Friend sold presents on eBay

rossireps

catmiaow wrote: »

Yeah I said that because it shows she isn't poor, me and my husband both work and can't afford to go out and on holiday as much as she does. The gifts are stopping now.

I agree Id be hurt about the gifts,as for a holiday thats non of your business really

aliasojo

catmiaow wrote: »

The holiday is one she has every year to visit her death row bf family, the bf she has never met.

Imo, this comment is completely unnecessary to this thread and perhaps illustrates why your user name is so apt.

A gift is just that, a gift. It is not something that automatically comes with a certain amount of obligation or duty. If the person does not want to keep the gift for whatever reason then it is their right to do with it as they see fit.

There could be a number of reasons why your friend does not keep your gifts, none of us can give you insight on that.

Talk to her about it, in a calm and friendly way.

Note the word talk....not confront....and not using FB.

poet123

It is not that much different to recycling gifts and I suspect many of us do that!! Once given they are the recipients, to do with as they wish.

mrcol1000

Its a bit of shock but who hasn't sold unwanted presents on Ebay?

Either leave it and not buy her anything else or just give her vouchers. Or if you really can't leave it then confront her in a nice way and ask her if there is something wrong with the presents as you saw them for sale on Ebay and if she would prefer something else?

Really though like other people have said the presents are hers. Does she really collect them or does everyone think she does so she gets loads of them even though she doesn't like them? Maybe she needs the money? Maybe she is having a sort out? She obviously though doesn't want them and so you need to rethink what if anything to buy her.

jacques_chirac

catmiaow wrote: »

The holiday is one she has every year to visit her death row bf family, the bf she has never met.

No I post them to her via courier or if we meet up then we exchange but I haven't seen her for a while as its usually me making the effort so put my foot down now.

Like I said they are items she collects so would think she likes them. If she didn't like them I would rather she was either honest with me and then gave them to charity but selling them is just a kick in the teeth to me honest.

Ever heard the phrase 'she's not that into you'? I'm sure your gifts are well intentioned, but you come across as a little obsessive and controlling. I would also question why you are checking her ebay sales?

(Just read further and realised you are a woman - from what you had said I thought you were a bit of a stalker who wanted to be her boyfriend!)

poet123

jacques_chirac wrote: »

Ever heard the phrase 'she's not that into you'? I'm sure your gifts are well intentioned, but you come across as a little obsessive and controlling. I would also question why you are checking her ebay sales?

(Just read further and realised you are a woman - from what you had said I thought you were a bit of a stalker who wanted to be her boyfriend!)

I wondered that too.

Goldiegirl

mrcol1000 wrote: »

Its a bit of shock but who hasn't sold unwanted presents on Ebay?

.

Exactly. I've sold several things on eBay that were given to me, like an excess of toiletry gift packs, clothes that aren't quite me, and things I don't really need.

Once the things are given to someone, the giver no longer has any rights over them - it's up to the person who has been given the present to do what they want with it.

Of course, in this case the presents are handmade, so that implies that a lot of effort has gone into it, so I can understand why the OP is upset.

But the simple answer is, stop doing it. The presents don't seem to be appreciated, and you are no longer getting any pleasure from given the presents.

Strapped

catmiaow wrote: »

The holiday is one she has every year to visit her death row bf family, the bf she has never met.

No I post them to her via courier or if we meet up then we exchange but I haven't seen her for a while as its usually me making the effort so put my foot down now.

Like I said they are items she collects so would think she likes them. If she didn't like them I would rather she was either honest with me and then gave them to charity but selling them is just a kick in the teeth to me honest.

OK, you had me until this point.

Torry_Quine

I would be highly offended if a gift ended up on e-bay but as I never go on there I would only find out if someone told me.

I would never sell something given to me , presents are something special.

catmiaow

rossireps wrote: »

I agree Id be hurt about the gifts,as for a holiday thats non of your business really

Someone asked why she takes the holiday, I was explaining why and basically saying she isn't selling the stuff because she is short of a few bob.