Are you happy on your own?

viv0147

Person_one wrote: »

^^ I recognise that! :rotfl:

You are right it was posted a while ago I don't know who to give the credit too but I thought it was brilliant so I saved it lol

SailorSam

[QUOTE=moneyistooshorttomention;610829
and am not at risk of a situation I have seen a friend going through (ie of finding my husband developed dementia and that, because he was my husband and I was honouring marriage vows, that I had to be a carer for years to someone who eventually didn't even recognise me etc).
[/QUOTE]

If it were the other way around though and you developed dementia, as much as you wouldn't want to have to rely on your husband it must be more scarey to be single and have to cope alone.

moneyistooshorttomention

SailorSam wrote: »

If it were the other way around though and you developed dementia, as much as you wouldn't want to have to rely on your husband it must be more scarey to be single and have to cope alone.

Obviously, none of us know whether we might be the one ourselves who developed dementia and cross our fingers that we won't.

I could cope a lot lot better with myself ever developing it than I could with a husband developing it personally. If a husband developed it - he might "blind himself" to the fact that he was getting it and/or just "live with it" and I would have to live with it too.

If I myself get dementia then, from what I can see as an outsider in that situation, I would imagine it would be possible for me to realise pretty early on that I had developed it (as I am very aware of keeping an eye on my mind to see if it is functioning as normal) - and prevent it developing any further (£10,000 and a plane ticket to Switzerland, for instance, would solve that problem for me personally). Dementia is only a problem IMO for someone who "lives with it" - rather than taking the instant "cure" I myself would use for it.

It's obviously everyone's right to make the decision for themselves whether to "live with" dementia or "cure it once and for all" (eg Switzerland) - provided that, if they decide to "live with it" they don't expect to impose the burden of that illness on someone who doesn't wish to take it on and turn them into a carer against their will.

One big advantage to being single IMO is knowing that you would never force someone else into a position where you were "reliant on them". I wouldn't want to do that to anyone else or lose my independence.

Person_one

viv0147 wrote: »

You are right it was posted a while ago I don't know who to give the credit too but I thought it was brilliant so I saved it lol

It was me. I'm duly flattered!

lemontart

I have been single for around 3/4 years now, have had the odd date but have come to the conclusion guys my age want different things to what I would like.

Yes I would like a companion a friend a significant other but the men I have met just appear to want a bed fellow and don't bang the door on the way out ( though to be fair I do prefer to wake hope alone now)

I am a carer for my daughter now , and normally work as well though my own health is bad at mo and increasingly so for past 18 months so now awaiting op. Meaning I cannot travel anymore and have little time, well no time to deal with a another now.

I would not say I was happy, more resigned to the fact I will grow old devoid of that someone special. There are few things I miss, a hug, some one to hold my hand, just touch me and I do not mean sex (that is easy to get if I so wished) someone to make me a cuppa with out asking, someone to just share some of the mundanity of the day/week/year etc with.

Also at times I am painfully lonely, well most of the time as much as I love my daughter and we get on well and are close, it is not quite the same as that certain someone.

lostinrates

moneyistooshorttomention wrote: »

Obviously, none of us know whether we might be the one ourselves who developed dementia and cross our fingers that we won't.

I could cope a lot lot better with myself ever developing it than I could with a husband developing it personally. If a husband developed it - he might "blind himself" to the fact that he was getting it and/or just "live with it" and I would have to live with it too.

If I myself get dementia then, from what I can see as an outsider in that situation, I would imagine it would be possible for me to realise pretty early on that I had developed it (as I am very aware of keeping an eye on my mind to see if it is functioning as normal) - and prevent it developing any further (£10,000 and a plane ticket to Switzerland, for instance, would solve that problem for me personally). Dementia is only a problem IMO for someone who "lives with it" - rather than taking the instant "cure" I myself would use for it.

It's obviously everyone's right to make the decision for themselves whether to "live with" dementia or "cure it once and for all" (eg Switzerland) - provided that, if they decide to "live with it" they don't expect to impose the burden of that illness on someone who doesn't wish to take it on and turn them into a carer against their will.

One big advantage to being single IMO is knowing that you would never force someone else into a position where you were "reliant on them". I wouldn't want to do that to anyone else or lose my independence.

You might hope its easy to recognise.

It runs strongly in my paternal family, my grandmother and aunt both had early onset Alzheimer's and others have had some sort of dementia and my father is getting more and more 'forgetful'. Not in an unsafe way by any means but in a way I notice and scares me. I managed to convince him to go to the doctor who poo pooed it could be the start of so etching worth taking more seriously. Of course the doctor is not the one finding grills or ovens left on all night ( not gas thank goodness) or doors unlocked. My father seems comps mentis in conversation but I notice something's are being either merged or perhaps deliberately rewritten...that's the thing...one doesn't know if its forgotten or distasteful.


My dad, btw IS single, and it does impact on other people. If you have family like it or not is causes them concern, close friends likewise. That's fine, and how it is ...it goes with caring about people,

tayforth

How did your exam go, alyth?

alyth

tayforth wrote: »

How did your exam go, alyth?

oh how thoughtful of you to remember - thank you. The exam was a dream, given the fact I had the last five years' past papers and the questions were all exactly the same (why change something that works) but it was a little stressful to pitch up at uni to find they had no record of me sitting the exam today.... cue a few manic phone calls and the exam paper being emailed over! I sat in a room with some random guy invigilating - he was very kind and went and got me a coffee an hour into it! One more to go next week. Thank you for asking, I'm now about to dive into a bottle of wine!

tayforth

Eek! Thank goodness they got it sorted! I'm so glad that it went well, and enjoy that bottle of wine - you've earned it xxx