9 year old girl sharing bed with dad

meer53

My daughter who is 13 sometimes sleeps with her Dad when she stays at his. It doesn't bother me at all. He's her Dad, they watch TV in bed, they fall asleep, can't see the problem.

I agree, it's not your business, why did you feel the need to mention it ?

spacey2012

Wonder if he knows this "friend" is discussing his life on a public forum.

tinkerbell28

Sounds more like a disgruntled ex to me. Who wants pick faults to tar the Dad with anything "inappropriate" no matter how serious the suggestion.

I can't see a friend thinking, "oh my god, my friend must be having a sexual/inappropriate relationship with his daughter".

Then saying so, and posting it online, in the hope of back up I presume.

From something so normal.

Seanymph

Blimey what a nasty question to ask.

My daughter is 19 and got into bed with my OH and I the other night when she had a row with her b/f. She didn't sleep the night because even though it's a huge bed we are just too big now! But she's my baby.

And this baby is close and secure with her father. And long may that continue.

To many men are restrained and scared to show their female children love and affection and unrestrained contact now - and because of snidey unnecessary hurtful comments like this.

I hope you never mention it to this man again, and you do nothing further to deny this lucky girl the attention and security she deserves and obviously gets from her daddy at the weekend.

As for 'when' - well, 'when the daughter no longer feels comfortable'. SHE will set HER boundaries with HER father and I would hope she does it without reference to anyone else.

peachyprice

chipsdog wrote: »

What do all your wise people think about this, someone I know is divorced, he has his daughter to stay over at his house, but, she shares a bed with him - I don't think this is right, but, when I mentioned it to him he just laughed at me, what do you all think?

Jesus christ, it's his daughter, NOT EVERY MAN IS A PED0.

Errata

peachyprice wrote: »

Jesus christ, it's his daughter, NOT EVERY MAN IS A PED0.

That's very true, but many adult males, and that includes dads, wake up in the morning with a stiffy. How can that be explained to a nine year old girl next to him in his bed?

peachyprice

Errata wrote: »

That's very true, but many adult males, and that includes dads, wake up in the morning with a stiffy. How can that be explained to a nine year old girl next to him in his bed?

Unless he's sleeping naked how is she going to even know? It is possible for a man to get out of bed without the need to wave his tackle around the room.

Jennifer_Jane

I had to sleep in the same room as my parents. Not in the same bed. After an inappropriate remark made by my father one morning about my body, I asked my mother to change the sleeping arrangements and I then slept in the same bed (the double) as her, and my father and brother slept in twin beds in another room.

I will always be grateful to my mother for her handling of this.

I hope this girl is OK, and has sufficient self-confidence in the remote possibility that an unconsidered remark is made as she grows up, to deal with it.

In my view, a sleeper sofa in the sitting room would be better.

fluffnutter

paulineb wrote: »

No I know its not

But possibly the dad might be better getting a sofa bed for the girl to discourage people who want to tattle about it.

And thats a bit sad, but you never know who might find out and want to try and cause trouble.

If we all modified our behaviour just in case people 'find out' and 'tattle', then no one would ever do anything.

You live your life for yourself, not for the neighbours.

mustmakealist

I think I would be far more concerned if sharing a bed with her father was a 'secret'. Otherwise I wouldn't bother.