH 48. Unexplained infertility. Unsuccessful IVF treatment. Considering adoption but still hoping for a miracle.
  • Rowingirl TTC#1 since March 2011. 30, OH 37. Regular cycles, no chronic illnesses, blood tests, SA, HSG & hysterscopy all came back normal. GP diagnosed unexplained infertility and applied to CCG for fertility funding. IVF Cycle Nov 2013. BFN. ICSI Cycle in late January.
  • sadshoequeenAge 39 originally TTC #1 2009, mc may 2011, breastcancer diagnosis aug 2011, TTC again since July 2013 think ovulating but maybe randomly as one ovary, fsh levels fine. Next step: unsure
  • Sewit TTC #1 Oct 2011. Me - 35, DH 38. Unexplained Infertility. AMH 4. 1st IVF 8 eggs, 4 fertilised, 2x2dt -BFN Stepping away from TTC until Jan 2014.
  • skint_catt TTC#2. (DD aged 2). Weve been trying for 12 months & hubby is 42 & I am 36. next step: pelvic scan 24/10/13 & waiting for AF for GP to do more bloods on CD3.
  • Skaps So far have had my blood tests, OH has had his tests which have come back fine. Had an ultrasound and they think they found a polyps so am going to have a hysteroscopy to check and remove it if its there.
  • Smookle TTC for approx 18 months. Aged 27. DH 29. Had laproscopy and diagnosed with moderate Endo and adhesions. All allegedly fixed and fine but still not pregnant. Regular, short cycles, ovulating 2 out of 3 times. Failed IUI Dec/14 Next step - IVF/ICSI referral for Jan 14
  • Star02 Married in 2008 and been trying to conceive since 2009, in 2011 had tests and confirmed would need ICSI, however I was too young to qualify for NHS funding. JNext Step Just received letter to have a referral as although still to young based on prior criteria they have removed the lower age limit due to the change in the age discrimination laws.
  • teaandcupcakeordeath TTC #1 since 04/2011. Me (30). BMI 31. Unicornuate Uterus, PCOS, Mild Endo. Irregular cycles. Elevated Prolactin. DH (30) Poor SA results (count, motility and morphology). Next Step: Slowly going mad. Awaiting Brain MRI results to check for benign tumour. Next Step: 2 cycles of NHS IVF with ICSI approved when results are in and BMI at target.
  • Tea Lover TTC#1 since 2009. Me - 34, endo, pcos. OH - 41, v poor SA results (count, motility, morphology). Clomid - didn't do much. One ICSI cycle - BFP then early m/c. Next step: ICSI #2 - first appointment 31.10.13
  • theonlywayisup TTC#1 since feb 12. Me (29) pcos, long irregular cycles. OH (30) awaiting results of SA. Also awaiting fs appointment and results of possible partial molar pregnancy.
  • time2deal TTC#1 since 10/11. 37. DH 376. Low AMH, Low SA - but ovulating fine. Overweight (29 BMI). Cervical cancer 12/12 (remission 03/13). IVF 01/13 9 frozen embryos. IVF Nov 2013 cycle cancelled due to cervical scarring. 3 embryos frozen. Next Step Unsure. Considering NHS IVF
  • Vesper 29 been with hubby since 2003. NTNP since end of 2003. Early MC 2006. It made us realise the time was right and started trying properly by following Ov in around 2010, and using a cbfm in Oct 2011. Hubby had mumps as a toddler. SA in 08 showed a low sperm count, but not sure on details. Next Steps. trying to get a SA for hubby again, and been refered for day 21 bloods at local hospital. Waiting for appointment.
  • Whattodonow TTC#1 for for over 2 years. 32, Had all scans - OK, OH has supersperm, I have around 11 AMH, so not great. Three rounds of clomid - totally eff-ed up my cycle and effected my eyesight, so didn't complete 4th round. Next step Awaiting consultant appointment to begin IVF treatment
  • Wonder Woman TTC#1 for approx. 1 year. Me: 27, no known problems, DH: 34, problem with vas deferens. On 1st NHS IVF cycle (long protocol)Next step Down reg scan booked for 12 Nov 13. Hoping for EC in w/c 25 Nov 13.

Graduates:

SexKitten. 26-08-2013. Cautiously optimistic! IVF cycle
mrsHappy BFP 22 September. :j
History: I am 40, OH is 49. TTC since March 2011. I have a 16 year old son from a previous relationship. OH is a Cystic Fybrosis carrier, which had led to him not having any vas deferens, so although he produces sperm it has nowhere to go. We have had private treatment at Glasgow Nuffield, no NHS funding at all as I have the teenager. OH had PESA so we have sperm in the freezer. Unsuccessful ICSI Feb 13. donor egg ICSI cycle now. Next Step ET Sat 14/09

vseviour BFP 23 September.:jHistory: TTC#1 since 04/2011. 30, DH 28. I have irregular cycle, he has poor count, motility, etc. Both overweight. Lost 4 stone to get BMI to 30, 6 month of Clomid no joy, just been for Prostap jab, Next step: 22nd Aug and having ICSI at end of Aug.
Mrs_T_M BFP October 2013 :j TTC#1 Trying since September 2012, no tests or investigations allowed yet due to weight. I am 28, DH is 25. Very regular cycles (26-29 days).
Derby2 BFP 1 Dec 2013 :j
TTC#1 since 09/08. 34, DH 34. Stupidly low AMH, DH fine. Miracle BFP ended in m/c 01/13. 6 rounds clomid, 4 IUI. Next step Started down-regging 20th October; long protocol; Burserelin and Menopur 225ui. 3 eggs, 2 embies, 1 transfer - BFP!

Ladies, please post any updates in magenta. I only update this from time to time, and it's easier to see the changes if they are in colour.
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Comments

  • tea_lover
    tea_lover Posts: 8,261 Forumite
    Yay!! :):)
  • Derby2
    Derby2 Posts: 292 Forumite
    OMG...can't believe we've got a shniy new thread! Yay!
  • codemonkey
    codemonkey Posts: 6,534 Forumite
    Another one? I'm confused.

    I want my pre-drugs functioning brain back.
    Eu não sou uma tartaruga. Eu sou um codigopombo.
  • Wonder_Woman
    Wonder_Woman Posts: 309 Forumite
    Ooh new thread!!
    tea_lover wrote: »
    That's what I was wondering! I didn't know if it was full-on topless situation or just down to bra. I don't mind either, I just hate the thought of not knowing. Or accidentally stripping right down when they were just thinking you'd take your shoes off .

    :rotfl: this happened to me the other day when I went for a scan, woman left the room before I could ask and didn't say whether or not to undress - didn't want her to come back and find me knickerless, legs akimbo when she was only expecting to see my stomach.

    I suppose all the indignity prepares us for when we get our bfps and have to be prodded and poked even more! :)
  • SewIt_2
    SewIt_2 Posts: 271 Forumite
    Seventh Anniversary Combo Breaker
    Posted this on the other thread before it closed! Moving it over here now.

    hi ladies, sorry not been on for a while, been sooo busy at work.

    I did acupuncture and still am. I find it very relaxing and I also found it great during the IVF to have someone 'detached' from it all to talk to about it. It was like having someone hold your hand through a very difficult time, I could ask her any stupid question that I wanted and she always had time for me. It also helped to remove the 'medicalness' from the process and make it a bit more natural and relaxing for me. She specialises in fertility acupuncture.

    I'm still seeing her now, it feels like she is really in my corner. On her advice I'm also going to see a nutritionist and a Chinese herb person. Not arranged that though and am a wee bit sceptical about the herbs, but will see!

    If I've not said already, massive congrats to the BFP ladies, lets hope your luck rubs off on the rest of us!

    PM - great you have a good lining and a wee follie!

    Tea - yeah to starting ICSI again!

    WW & Derby 2 - very interesting about ICSI. During our IVF we got a fertilisation rate of 50%. Our consultant did admit this was a little low, but said they only do ISCI if there is a real need for it. I'm not too happy about this, as surely if by using ICSI we might get a higher fertilisation rate (and therefore maybe some frosties) then surely that is the route to go down? I will go in with your experiences as ammunition to push for ICSI I think!

    AMF - CD25 and feeling great physically (no cramps or sore boobs for once). However, mentally its awful! Despite the fact that we only managed to DTD once this month (due to me being away with work a lot), a tiny part of me is thinking 'maybe this will be the month, just when you least expect it'. How stupid is that! I hate the hoping, it makes it hurt more when its another disappointment.

    Does anyone else feel massively stupid a lot of the time for even daring to hope that we might get our BFP?

    hugs ladies xx
  • tea_lover
    tea_lover Posts: 8,261 Forumite
    SewIt wrote: »
    Does anyone else feel massively stupid a lot of the time for even daring to hope that we might get our BFP?

    Yes! I've had cycles where we literally haven't DTD within a fortnight of ov. (not to mention the lack of functioning sperm anyway) and I still wonder if somehow we've managed this time.
  • tea_lover
    tea_lover Posts: 8,261 Forumite
    Ha! I've just done that classic 'try to answer the phone then realise it's the radio playing the song you have as your ringtone'. Good job I'm on my own here today!
  • SewIt_2
    SewIt_2 Posts: 271 Forumite
    Seventh Anniversary Combo Breaker
    Tea, I'm so glad it's not just me! x
  • codemonkey
    codemonkey Posts: 6,534 Forumite
    SewIt - I do that too. Sometimes I do that thing where I feel sick or something or my boobs hurt and I think "ooh maybe I'm finally pregnant". Then I realise I'm CD8 or something and feel stupid. Even in the 2ww I feel stupid for these thoughts.

    Tea Lover -Sounds like the sort of stupid thing I'd do. My ringtone now is a WWE wrestlers entrance theme so it's not likely to come on the radio. I've been known to answer my home phone with a work greeting. "Hello, XXcompany, Xdivision, codemonkey speaking, how may I help you".
    Eu não sou uma tartaruga. Eu sou um codigopombo.
  • time2deal
    time2deal Posts: 2,099 Forumite
    SewIt wrote: »
    Does anyone else feel massively stupid a lot of the time for even daring to hope that we might get our BFP?

    Totally. And I feel like people are thinking - seriously?! you?! Get real.

    But I still hope. The Zipster is a bit of a motivation on that front. I was really surprised when she got her BFP (hope you don't take that the wrong way BZ!) and it reminds me that it really could just happen.

    Plus I've lost lots of weight, as she did, so I'm even more kidding myself. I always sort of hope that at the many random scans I go to they will say 'oh - there seems to be a small person in there!'
This discussion has been closed.
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