Woulld you expect ex partner to have a school uniform?

JimmyTheWig

OP, I think you will be understood better by a section of people on this thread if you confirm that you understand that...

1. Whoever provides the money for a sixth uniform has no impact on the general arrangements of how the Monday morning uniform and your son are in the same place on a Monday morning.
2. Whoever goes to the shop to buy a sixth uniform has no impact on the general arrangements of how the Monday morning uniform and your son are in the same place on a Monday morning.
3. Whoever's house the new sixth uniform starts at has no impact on the general arrangements (i.e. after that first week) of how the Monday morning uniform and your son are in the same place on a Monday morning.


Once you have confirmed that you understand that, could you also explain how you think it would help your son if there was a sixth uniform?

jellyhead

springdreams wrote: »

Ah I see ...

Well if Dad has now taken to fetching the son from his mum on Friday, the issue of loads to cart around is resolved for the son

That's ideal really :T He can take any uniform etc. that he needs with him without having to cart it around on the bus

jellyhead

If I've got this wrong I'm happy to be corrected, but is this a possibility to do things this way ...

Whatever non-uniform clothes he is wearing on Sunday get left at his Dad's house for Dad to wash. On Monday he puts on his uniform and goes to school.

On Thursday he goes to Dad's for tea. He changes out of his dirty uniform into the Sunday clothes that his Dad has washed, and leaves his dirty uniform at Dad's so that Dad can wash it for Monday.

Repeat with whatever clothes he takes with him over the weekend.

jellyhead

Claire212 wrote: »

He will pick his son up every Friday to make sure he has it! And for this, I have absolutely no comeback. If my son is present then yes, his uniform must go with him.

Well, it's a solution, isn't it? If there are 5 uniforms then I don't see a problem.

I'm another one who buys 4 or 5 uniforms for each child. I am usually happy to wear my clothes for 2 days, but not if I have exercised and sweated on them the way that children sweat when running around a playground pretending to be Batman.

Also, mine are clumsy with their food and drink, pens, paint, glitter etc. I don't really get the earlier comment (not by OP) about them not needing so many unless they have special needs. Some children get their clothes messy regardless of whether they have special needs or not. Some children are sweaty. Some just prefer to wear clean clothes. The classrooms are still absolutely boiling at the moment.

brenda10

Claire212 wrote: »

Despite trying to arrange an alternative my son is still having to spend a night at his Dads where he has to attend school the next day.

My son is coming home after school, changing and then catching the bus to his Grandparents where his Dad will pick him up later. Taking his school bag with him.

His Dad has told him that he needs to bring his uniform with him so that he can change into it.

I have told him that he should realy make arrangements to buy his own. He is furious. Claiming that as he pays maintenance, £96 a month, he should come already provided with one.

He has stayed the night before (Thurday) but we are changing it to a Sunday, so he has gone straight from school already in his uniform before and obviously will again if his Dad really insists he will not buy him one.

I just think if they say they want to have them overnight on a school night then they should provide them with a uniform clean and ready to go. Which we will return to him on the Thursday when he goes round for tea and we pick him up.

Is it unreasonable (as he says) to even ask?

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Yes I believe as your partner pays maintenance and only has your child 1 night per week you are entitled to supply the uniform and why not! I am a mother and would expect if I was in this situation I would be providing a uniform, yes it is unreasonable of you not to send the uniform with your child even if it is a sunday.

Don't engage with him, seems like he is a control freak and money is important to him, he is using the contact with your son to torment you, don't give him the satisfaction, it will annoy him to see you happy, keep happy, live your life and ignore him as much as possible. Good Luck xx

poet123

jellyhead wrote: »

Well, it's a solution, isn't it? If there are 5 uniforms then I don't see a problem.

I'm another one who buys 4 or 5 uniforms for each child. I am usually happy to wear my clothes for 2 days, but not if I have exercised and sweated on them the way that children sweat when running around a playground pretending to be Batman.

Also, mine are clumsy with their food and drink, pens, paint, glitter etc. I don't really get the earlier comment (not by OP) about them not needing so many unless they have special needs. Some children get their clothes messy regardless of whether they have special needs or not. Some children are sweaty. Some just prefer to wear clean clothes. The classrooms are still absolutely boiling at the moment.

You can still ensure they have clean clothes daily with a set of two or three uniforms.

candygirl

poet123 wrote: »

You can still ensure they have clean clothes daily with a set of two or three uniforms.

A lot of my pupils were lucky to have one set of uniform, and most of them were from split families!!:(

jellyhead

poet123 wrote: »

You can still ensure they have clean clothes daily with a set of two or three uniforms.

You can, but I found myself struggling to dry it in time last year after gaining an extra family member so I bought a 4th set. We live in a tiny 2-bed house and there are 5 of us. There aren't many radiators and not many places to put an airer up. My friends who have a dining room or a conservatory or whatever downstairs find it easier to dry clothes. Some have room in a bedroom for an airer. I have those things that hook over radiators over the bedroom doors but it's still a bit of a struggle in winter when I can't dry outside and he needs a clean sweatshirt every day. The school sweatshirts have narrow cuffs etc. and my boy has a massive head and large wrists, so I need to air dry the jumpers and stretch the cuffs every so often to enlarge them. Tumble drying would be an option for children who aren't gigantic.

If he wasn't so sweaty and messy he could wear clothes for more than 1 day. I wear most of mine for a second day.