Surname?!

daska

Was this a while back? I only ask because a lot of institutions/employers are now a lot more assiduous about checking qualifications and ID. Schools are supposed to ensure that while they will use 'known as' names for general purposes, exam certificates are applied for in the child's legal name. I recently had to submit DS1's birth certificate to his current school so they could make sure this was done correctly because his father had registered him under a different name.

jumpedtheshark

claire16c wrote: »

That post horrified me. Like something out of the Victorian era.

But feminism is about CHOICE. OP is choosing to change her name and it's anti-feminist to label her decision otherwise just because it doesn't fit one conception of feminism.

Mojisola

jumpedtheshark wrote: »

But feminism is about CHOICE. OP is choosing to change her name and it's anti-feminist to label her decision otherwise just because it doesn't fit one conception of feminism.

I agree feminism about choice but the OP's thinking is "OH wants us all to have the same surname; he won't change his to mine; to achieve his wishes, I'll have to change mine and the kids".

Doesn't sound much like an active choice to me.

claire16c

jumpedtheshark wrote: »

But feminism is about CHOICE. OP is choosing to change her name and it's anti-feminist to label her decision otherwise just because it doesn't fit one conception of feminism.

I wasn't talking about the OPs post.

pigpen

daska wrote: »

Was this a while back? I only ask because a lot of institutions/employers are now a lot more assiduous about checking qualifications and ID. Schools are supposed to ensure that while they will use 'known as' names for general purposes, exam certificates are applied for in the child's legal name. I recently had to submit DS1's birth certificate to his current school so they could make sure this was done correctly because his father had registered him under a different name.

My brother has his 'known as' name on all his exam certificates. He took my dads name in 1982 and has never used any other since for anything.

Mimi_Arc_en_ciel

Mojisola wrote: »

I agree feminism about choice but the OP's thinking is "OH wants us all to have the same surname; he won't change his to mine; to achieve his wishes, I'll have to change mine and the kids".

Doesn't sound much like an active choice to me.

Bah - no matter how many times I tell you that it is ME you still won't believe me - the initial suggestion was mine when we was talking names for DD2, it was discussed at length - for over a year and a half - and a mutually agreeable decision was made. Geez, anyone would think he's got a gun at my head the way your going off lol

It is my personal choice to change names - me, myself and I :-)

Mojisola

Mimi_Arc_en_ciel wrote: »

Bah - no matter how many times I tell you that it is ME you still won't believe me - the initial suggestion was mine when we was talking names for DD2, it was discussed at length - for over a year and a half - and a mutually agreeable decision was made. Geez, anyone would think he's got a gun at my head the way your going off lol

It is my personal choice to change names - me, myself and I :-)

So you're stuck with having different names for the foreseeable future.

We can only go on what you say (we can't hear the tone of voice which might make some of the comments more jokey) but you have said about him refusing to change his name but wanting you all to have the same name.

Person_one

jumpedtheshark wrote: »

But feminism is about CHOICE. OP is choosing to change her name and it's anti-feminist to label her decision otherwise just because it doesn't fit one conception of feminism.

The post that was horrifying wasn't anything to do with choice, it was an assumption that little girls always grow up to marry and take their husband's name and that because of this the name they have until they get married is completely insignificant.

So yeah, not very feminist!

Padstow

My guess is that the guy's double barrelled surname is far more attractive than the OP's.

pigpen

Padstow wrote: »

My guess is that the guy's double barrelled surname is far more attractive than the OP's.

They sound much more upper class ... Whereas them there Smiths are just commoners (Sorry all those Smiths out there it was just a name to use instead of my own!)