Should I be more cross with her?

Spirit_2

If those in authority are wrong then it is important there are courageous people to challenge them. Your DD took a risk but stood up for herself and her community albeit in quite a challenging way. There are consequences, but I suspect she is right in that 'she' has sorted it.

I would tell her, that she has done the right thing, but perhaps articulated it in the wrong way and that she continues to occupy the moral high ground by getting on with the C1.

thatgirlsam

tyllwyd wrote: »

If the conversation was exactly as your daughter has repeated it, then I'd say her cheekiness was in response to his own rudeness, and it was a bit rich of him to give her a punishment for it - and I would consider taking it further because he was poking fun at her just because of where she lived.

BUT before I made a fuss, I would want to be 100 per cent sure that the version of the story that I'd heard was completely accurate - there might potentially have been a bit of editing to make it sound better from her point of view when it got repeated to you.

Yep, I agree I did wonder if i got the 'full version'

But... she has always been one for fairness and honesty, and promises me that is what happened. She is one of those kids who wouldn't want a teacher to get into trouble unfairly!

I don't know wether to tell the school, obviously they will have to have a word to him to ask him what happened, I don't want him then marking her out as a trouble maker. Although, it is out of order of him to make these comments in the first place.

I will ask to talk to her head of year, who is lovely and likes my daughter, and explain to her what has happened

fluffnutter

Daughter was sticking up for herself, her family and friends. Teacher's a cock who needs to be reminded that it's not particularly becoming to be a snob, particularly when you're surrounded by kids whom it's your job to help grow up with open minds and inclusive attitudes.

thatgirlsam

Spirit wrote: »

If those in authority are wrong then it is important there are courageous people to challenge them. Your DD took a risk but stood up for herself and her community albeit in quite a challenging way. There are consequences, but I suspect she is right in that 'she' has sorted it.

I would tell her, that she has done the right thing, but perhaps articulated it in the wrong way and that she continues to occupy the moral high ground by getting on with the C1.

Yep, she will definitley be doing the C1. Even though he was rude, she could have dealt with it in a less cheeky way. I suppose her and her teacher could be as bad as each other here for being rude! She is 13 though, I don't know how old he is but I'm sure old enough to know better than her!

JimmyTheWig

thatgirlsam wrote: »

In class today the teacher was making derogatory comments about the estate we live on, saying how rough it is and just awful etc. He asked the class who here lives on *our estate*.

She put her hand up, he then rolled his eyes and said 'oh there's always one'

She said 'It really isn't that bad Sir'. He said, 'well where do you know that's worse than *our estate*.

She said 'Your road', he asks why, she says 'Because you live on it'

Do you do anything as a treat for your children when they deserve it? If you do, I'd be doing that for your daughter tonight.
Good for her.

What does this punishment entail? Is it something that she has to do (e.g. lines or detention) or is it more something for her to bring home. Depending on what it is I'd be making sure that she doesn't have to do it.

I'd take the lead from your daughter as to whether to take it further or not. If she doesn't want you to then fair enough, but I'd be tempted to say that a comment like that was enough to get him moved to a different class.

thatgirlsam

fluffnutter wrote: »

Daughter was sticking up for herself, her family and friends. Teacher's a !!!! who needs to be reminded that it's not particularly becoming to be a snob, particularly when you're surrounded by kids whom it's your job to help grow up with open minds and inclusive attitudes.

I thought that in my head, obviously won't be saying that to my dd

Mojisola

What would worry me about this kind of attitude - especially if it's not just confined to this one teacher - is that children from that estate will be treated differently because "no-one from there turns out well".

Prejudices affect the way we interact with other people, sometimes unconsciously, and can lead to reduced expectations.

missprice

I reckon I would be asking for the teacher to also be given a C1 for his comments about the estate.
I don’t live on a great estate either and I would have said the same thing or similar and have done to others who have derided where I live as being a rough estate and even those who pointed out there were murders around here (that made it to the news) a few years ago. as in murders happen all the time in every walk of life not solely in the bad estates.

Even if the reason for the comments was about supply and demand and house prices there was no need to pick on a local estate. in every town/city there are bad and good estates, plenty of others to pick on further away for that kind of discussion.

MentalMinnie

I think you should be making an appointment to see the head to make a complaint. How rude of the teacher!! But well done to your daughter for standing up to his small minded views!

thatgirlsam

Mojisola wrote: »

What would worry me about this kind of attitude - especially if it's not just confined to this one teacher - is that children from that estate will be treated differently because "no-one from there turns out well".

Prejudices affect the way we interact with other people, sometimes unconsciously, and can lead to reduced expectations.

I don't think that's the case. I certainly hope not anyway. There are many children from this estate who go to the school, it was unusual that she was the only one in this particular class.

What is important to me is how my daughter feels about where she lives. She says she is proud to live here, it is where she was born and raised (so far) so it must be a good place! And honestly, it isn't that bad... I've had scarier haircuts tbh, it isn't The Bronx or anything