Staying in a hotel when visiting friends

Bella73

I'm another odd one who would prefer to stay in a hotel from choice and we don't have a spare room, there is a travel lodge down the road :rotfl:

I just prefer to give people space and I like my own space without feeling that I'm in the way or waiting for them to surface. When younger I crashed at people's houses for the odd night but really prefer my privacy as I've got a little older. But I find it really weird that people get so offended by it.

Torry_Quine

Person_one wrote: »

It would be gracious (and Christian?) of you to forgive them, let it go and be understanding when people aren't perfectly behaved at a time of stress and high emotion.

I have let it go, this was some time ago! They have been forgiven now.

Tiddlywinks wrote: »

Might they have had other things on their minds at the time... like a sick relative?

Have already expalined about this.

Funky_Bold_Ribena

Torry_Quine wrote: »

To me it would be polite to say 'Thanks for the offer but we'd rather stay in a hotel because .....', rather than stay in a hotel and not even say they were in town. This despite the fact that I visited several times before they arrived and between their visits, (although I only found out when they were around later)

Because whatever they say you will find fault with. Face it, they just aren't into you.

Torry_Quine

Funky_Bold_Ribena wrote: »

Because whatever they say you will find fault with. Face it, they just aren't into you.

If they'd said 'thanks but we'll make alternative arrangements' then at least I'd know that my home wasn't for them which is their choice. Obviously I know not to invite them again!

Funky_Bold_Ribena

Torry_Quine wrote: »

If they'd said 'thanks but we'll make alternative arrangements' then at least I'd know that my home wasn't for them which is their choice. Obviously I know not to invite them again!

Exactly. You are taking it so personally. Why would they respond to your offers all the time, it's all very unnerving. Let it go. Let them go. Let them do what they want without making such a fuss all the time.

Torry_Quine

Funky_Bold_Ribena wrote: »

Exactly. You are taking it so personally. Why would they respond to your offers all the time, it's all very unnerving. Let it go. Let them go. Let them do what they want without making such a fuss all the time.

It isn't all the time though it was the one time and as I said I haven't offered again. Of course I took it personally.

System

I wwouldn't mind, cosidering i currently live in a bedsit there isn't exactly room anyway :eek:

I also hate staying at people's houses, i much prefer a nice comfy bed, where i can go to sleep whenever i want, and wake up whenever i want, where i can escape to if it gets too much, where i can treat myself to a bath (dont have one at home so its a luxury!) and where...i can...um..have privacy with my bf . Is nohing personal i just hate staying at people's houses.

This_Year

I would always prefer to stay in a hotel than someone's house. I like the being able to say, "We're off, see you around lunchtime tomorrow" (for example) and then be able to go and watch tv or read in my hotel room and just chill with the freedom to have a bath without wondering if I'm taking all the hot water etc.

I don't want to disturb people's morning routines nor do I want my privacy invaded; also I am not really a people person first thing preferring just to drink my cuppa while I get ready for the day and not have to engage in chit chat.

I have stayed with family before but on the whole have felt vaguely uncomfortable because of the above and glad to go home.

bitemebankers

Torry_Quine wrote: »

So it's judgemental to expect common courtesy from other people!

I refer not to your attitude on this thread, but rather the very conservative, homophobic and transphobic attitudes you've displayed over the last several years on this forum.

All I needed was to be informed that they wouldn't be taking up my offer.

I suspect they feel quite awkward about the whole thing and felt it was just easier to stay in a hotel rather than explain exactly why they don't want to stay with you. For what it's worth, I have relatives that hold similar, very "conservative" attitudes to yourself and I (and other members of the family) tend to give them a wide berth.

liney

I think the fact they 'didn't even acknowledge the offer,' was a pretty definately 'we're not coming.'

Some people will ignore parts of conversations to avoid possible confrontation, or saying no. They never led you to believe they would be staying, by the sounds of it.