Those who are waiting to TTC (New Thread)

Miss_Bolan

Hi ladies

well, tomorrow it will officially be the last week of march, and I am soon to be migrating off this board on to my 'ttc' journey. A friend who got married a week before me had her first child at the weekend and it's been lovely to see her pics and hope that this time next year that might be me!

Im having a bit of a down day today though. My husband has been rowing with his ex, which always stresses me out. It's the same old turf we've been over a hundred times before, but it makes me anxious and plays on my mind. I worry about how things will be when I do have a child of my own, my husbands ex and us have very different views on the world (partly why they are ex I suppose!), his ex judges everything on money i.e. If you don't spend enough on your kids you are a bad parent. Money and posessions aren't really how I judge happiness. But I know when we have a child she will throw it back constantly and I worry so much about it... It takes away from my excitement sometimes.

sorry, I know im being a bit moany, just having a worried day today and feeling unsettled and emotional (hey maybe it means my hormones are working after I came off my pill!)

Sethisis

Miss Bolan, Why should you care what a person you don't like thinks of you? Thinking that money isn't the way to measure happiness is absolutely the right way to think!

The hormones are likely to be messing with you right now, but go and enjoy TTC!

Trixsie - having a project does help doesn't it? Are you getting the same thing where you want to immerse yourself in baby related stuff, but know you're just torturing yourself really?

Jonesy88

Miss Bolan, please dont feel guilty for your view. Money doesn't equal happiness or love.

AFM, AF is here and we're thing of starting our TTC journey in May, that means only another period away! It sounds much closer when i think of it like that.

JellyBox

Miss Bolan, don't let her opinion worry you, money can't buy happiness, or love, and the things that you provide will be far more important. Also, yay for hormones and everything working!

Trixsie1989

Sethisis - yes that's how I feel exactly! So making things for my friend is doing a good and bad job at the same time, really wish I was making this stuff for our child not here's but hey oh just gotta get on with it. We start making things for our wedding next week aswell so that's another task to keep me busy I guess. I know I have lots of wonderful things going on in my life right now and September really isn't that far away but I just wish it was happening a bit sooner xxx

Trixsie1989

Miss bolas she sounds very shallow, enjoy your ttc journey hopefully we all won't be too far behind you don't let her worry you which I know is easier said than done just do what you feel is right and what makes you and oh happy xxx

Miss_Bolan

Thanks ladies, I really appreciate your replies.

The whole step-parenting/seperated families thing can be challenging. In no other type of relationship would you have to hear so often what your husbands ex thinks of your partner/you/your life!

I shouldnt let it get to me but when we hear the whole 'youre a bad father because you don't give me enough money/you left your kids/youre a bad dad' etc for the thousandth time it gets very tiring. She thinks if she doesnt buy all their clothes from next and send them on every holiday/activity that school offers and spend £100s of pounds on their birthday parties and presents then it is bad parenting and unfair on the kids. She thinks if we say no it's because we are being selfish and she makes my husband feel like a crap dad, when actually there is normally another reason (we can't afford it, or think its not necessary).

I just hate seeing my husband upset and being made to feel like we are so bad. We have always supported financially and had the kids as often as she would agree, and yet nothing is good enough, it always boils down to money. I know when we have a child we will have less money and I know it will get harder with her. She will blame our 'new child' and I know will start accusing my husband of leaving his kids for his 'new family' which will never be the case, but I dread her sayung those things and putting those thoughts in my husbanzd and stepkids heads.

Kira000

Hi everyone. Just sticking my toe in the water! Had our DD just over two years ago, and we would like to give her a little brother or sister. We are at a point when we are ready to start again, but we've have had to wait till finances allow before we start TTC. Thanks to some extra cash just come my way from work, i've now got enough to cover mat leave so we could start TTC. Problem is if we start now, we will end up with two lots of childcare for too long until DD goes to school, so i think we are probably waiting till end of summer unless we get some more money to pay for the extra childcare.
Can't risk waiting too long as i'm getting on a bit (38 nearly 39), plus i am very broody as my SIL has just announced she is pg with twins!
In the meanwhile, I've recently starting testing with OV strips, and i've managed to catch my OV peak. About to start on the pregnacare tablets as well.
Keeping me occupied in the interim is DD, never a moment with a toddler about! I am worried about how i'd cope pregnant with a toddler as i had a rotten pregnancy last time with sickness, heartburn and then hip pain! The joys!
Anyway, looking forward to getting to know you all in the coming months!

RebekahR

Kira! We were pregnant the same time ;-) I think I was about 12 weeks when you gave birth!

Kira000

Hi Rebekah! Yes, i remember you very well! You were on the 12week thread, while i was lurking around waiting to pop! Think you may have been on TTC with me as well?!

Be lovely to start our TTC and hopefully PG journeys together!:D