FINALLY DONE IT: Tayforth's new beginning

McCalls

tayforth wrote: »

I'll have to have it cleaned first. Not sure how much it'll sell for, but surely more than the cost of cleaning it? It was £1,500 (I know, ouch). If I got £300 for it I'd be happy.

This may be taboo (I'd be interested to hear your thoughts), but a friend suggested selling my engagement and wedding rings if he keeps the car. They're both very valuable and of no sentimental value to me any more.







I slept ok thanks. Only managed 6.5 hours, but that's better than I've had the last few nights. I'm a real 8-hours-or-I'm-useless girl.

I sold my Maggie Sottero designer wedding dress without getting it clean (and advertised it as such). I paid £950 for mine and got £300 unclean so I wouldn't worry too much about getting it cleaned. Most brides like to clean it themselves so its not all crumpled.

Sell my wedding is a good site or gum tree if you can't be arsed with eBay. Good luck!

duchy

paulineb wrote: »

Im not sure what the need is to either destroy a pc or do anything with it. Ive only read posts briefly as Ive been offline a few days but what is the reason for running a spyware scan just because someone has split up with their partner?

.

There was a suggestion that Tay's ex may have set up some key logging software to "spy" on her and various precautions were suggested.

tayforth

Just gathered up my meagre DVD collection and put it in a cupboard, all tidy! I don't own many DVDs, but I like to have a few for when I'm bored on a wet Sunday afternoon.

duchy wrote: »

I think Shegirl is amazing - but I do think a bad relationship can be a bit like banging your head repeatedly against a wall......You really don't realize how much it hurts til it stops and you realize what "normal" is again ...and then you are amazed how long it took you to realize ! (I too have the t-shirt -and steered clear of relationships for a long time as I didn't trust my judgement anymore -but am now with the sweetest most caring man who not only spoils me and treats me like a lady as well as a partner but also welcomes and accepts my ASD adult son -I'm blessed and he was worth waiting for)

How wonderful. :A You deserve happiness, duchy, and it's lovely to hear you speak so fondly of this man.

And yes, you don't realise what 'normal' is while you're in a sh!te relationship, it's like an epiphany when you finally understand that things can be so much better.

duchy wrote: »

Honestly -if it was me I'd feel safe and wouldn't bother with a hard drive format but you could also do that if you want to. Basically a PC shop will take off any stuff you want to keep (photos etc) then wipe your hard-drive clean and reinstall windows and reload your kept stuff.

Like I said I wouldn't bother but I can see why you might want to do this too after some of the scaremongering
I'd be happy with a Malwarebytes clean result though personally.

I'm happy with the Malwarebytes scan tbh. I'll put it out of my mind.

tayforth

McCalls wrote: »

I sold my Maggie Sottero designer wedding dress without getting it clean (and advertised it as such). I paid £950 for mine and got £300 unclean so I wouldn't worry too much about getting it cleaned. Most brides like to clean it themselves so its not all crumpled.

Sell my wedding is a good site or gum tree if you can't be arsed with eBay. Good luck!

Wow, that was good going! :T

Kayalana99

Thats true if I brought a 2nd hand dress I would get it cleaned even if the person had said it had already...

tayforth

Right, I'm going to bed. Very sleepy indeed. Trying really hard not to scratch this horrid rash! Aaaahhhhhh.

I've moved lots of bits and pieces around this evening, am making positive progress. Baby steps.

Goodnight everyone xxx

Angela

tayforth wrote: »

I'm home. Left work early as I wasn't feeling great. I've developed a horrible stomach ache, am going to rest up this evening and not attempt the brisk walk that I'd promised myself. Tomorrow maybe.

Yes you must rest otherwise YOU might not get to the wedding lol

Been lurking since the beginning glad you have nearly made it to the end of this nightmare only a few more days to go.

paulineb_2

duchy wrote: »

There was a suggestion that Tay's ex may have set up some key logging software to "spy" on her and various precautions were suggested.

Like getting rid of the pc:)

I would imagine that some ex partners when they arent very nice to say the least and are asked to leave might do stuff like that or install a camera in the flat but thats just peoples different experiences. Just because someone has been abusive doesnt mean that when they leave they wont go quietly, just my view.

paulineb_2

tayforth wrote: »

I'll leave it where it is. I have nothing to hide. And if he makes a claim on my savings, I'll make it known that he has done so, which won't go down well with his friends

.

Actually, I wouldnt involve his friends if I were you, regardless.
Its not their business. Or their battle and it might end up with people making comment about you speaking about him negatively. I can absolutely understand why you would be cheesed off if he wants to claim your savings as assets hes entitled to part of while you wouldnt want anything from him.

But the best person to take advice from on all of this is a solicitor, Im sure you've been advised re that a few times in the thread.

I know someone right now who is fighting for their share of a home they put a lot of money into, their wealthy ex partner (they werent married), is trying to deny them. Also stating that he isnt working to the CSA so he doesnt need to pay for his kids (hes very well off to the point that hes a millionaire), hes self employed and has gone off sick.

She isnt trying to screw him for every penny, shes just trying to get what shes entitled to. And that relationship was emotionally abusive as well.

But every set of circumstances are different and at this point in time you actually dont know whether your ex will even try and claim a penny of your savings.

You need to deal with everything one day at a time without worrying too much about what might happen.

tayforth

I phoned in sick. I had stomach pains during the night, and just couldn't face going to work after another bad sleep. The relief is overwhelming. I don't have to pretend to be fine at work today. I can have a break.

Doctor's appointment is later. I need to get this rash seen to.

Angela wrote: »

Yes you must rest otherwise YOU might not get to the wedding lol

Been lurking since the beginning glad you have nearly made it to the end of this nightmare only a few more days to go.

Thanks so much Angela. It's lovely of you to post, and I really appreciate your kind wishes xx

paulineb wrote: »

Like getting rid of the pc:)

I would imagine that some ex partners when they arent very nice to say the least and are asked to leave might do stuff like that or install a camera in the flat but thats just peoples different experiences. Just because someone has been abusive doesnt mean that when they leave they wont go quietly, just my view.

Well, I've seen with the car that he won't 'go quietly'.

paulineb wrote: »

Actually, I wouldnt involve his friends if I were you, regardless.
Its not their business. Or their battle and it might end up with people making comment about you speaking about him negatively. I can absolutely understand why you would be cheesed off if he wants to claim your savings as assets hes entitled to part of while you wouldnt want anything from him.

But the best person to take advice from on all of this is a solicitor, Im sure you've been advised re that a few times in the thread.

I know someone right now who is fighting for their share of a home they put a lot of money into, their wealthy ex partner (they werent married), is trying to deny them. Also stating that he isnt working to the CSA so he doesnt need to pay for his kids (hes very well off to the point that hes a millionaire), hes self employed and has gone off sick.

She isnt trying to screw him for every penny, shes just trying to get what shes entitled to. And that relationship was emotionally abusive as well.

But every set of circumstances are different and at this point in time you actually dont know whether your ex will even try and claim a penny of your savings.

You need to deal with everything one day at a time without worrying too much about what might happen.

I will take advice from a solicitor if that happens. As for making it known, I'll decide on that if it happens. The way he's treated me to date is shameful enough. Trying to make a claim on my savings would be the lowest of the low.