The Trials & Tribulations of Trying to Conceive when its just not happening (12m+)

Part_Mouse

I have to say I'm pretty confused as to why I'm going through so much to ov when ov is just one of the probs we have. I know I don't ov on my own at all. I do still feel really angry that I've got a blocked tube that could have been prevent but wasn't, in a way I want to have surgery now to see if that will help.have had dh on vits for his swimmers he's pretty much give up on taking them though as we've been trying so long with no sucess.

In terms of where we go if we're unable to conceive I don't really know, I've always know we would struggle but was pinning my hopes on the medics giving me my much longed for baby.

Part_Mouse

Just to add if I never have children I know there won't be any others in my family which in its self makes me really sad.

GlasweJen

I don't know if I belong on this thread but I can't find anything similar on the forums.

I can't have children due to graft-host disease and I have a transplanted heart so it might not cope with pregnancy.

We joined COTS in November and are awaiting our induction before being matched with a surrogate. Meanwhile my doctor has told us to start looking into IVF as my mum had to have a hysterectomy at 34 due to ovarian cancer and my younger sister had cervical cancer at the age of 20 - she's fine now but everyone is very concerned that it could be genetic and I might run out of time.

We have the money together and are looking to have a private IVF consultation in February - any embryos will be frozen until we are matched with a tummy mummy which can take months or even years.

I was hoping I could pick up some ideas on what to expect on this thread if you lovely ladies will have me?

Whattodonow

Welcome Glaswejen, you're very welcome. There's a whole host of experience on here you can draw from. I'm currently going through IVF so if you have any Qs...

Sorry to hear you and you're family have been through so much. Good luck on your journey, xxx

PM - I think you should have a word with your clinic, their plan at the moment seems torturous to me. Push for something more direct if you want it. Good luck x

Part_Mouse

Welcome glaswejen so sorry to hear your family have had so many things to cope with.

Wtdn I'm not sure what's best tbh, my fs said to carry on with the injections until the end. I know for me each. Cycle takes a few months so looks like most of next year will be spent injecting.i don't know if surgery would help, I would need to be medicated following surgery aswell.

GlasweJen

My main question is oh my god do we need all those drugs and how on earth do they get away with charging so much???

I'm nervous that we wont have enough embryos though we would only be transferring one at a time. We need to pay for IVF for us, transfer for the surrogate however many times that takes plus surrogates time off work, transport to hospital, time off for maternity related appointments, an allowance for maternity clothes, any extra surrogate is out for anything remotely related to pregnancy which is all fine but apparently totals about £12k just in surrogacy expenses.

We have talked and decided we want a lady who has done this before and successfully given up the baby to its biological parents as I'm terrified I'll get attached to a bump only for the woman to decide to keep our baby plus claim child support (can't believe surrogate arrangements aren't even remotely legally binding in Scotland).

jujugaboo

Its been a while but just popping in to see how everyone is doing, sadly seeing some of the same old names. Congrats to the graduates and have everything crossed for everyone else in 2014.

Whattodonow

GlasweJen - were going NHS so can't advise on private treatment. Have you discussed going NHS with docs? I'm not sure if or how that would work with surrogacy in Scotland.

There are a lot of drugs, but once you get going it gets a lot less scary. I was terrified of self injecting at first but I'm pretty much blas! with it all now.

It sounds sensible that you want to use someone who has been through it all before. I don't know much about surrogacy but according to Corrie (!) it looks as if the legalities are also complicated in England. That's the limit of my knowledge though, hopefully someone else can help you more!

GlasweJen

we don't qualify for NHS help because neither of us has any known fertility issues! I'm so sick of the inside of my local hospital that I'd rather have it done somewhere nicer anyway.

Part_Mouse

Glaswejen that's a bummer you don't qualify for nhs treatment.