Savings when seperating- scared I will lose it all

carefullycautious

If he does not play ball with the clean break agreement I would tell him that it is his decision to take you to court regarding the sale of the previous home so he will have to pay for a solicitor to take things forward.

I would get as much info/bank statements/debt statements etc and build a case against him yourself.

There is nothing stopping you from representing yourself to the judge. Plenty of people do it.

And please go to the CSA now.

Call his bluff, I bet you he will be putty in your hands if he thinks he will have to pay for a solicitor

neneromanova

To be honest it sounds like he is trying it on. Threaten you that he'll go to a solicitor if you go to CSA. I would call his bluff. I presume you still have all paperwork of where the money went and his mother would back you up that you paid her back the money?

Also didn't he email you and say that he didn't want anything from you at one point? I'm sure I remember you saying that. If you still have the emails then save them/print them and store them (just in case emails get lost or something).

I would ignore him now. Send no more emails unless absolutely necessary. he is being Petty now. Just go to the CSA and let him seek legal advice. Just keep your documentation for everything for if a lawyer comes to you.

tesuhoha

You said if I don't reply he will think he has won again. So if you send him an email and he doesn't bother to reply to it do you feel as if you have won? Like hell you do.

Personally I think you should leave things well alone. Let him take legal action if he wants to and let him pay for it. Why initiate something you can't afford that is for his benefit?

thorsoak

TWM: Just send him this link ...http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-27497764

If you have to go through CSA, although you will be charged, he will be charged more!

Just send him the link - with no comment! He should by now know that when you really mean business, you mean business! Stop being so "nice" to him!

tayforth

((((TWM))))

I really feel for you. Have a big virtual hug, I think you need it right now.

I agree with those who say go to the CSA. You have nothing at all to lose, and every month that goes by you're missing out on £300. That's £3,600 in a year. Your DD won't be 18 for another 6-7 years, that's a lot of money.

As far as him making a claim on anything of yours... I don't know much about the law in relation to this, but surely if divorce costs were awarded to you, that would be taken into account and reduce the amount you'd owe him? Also the bills you've paid for him etc, both before and after you separated?

That's even assuming that a judge will take his challenge seriously. With any luck, if he does get off his bottom to speak to a solicitor, they'll tell him that his claim won't succeed!

teawithmilk

well, no reply from him to my e-mail overnight. DD is due to go to his house afterschool tonight, she often goes on a wednesday. Apparently he HAD topped her phone up (or he did it when I e mailled him) , it was her fault she has to switch it back off and on again to activate the credit. So I feel a bit bad for moaning about that now.

£150 has been paid into my account from him this morning, No explaination of what its for- its a random amount that doesnt cover what he "owes" me for bills so I cant work out if its some installment towards it or if he thinks thats what he should be giving me for DD.

My solicitor is away for a weeks holiday so I'm going to try and get some advice from wikivorce again until she is back. And contact CSA today.

Caroline_a

teawithmilk wrote: »

well, no reply from him to my e-mail overnight. DD is due to go to his house afterschool tonight, she often goes on a wednesday. Apparently he HAD topped her phone up (or he did it when I e mailled him) , it was her fault she has to switch it back off and on again to activate the credit. So I feel a bit bad for moaning about that now.

£150 has been paid into my account from him this morning, No explaination of what its for- its a random amount that doesnt cover what he "owes" me for bills so I cant work out if its some installment towards it or if he thinks thats what he should be giving me for DD.

My solicitor is away for a weeks holiday so I'm going to try and get some advice from wikivorce again until she is back. And contact CSA today.

Yay!!! :T:T:T:T

Gigervamp

I've never heard of having to switch the phone off and on again in order to activate the credit. My husband tops up my phone and I don't have to switch it off. I think he's telling you porkies.

teawithmilk

well I have just spent an hour and a half on the phone to the CMS. They have take all my details and his details (luckily I had one of his old payslips so have his NI number)

As you can see from the tone of his e mails that i quoted ysterday, He still says that its my fault that I never told him how much he should be paying and that it is my fault that he now has no money and is short of cash.

So why do I feel bad and feel sorry for him??? what is WRONG with me??

Its really going to hit the fan now.

They will be writing to him and me and we will both get "welcome packs" within the next 7-10 days.

He will also be getting a phone call from them.

Im so very scared of his reaction now.

tayforth

Well done, TWM! I am very proud of you. I know you've been apprehensive about it, but you've definitely done the right thing. The law is on your side, so don't be scared of him.

We're here if you need to vent anytime. Keep us posted xxx