Husband's ex wife wanting more money

gabycat

My son is 7 and going back to school he needed 3 x school jumpers @ £9.50 each
3 x school polo shirts @ £7.50 each
4 pairs trousers £16 from Tesco
New shoes £40
New school bag £10
Packed lunch bag £5
Rainy day activity book£3.50
Total £125.50


He can wear plain polos and jumpers but 95% of the school don't.


He will need a new jacket soon as well.


While I don't agree the ops OH should pay all costs , it is not hard to spend £150 on new uniform, shoes etc.

lostinrates

tinkerbell28 wrote: »

Just give you an idea...£150 is roughly what I spent on 3 children....which included 3 pairs of kickers....by shopping about.

Or could be a pair of school schools, a pair of football boots and a pair of good trainers....many of which give little change for fifty pounds. (Or did when I last needed them for me years and years ago!)

At twelve the boy could have started that inexorable growing that they suddenly seem to do and budgeting might be harder than it has been ion the past....

Especially if the ex and his new wife have suggested in their purchases her clothing and shoe provisions have not been sufficient ....

Not suggesting she is right necessarily, just looking at another perspective.

ska_lover

OP, it really does sound like your husband is being more than generous - surely this is the kind of expense that £450 a month should be covering?

sunflower_2

sounds like she has the neck of a giraffe !!!

is it really about the money tho?
or is she the type just to kick up a fuss and cause trouble now and then?

i think your hubby needs to be saying

"the £450 a month is for ***'s clothing. if you dont have any money to buy his uniform at the minute, i will of course get him it, but will have to take it out of next month's maintenance. if so, can you please give me a list of what he needs?"


awkward situation to be in - but her silly and greedy demands need to be nipped right in the bud !

exarmydreamer

Guest101 wrote: »

Ok, strange, but not unheard of, i presume then he got equal assets elsewhere? Might just want to check the judgment of divorce

Possible divorce agreement to ex wife not receiving benefit from his pension,shares bank balance, Rolex watch who knows but I fully understand where your coming from OP, I'm with you on this one.

mgdavid

she's testing the water - trying it on.
Tell her to take a runner... politely

Melaniep101

Big thanks to everyone for your comments - I really do appreciate it. Just wanted to make sure I wasn't over reacting here, seems like most are in agreement that the ex is taking the proverbial!

Just to clarify, re the house that she lives in - She has been a SAHM since DSS was born and they (my hub) bought the house. He decided not to make her sell the house when they divorced because he didn't want to turf his boy out of his bedroom. I agree that hubby seems a bit soft, but he is a kind and generous man, but it seems like the ex is taking full advantage of that.

Thanks again everyone!

liney

She has know about this for 12 months. It is not an unexpected expense.

As long as you are paying the required 15% then I would not be paying extra.

In order to not be the bad guy, could he offer an advance on next month's payment?

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

A senior school uniform for DD2 cost

Blazer - £45 (had to be from the school)
Jumper - £25 (had to be from the school)
Tie - £12 (had to be from the school)
Shortsleeved PE top - £22 (had to be from the school)
Shorts - £12 (had to be from the school)
Longsleeved PE top - £27 (had to be from the school)
Long socks for PE - £12 a pair (had to be from the school)

Boot bag for PE - £7 (had to be from the school)
Holdall for PE - £17 (had to be from the school)

Set of nametapes in house colours - £8 (had to be from the school)

School skirt - £22.50 (had to be from the school)



The only things that could be bought cheaper were the shirts, normal socks (well, knee length black ones, which always cost more than a packet of 5 pairs of ankle socks) and shoes.


Kitting out a secondary school pupil is nothing like kitting out a 4 year old.

paulineb_2

Not every school insists on buying the uniform from the school though. Back in the mists of time when I went to school, we had to buy a school blazer, not from the school though, but where the shirts, skirts, shoes, tights, socks, pe tops and shorts came from was entirely the parents choice.

And Im aware some schools will stipulate that, but others wont. Anyone I know who is at secondary school in my area, its no different to when I was there, almost 30 years ago, the uniform is much the same, you buy a certain colour of blazer and sew the badge on yourself and as long as people adhere to the dress code, it matters not whether the skirts or trousers are from asda or elsewhere.

Bottom line is though, this woman gets 450 quid a month from the OP, its not like she gets no maintenance for the kid at all.