The Trials & Tribulations of Trying to Conceive when its just not happening (12m+)

codemonkey

He's a sensitive soul so I think he's just convinced himself that it's not happening and that's it. He did say that he was ok with it if it didn't happen because the only one he really wants is me, which was nice to hear.

Hope you get some answers soon PM. I wish the news was better for you.

If a genie came and offered me three wishes, my first would be that I could have a baby, and the second would be that everyone on this thread got babies. The third would be that whenever I wanted to buy something, the money would appear in my purse.

codemonkey

angeltreats wrote: »

Code they are so frustrating aren't they. My DH is actually not bothered. He doesn't care if there's a baby or if we never have one, he's only doing it because I want to. Left to his own devices, he'd probably never want to have a baby because he values his free time too much and would rather play videogames every waking hour he's not at work. So it's good of him to play along I suppose but the support has stopped and now he's just bored of it all and bored of me being depressed, because unhappy wives are not fun or interesting to be around.

PM definitely persevere till you can get hold of the FS.

I think men just don't feel that biological need that we feel, so as far as they're concerned, it's disappointing but they get over it because they have free videogame time or holidays or whatever, whereas we feel devastated and empty and sad and like something is missing.

It's a bad time of year to be infertile - all these adverts showing excited kids ripping open their presents just reminds us what we're missing.

Having said that, it was my nephew's birthday yesterday and we went to give him his gift and he's such a ball of energy, we were totally knackered afterwards.

Part_Mouse

code so sweet of you to think of us all.

codemonkey

Part_Mouse wrote: »

code so sweet of you to think of us all.

Yeah, screw world peace. Babies for everyone!:rotfl:

Part_Mouse

codemonkey wrote: »

Yeah, screw world peace. Babies for everyone!:rotfl:

:rotfl:now theres an idea.

teaandcakeordeath

Hi ladies,

I've just caught up on the thread as I haven't been here for moons. I've got to the point now where I'm miserable about being miserable about infertility so I didn't want to spread the misery around. Lol.

I'm sorry if I forget anyone! My memory is carp at the best of times!

WTDN/ Peonie- how is the Hewitt treating you both? Have you been to any of the support meetings? I missed one last month being stuck in work from the embryologist which really irritated me.

T2D Fingers crossed your insurance aren't ars.ey and just pay up. I hope that it goes well for you. I really admire your ability to keep going (that sounds really condescending and I totally don't mean it to- I just mean that you are one strong lady!)

Code I'm glad things are moving for you. Don't worry too much about your BMI- buy these instead- http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/In-Sock-Arch-Support-Height-Increase-Heel-Lift-Shoe-Insert-Insoles-Men-Women-/200959846895?pt=UK_Men_s_Shoes&var=&hash=item2eca23e9ef . I'm now 5'7" and my BMI has miraculously lowered... :rotfl: I've now gained back all of my pre-engagement weight (13 stone 8!) so I absolutely have to stick to my diet like glue now before the Hewitt send me away for being a porker. New rule is eat nothing that I haven't cooked from scratch- puts the kibosh on my takeaway downfall and alarming Ben and Jerry's habit.

PM I really hope that your FS can help you, the treatment plan that they have you on seems crazy.

Tea I hope you're OK. You've gone quiet!

Angeltreats Sorry to hear you're struggling. 2013 has been such a terrible year for so many people. I can't wait for 2014- I've already built it up in my head to the best year ever! I hope it is for you. I found this website helpful when I started to go wrong http://inclusion-matters-liverpool.org.uk/ . I know it's for Liverpool but they have some self tests and coping methods on there. The counselling website for infertility may help you find someone in your area too http://www.bica.net/ . My infertility counsellor has saved my sanity, I want to find a cupboard for her in my house and keep her in it. She's the one good thing about infertility.

RG So sorry about your first cycle- I really hope that Peonie's advice that the first cycle is a 'trial' run turns out to be true for you.

WW Congrats on the egg haul! Hope everything goes smoothly for the transfer.

SewIt It's good that you've waited for your next cycle, no point in going into this malarky without being 100% into it. I really hope it works.

Derby I hope that your body is just fooling you. Got everything crossed for you.

Star :wave: I don't think I've spoken to you before. *facepalm* for your OH and his frozen SA though! I'd definitely get onto the clinic to let them know that he'd chilled them!

Loveactually fingers crossed your journey to IVF goes smoothly!

AFM, I've finally been referred back to the fertility clinic. The endocrinologist was happy that my prolactinoma wasn't going to 'splode (or whatever it does) and has told the FS I'm fit for treatment. Obviously I now have to wire my jaw until the appointment and bandage my heel lifts to my feet (totes ethical...) for when they weigh and measure me. I've been referred to a neurosurgeon and the pituitary clinic to see if he wants to remove it or just keep it under observation to make sure it doesn't affect my vision. TBH unless it's about to burst out of my face I have *no* urge for brain surgery ta very much!

I've decided depending on how quickly the clinic gets back to me that I won't be starting IVF until at least February. This last 12 months has been a proper ordeal and I feel that I've lost who I am. I'm trapped in a job I hate to get NHS maternity benefits and I've put so much on hold that it's ridiculous. I think Primmer said a few pages back that life's too short. It bloody well is and I'm fed up of putting things off so I'm going skiing in January. I'm so relaxed when I'm skiing- it makes me feel so at peace, like how some people must feel in cathedrals. OH has arranged for us to go to a foster meeting tonight as well. Maybe they'll allow us to start the long process pre-IVF. It'll be good to find out about our options though. I've wanted to foster for yonks- another sodding infertility steal.

Hope you don't mind me coming back. I'm trying desperately to just get stronger with this stuff.

Hope you're all ok. xx

Loveactually

Hugs for everyone feeling down. I hope code monkeys wish come true for everyone.

6 embies is good news WW. Praying that everything goes well for you.

All the best with your healthy eating and gym plan angel treats.

Afm, still recovering from laparoscopy done on 26th did anybody had a laparoscopy done before. How much time did it take for you to recover to normal. I m in bed with all needed things arranged beside the bed by my DH before he went to work along with my trusty iPad and some novels.

codemonkey

haha tcd, I just bought a pair of those insoles. Lets hope they arrive before the appointment. Haven eaten like a pig this week, and gained back the 5lbs I lost last week, I doubt I'll sneak in under the BMI thingy though. It's good to see you back.

teaandcakeordeath

Loveactually wrote: »

Afm, still recovering from laparoscopy done on 26th did anybody had a laparoscopy done before. How much time did it take for you to recover to normal. I m in bed with all needed things arranged beside the bed by my DH before he went to work along with my trusty iPad and some novels.

I had a lap back in 2008. I was fine within about 3 days but they did warn me I could have pain in my shoulder for up to a week (something about the CO2 they pump into you moving around, usually to the shoulder) I was told not to work for a week though (lifting etc.) They didn't do anything in there, just had a snoop around mind so not sure if it's comparable to what you had (if they removed adhesions etc.)

Great minds eh code? They do ones with a 2 inch lift but I think my foot would look insane and not at all convincing... I couldn't work out what shoes I'd get away with wearing them with either- maybe some f-uggs...

Part_Mouse

TCOD lovely to hear from you, soundslike some me time is very much in order.

Loveactually, no experienceim afrai, hugs to you though and hope your feeling better soon.

I can't get hold of FS, just check and have around 20 days to ov, need to stop bleeding first.