mum not letting me move back in..

victory

Person_one wrote: »

Is it more mature to keep an argument going pointlessly?

Its not very nice to see a gang of women old enough to know better rounding on a slightly immature but not criminal or evil young woman like a pack of lionesses!

I'm convinced a thread should last for a few pages because up until then questions get answers, ideas shares, good points made, once that's all out of the way it just goes round and round;)

marisco_2

365days wrote: »

I find the fact that you find her reaction 'amusing' makes you far, far worse than immature. To take amusement in someones hurt well, I wonder what the word for that is.

I'm going to stop stepping in for her, she is more than capable of fighting her own battles.

You have taken my comment out of context as well you know. I said it was amusing how she was proving everyone right over how immature she is. I never said I found someones hurt amusing, indeed you are the only one to say that.

I dont believe the OP is hurting. I stopped believing how badly her mum was allegedly treating her when her story changed way further up this thread. I think she is a drama queen who is twisting things and making a mum who wont bow down to her every wish out to be worse than she is.

If you dont see things like that fine, you are welcome to hold your view, just as I am.

marisco_2

Person_one wrote: »

Is it more mature to keep an argument going pointlessly?

I was not doing that. I gave my view on comments that were made about me. If you dont agree with what I say why not show some maturity and ignore it. Why do you feel the need to make comments on a discussion between two people that had nothing to do with you whatsoever?

You do that alot on many threads and on lots of occassions all it achieves is your post getting removed!

Mojisola

honey - are you following this thread - https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/4398759

Does any of it ring a bell for you?

HoneyAndLemon

Mojisola wrote: »

honey - are you following this thread - https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/4398759

Does any of it ring a bell for you?

Alot of it does actually. Especially the guilt part.

make_me_wise

365days wrote: »

To take amusement in someones hurt well, I wonder what the word for that is.

Marisco didn't do that as you can clearly see when you read her post. I wonder what the word for you is, someone who quoted another and purposefully twisted what they wrote in order to try and ridicule them.

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

Just a thought - if I didn't think somebody was being wise in leaving Uni, getting into debt, potentially starting a family way too young and tying themselves down with someone I had go to know over months, which had led me to conclude it was the wrong thing - how could I delay them and give the relationship (like most started in the teens) a little more time to fizzle out?


Perhaps suggesting that they have a really big wedding, so they have to spend longer saving?

Perhaps letting them founder a bit - because they're not twelve year olds and need to experience some hardship, or the first time they encounter a problem in married life, they'll be breaking up?

Perhaps by not basically giving them about (going by the rental rates around here) the equivalent of about £700/month by letting them stay for a pittance?



After all, if she's got MS - and would have had to be experiencing some significant symptoms for it to even be considered by the GP, let alone tested for - she might be thinking 'I might not be around as long to get to know DD as an adult.'

It might even be that the going to move in with DD (I assume fully adapted large family homes are easily affordable in the OP's area if she thinks that's likely to be something they can afford in the future) was on the the basis of the initial diagnosis, and since then further tests have suggested she might have more time of good health, so she's realised she won't be as dependent as she thought.

ska_lover

HoneyAndLemon wrote: »

Its not my fault she got herself pregnant. She was an adult when she did that. Thats not something I need to feel guilty for. Isn't the point your making that adults need to take responsibility and that there shouldn't be any sympathy for me? why should my mums situation be any different? Automatically she's had a tougher time because she had a child? People without kids have it easy do they?

And in what way am I not independant? Because I asked for help?

Yes, automatically she would have had a harder time of things, trying to bring up a child as a single parent, is completely different from just looking after yourself. Only having yourself to fend for, and being a single parent to a small child are not even similar, they are a totally different ball park way of living. Even just saying that is a huge downer on all the single mums/dads out there. Your mum would have had to sacrifice an awful lot just so you could have basics.


You have masses of resentment towards your mum, it really does shine through on your posts, as you talk about this woman as if she were the scum of the earth who tries to make you feel guilty for your very existance - and if we can see the resentment, I am sure your mother has picked up on it too. This could be a huge indicator of why she doesn't want you back in her house?

If she really IS as bad as you are saying (only you will know) then maybe you are better off distancing yourself

Hanging_by_a_thread

365days wrote: »

it wasn't her fault that her mum appears to put what's between her legs in front of her own daughter.

What a disgusting thing to write about a woman you do not know. We only have the OPs word for it that this woman has treated her so badly.

Personally I dont believe a word of it and I will explain why. The OP has made out in her first post that things were far worse than they actually are, admitting this herself later in the thread. She thanked the person who suggested she manipulate her mother so she can get her own way. At that point I lost all respect for her.

Yet you think she has carried herself exceptionally well! If comments like the one you made above are your social level, then I can understand how you can bring yourself to think that of her.

Bennifred

I wonder how many people who think their parent is selfish or a narcissist are actually that way inclined themselves? :think: