Am I over reacting? Think I might explode if I dont talk about this

chelseablue

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Pixiechic

Are you sure that he's not joking? I just can't believe that he would spend your birthday present money at the pub :eek:

When did he tell you this?

heartbreak_star

Was it money he put aside or was he given it to buy you a present?

Have a hug you poor thing!

HBS x

zzzLazyDaisy

Firstly, are you sure he's not just teasing you, and has actually spent the money on a surprise for you? £150 seems to be a lot of money to spend at the pub.

But if that really is the case, to be honest I would be heartbroken, as I would take it as an indication that he thinks more about himself and his mates and having a good time, than he does about showing care and commitment to me. I suppose, though, I'd have to stop and ask myself whether this is indicative of a general 'couldn't care less' attitude towards me, or is he loving and generous in other ways?

Whatever, the fact is it doesn't matter whether anyone on here would be upset, clearly YOU are, and you need to sit down and be honest with yourself about why you are upset, and then have an open and honest chat with your OH.

tea_lover

How do you know he had the money, and how much he had, and what it was for?? It almost reads as if you gave him the money!

ETA: FWIW, my OH cleared off to watch football on my 30th and I didnt even get a card. He then sulked for 2 weeks as apparently it was unreasonable of me to be annoyed.

Lilly11a

That's more of less exactly what my ex did 3 years ago. He was on incapacity benefit ( and still is now) and I'd given him £80 to top up gas and electric leaving around £40 ish spare.

Couldn't even be bothered to get me a card- really upset me. Have to say it did take me another 2 years to finish it .

pops5588

I don't think that you are over-reacting at all.

IMO it isn't about the presents, it's a day that is meant to be earmarked as being one of the few occasions that the people you love are meant to make a bit of an effort to show how much they love and care about you. If it were me I would be questioning how much he can actually really care then?

Hopefully he has some other money somewhere that you don't know about that he has set aside to treat you.

But for the record I would be pretty hurt too.

TeamLowe

sorry, if it's his money then what way was it set aside to buy your presents? or do you mean he had £150 left til payday out of which he had to buy your presents?

either way it's a horrible thing and i sincerely hope he's just trying to trick you so your presents will be a suprise.
if it's as you say then if it was me he'd be sleeping on the green carpet outside x

chelseablue

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paulineb_2

Im assuming that he might have more money by the time next week comes around? Or was that it.

Tbh, it doesnt matter what people spend on my birthday and Im older than you and then some, Im over 40.

If someone spent a fiver on me, Id be happy, I probably wouldnt be comfortable with someone spending £150 on me no matter what birthday it was to be honest.

I would wait and see what happens on your birthday and talk to him after that if you feel you still need to.

chelseablue

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