How can I fix this?

victory

tayforth wrote: »

I was just about to post the same thing. The OP may never come back to this thread, but it's had over 9,000 views already.

I'm willing to bet that a lot of lurkers on this thread are in a similar situation. And if it's helped even one of them, then it's been very worthwhile.


Hugs to anyone who's reading this and going through the same thing xxx

tayforth is right a thread like this one comes up over and over again and I reckon there are lurkers reading, noticing that there are similarities within their relationships and waiting to see what has been posted and the outcome....

anon you could be helping an awful lot of people but by deleting you have made some of them go back into their lives, themselves, please stand up for yourself and be strong and make a difference for you and others

paulineb_2

Judi wrote: »

Ive said it before and i'll say it again. The only way to handle a bully is to either stand up to him or leave. Me, i will fight till the cows come home.:D

I wish it were that simple. Many people dont have anywhere to go. Its sometimes impossible to stand up to people and not get more abuse. I'll fight my corner every time as well but that hasnt stopped peoples poor behaviour.

Ive encountered lots of bullies in my life, not always in relationships and sometimes bullies get allowed to carry on the way they are by other people who condone that behaviour.

Blackpool_Saver

So it looks like we have lost her. I hope those who were judgmental are happy now, she needed our help and now I'll bet she doesn't come back.

meritaten

Take heart people - even if Anon HAS bu99ered off never to return..........she has READ all the posts and words of wisdom on here. Hopefully, at some point in the near future she will have her 'light bulb moment' or slowly comes to realise the truth of the matter. It may not seem like it now - but my bet is that at some point she WILL get out of this relationship. She posted for advice didn't she? I think she posted as her subconscious was screaming at her to validate her suspicion she was in an abusive relationship. Don't be surprised if she is back in a few weeks under a new name! to ask for advice on how to get him out - because my bet is he is one of those leeches who never let go!

paulineb_2

Blackpool_Saver wrote: »

So it looks like we have lost her. I hope those who were judgmental are happy now, she needed our help and now I'll bet she doesn't come back.

It crossed my mind that she may have deleted the posts because her partner may have seen the thread.

It may be nothing to do with anyone on here.

If she doesnt come back, theres still a lot of information on the thread that she can download and use if and when she needs to.

paulineb_2

And I also think she may be a little shellshocked because she came on here asking how to fix the issues and just about everyone said, get out.

It can be a bit of a bodyblow even if you are being treated badly to have your eyes opened as to how bad this looks to people not involved in the situation.

julie2710

Has anyone considered that OPs OH may have found out about this thread? She said herself that he spends a lot of time on the PC.

I really hope that's not the case and that maybe just reading back through everything she had written herself may have been too much.

Pechow

The timing between her thinking that people were accusing her of being a bad parent, then deleting her posts straight after, is too coincidental to think that it was due to the partner seeing. I'm sure it was just because she felt attacked, even though that wasn't the case.

victory

Blackpool_Saver wrote: »

So it looks like we have lost her. I hope those who were judgmental are happy now, she needed our help and now I'll bet she doesn't come back.

My conscience is clear.

I hope anon you can read that people care about you and want you to have the strength to help yourself making life calmer and easier for yourself, take care, come back if you can, best wishes;)

Blackpool_Saver

victory wrote: »

My conscience is clear.

I hope anon you can read that people care about you and want you to have the strength to help yourself making life calmer and easier for yourself, take care, come back if you can, best wishes;)

I am glad there has been some Pm'ing going on ;-)