Smoking guest - WWYD?

itsanne

It beggars belief what some people think they should get away with - and did in this case. The poor hosts have probably spent the time since thinking of all the ways they would rather have dealt with the [STRIKE]a***hole[/STRIKE] situation but were too shocked to think of at the time.

With any luck tales of the [STRIKE] a***hole's[/STRIKE] guest's behaviour will now spread before him and he won't be invited to anything else. Hopefully he'll also become aware of the story doing the rounds, though whether he'd be bothered is another thing.

My son has used electronic cigarettes. He's not allowed to smoke normal cigarettes (or anything else!) in our house, but we did allow the electronic ones, if only to encourage him to use them rather than cigarettes if he had to smoke something. They do give off a slight smell, but it's nothing like a cigarette and it dissipates quickly. I would be wary of allowing them around children, though. Apart from anything else, the smell is often like sweets so would be more likely to be of interest to them.

claire16c

scooby088 wrote: »

If the person smoking was a relative then I would say that those who invited him should have made him aware of the no smoking rule first, however he was right to say that they knew he smoked and shouldn't have invited him. It's not the smokers fault for the lack of information. But as a smoker I would have automatically gone outside anyway in the rain.

I don't think most smokers would be happy for not being invited anywhere!

Lack of information? Lol

It's called common courtesy & the bleedin obvious.

chunkychocky

I expect they didn't specifically ask him not to have a w@nk in the middle of the lounge too, but also probably felt it was unnecessary to specify. Why should they feel the need to specify that they don't want him to behave anti-socially?!

For goodness sake the guy is obviously just an arrogant prat who believes he can do what, when and where he wants without any consideration to anyone else.

System

My husband doesn't smoke in the house and he'd be damned if he'd let anyone else smoke in the house either. I'm quite happy to carry out his wishes if anyone comes to the house. He smokes in the veranda. When his mate comes to stay theres two of them puffing away in the veranda with a tiny ash tray (I hate ash trays disgusting things).

claire16c

chunkychocky wrote: »

I expect they didn't specifically ask him not to have a w@nk in the middle of the lounge too, but also probably felt it was unnecessary to specify. Why should they feel the need to specify that they don't want him to behave anti-socially?!

For goodness sake the guy is obviously just an arrogant prat who believes he can do what, when and where he wants without any consideration to anyone else.

:rotfl:

Maybe a new line of party invitations could be created for these idiots who apparently need prior warnings.

scooby088

Whilst I agree with every other poster here I can see both sides and am not blinded by my anger against smoking or smokers.

I smoke in my house so would it be reasonable to throw a non smoker out who voiced their opposition to smoking in my house? Or threaten being physical with them if the persisted being a total prat.

[Deleted User]

scooby088 wrote: »

Whilst I agree with every other poster here I can see both sides and am not blinded by my anger against smoking or smokers.

I smoke in my house so would it be reasonable to throw a non smoker out who voiced their opposition to smoking in my house? Or threaten being physical with them if the persisted being a total prat.

But its not the same though. If you choose to smoke in your house, that's your perogative. If a visitor complains about it, its your choice to continue or explain to them if they aren't happy they are free to leave.

However in this case, the chap concerned was a guest, so it wasn't his place to dictate anything.

Edwardia

We don't smoke and don't know anyone who does so no prob for us.

jackyann

I am very interested in these replies, as I have observed the changing attitudes to smoking (and views on the duty of hospitality) over 60 years.

I realised as well that I recently gave a large party for people who had been very helpful to my family - there were about 50-60 guests. I had not even thought about "warning" smokers, but mercifully no-one even asked if they could light up.

I also think that it sounds as if there is history between the "guest" and hosts.

What I have found most difficult over the years is the arrogance of some smokers. One of my sons had friends who smoked and they never lit up at my home or even asked to - my son had told them it was unacceptable. They were present when someone (a passing acquaintance who had called to pick something up) lit up without asking. I would have probably let it go - he was unlikely to have called again and he wasn't someone I wanted to confront (tedious & annoying, not threatening). But because those other boys had always been so polite, I felt obliged to ask him to put his cigarette out!

Rowingirl

scooby088 wrote: »

Whilst I agree with every other poster here I can see both sides and am not blinded by my anger against smoking or smokers.

I smoke in my house so would it be reasonable to throw a non smoker out who voiced their opposition to smoking in my house? Or threaten being physical with them if the persisted being a total prat.

Threatening anyone with violence is unreasonable in either situation (yours & the OP's).

In the OP the host asked a guest to stop smoking inside their house, there was no lecture on the evils of smoking. The guest declined to go outside and then twisted good manners to make themselves look the like the injured party and the host appear to be unreasonable.