Need help with saying no to someone while not falling out

notanewuser

nickyhutch wrote: »

I've always wondered why God lets things like the Boxing Day Tsunami, Hurricane Katrina, the American school shootings and the like happen if he is an all-loving God..... I know why, now - he's taken his eye off the ball because he's too busy talking to people about :Ttrivialities like flipping creche rotas.

:rotfl: :T :rotfl: :T :rotfl: :T

Somerset

Sambucus_Nigra wrote: »

I can understand why opposing religions don't come to the same conclusion; but this is the same church! So if someone higher up the food chain says 'do what you feel is right' then why is Skinty still not able to tell Donna to [ahem] foxtrot oscar?

Because the phrase '' do what you feel is right '' isn't genuinely meant in the context of a church. The translation is '' do what you think is right as long as it's in accordance with what we think is right''. And presumerably, if you refuse to conform, you are perceived to be wilful or selfish.

warehouse

Not read through all the pages and usual anti-god clique, but you simply need to say no and be assertive about it. The first answer you got was on the money.

NO.

Savvy_Sue

happy2share wrote: »

first up what is the point of the creche if its the parents sitting in it with their kids - isn't the idea that they are freed up to worship?

what happens here is that there are two people 'scheduled' to be on creche duty - they'll have been CRB checked and they'll run the session with a story, songs and activities in line with the rest of the children's groups.

However, when I used to do it, and when my lot were that age group, you'd always find that at least one parent NOT on duty would end up staying out, either because the child wouldn't settle, or the parent didn't choose to leave their child. They would attend to their own child, and those on duty would be responsible for the rest of the little darlings.

Obviously sometimes there'd be several 'vetted' parents in the room, and I often felt like a spare part. Point was, I was down for that week so I'd be there.

For the OP, sometimes it's time to move on. That's usually hard, especially when you've been there for a long time. And sometimes the moving on just seems impossible - if we hadn't moved away when we did I just don't know what we would have done, because we couldn't see how to move to a different church without it creating as many problems as it solved.

DH was doing some research after we'd moved which involved interviewing some of our old friends. One couple described a sermon in which the minister quoted "He who is not for us is against us", at which point they exchanged glances and realised that was likely to be their last service in that church. It would likely have been ours too ... if we'd not already moved 100 miles away!

Errata

It all sounds very unfortunate if the OP can't talk to the church 'leader'
about the difficulty she's experiencing and ask them to guide/advise/inform/mediate. Isn't thier job caring for the wellbeing of their congregation?

mountainofdebt

If I follow Poet's train of thought, then I can think of a very good reason why Skintchick doesn't want to do the creche thingy and it doesn't involve God either

skintchick

mountainofdebt wrote: »

If I follow Poet's train of thought, then I can think of a very good reason why Skintchick doesn't want to do the creche thingy and it doesn't involve God either

Oh do share as I have absolutely no idea what you're trying to suggest I'm thinking!

burnoutbabe

if the church insist that one parent does the creche, then why not the husband do it and the OP free to do the worship. everyone happy?

Mojisola

burnoutbabe wrote: »

if the church insist that one parent does the creche, then why not the husband do it and the OP free to do the worship. everyone happy?

Because he's running the group for the older children.

mrcow

Mojisola wrote: »

Because he's running the group for the older children.

They have a point.

One of the other parents can run that. If it's about being responsible for your own children (or children within the age bracket of your own), then someone who has a child in the older group can cater for that.