Fathers Day - am I being unreasonable?

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  • balletshoes
    balletshoes Posts: 16,610 Forumite
    "The kids do their own thing and get bribed given sweets, cakes and stuff." Why can't they do that somewhere else then? Why do they have to do it in a religious framework? They're presumably young enough not to question it - perfect targets for the all-controlling church. ;)

    Of course they can do it somewhere else - I'm guessing its done in this particular religious framework to make it a fun hour or so for the kids?

    FWIW, my siblings and I went to church with my mum every Sunday, my Dad didn't want to so he didn't. Sunday School was stories to me, it didn't brainwash me (or any of the kids I went to Sunday school with), didn't make me want to spread the word or anything. I went for years because my mum wanted us to. I no longer follow any religion, my OH is a fairweather variety of a different religion, and my daughter has no religion.

    My years in Sunday School were, to me, basically an hour a week listening to stories, drawing, colouring in, then we left and went off and had some fun altogether as a family with mum and dad. It has left no lasting impression apart from boredom to be honest.
  • Lagoon
    Lagoon Posts: 934 Forumite
    Ah, but you were a gifted child, weren't you?

    I don't know if that makes much of a difference. I think at that age, children are questioning other imaginary creatures...is it that unusual to question the existence of a God at around the same age?

    Perhaps I'm wrong, but the way I see it is that anyone old enough to realise Santa doesn't exist can probably apply reasoning to religion as well.

    Admittedly, it's a little more in-depth as there's a book involved, but I think with the influence of one religious and one non-religious parent the OP's children will at least have considered an alternative viewpoint if they're that age.
  • balletshoes
    balletshoes Posts: 16,610 Forumite
    Paddles wrote: »
    I think you should go. Two of my children go to church ...
    One of my other daughter who seems to believe in biscuits went for a while for the biscuits but soon tired of it....

    :rotfl::rotfl: now that made me laugh Paddles :T.
  • poet123
    poet123 Posts: 24,099 Forumite
    Why does mum get to take them? If she's so sure her views are right, surely she should let her children come to it in their own way?

    The OP accepts it, and the children enjoy it, who is anyone else to tell him to "put his foot down"? How archaic is that?

    The kids may well move away from it in time, but they will have had the exposure to it to make an informed choice.
  • kelpie35
    kelpie35 Posts: 1,781 Forumite
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker First Post
    OP do you attend plays that are put on in school etc. I know the school stuff might not be religious but try to think along these lines and that will get you through.

    Try to be proud of your children and be happy they are participating in something they enjoy.
  • mcfisco
    mcfisco Posts: 1,955 Forumite
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker
    Can't just go to keep your kids happy whilst quietly chanting "hail Satan"?

    That would cover the enjoying your kids on Father's Day bit and at the same time inoculating yourself from the God stuff?

    :)
    I have long known that it is part of God's plan for me to spend a little time with each of the most stupid people on earth.
  • Paddles
    Paddles Posts: 106 Forumite
    :rotfl::rotfl: now that made me laugh Paddles :T.
    :cool: she's an odd child, mind you son's her sister, who thinks her Nan died because she didn't see her for a while, and then when she did decided to stick with that theory but that Hanna had come back to life... I'm not sure if I fear for their sanity or mine more :-)
    Save £12K 2013 #54 - £4625/£15k
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  • mummyroysof3
    mummyroysof3 Posts: 4,566 Forumite
    Try to look at it the same way as school activities and visiting family members you aren't keen on....grit ya teeth and get through it then go home and have a beer :beer:
    Have a Bsc Hons open degree from the Open University 2015 :j:D:eek::T
  • Deanied
    Deanied Posts: 405 Forumite
    I think your partner is selfish. She is putting her religion before you. She could have told the Sunday school leaders weeks ago that your children wouldn't be part of the service as they would be spending the time with you, but chose not to in order to manipulate you into attending church.

    I'm sure if you arranged for the kids to do something on Mothering Sunday, which meant she would have to miss church, she would not be happy.
  • balletshoes
    balletshoes Posts: 16,610 Forumite
    Deanied wrote: »
    I think your partner is selfish. She is putting her religion before you. She could have told the Sunday school leaders weeks ago that your children wouldn't be part of the service as they would be spending the time with you, but chose not to in order to manipulate you into attending church.

    I'm sure if you arranged for the kids to do something on Mothering Sunday, which meant she would have to miss church, she would not be happy.

    How long does a Sunday church service take, in your experience? In mine, its an hour at the most, usually shorter when there are children's performances involved, and its over before noon. The OP isn't missing Fathers Day with his family, he's missing one hour of Fathers Day with his family, if he chooses not to go to church and see his kids in their performance?
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