Grandparents looking after grandchildren

jackyann

I agree that it is both ridiculous, and not your problem (unless you feel there is any serious danger / neglect)
I too think that it just may not end up as you have laid out - lots of things might happen between now & then.
I see 2 things that you might do: one is to let your SiLs know that they have your backing should they decide not to go along with GPs' plan. The other is to drop the hint that whitewings suggested.

Beyond that, I hope that your in-laws, having brought up 4 children, will come to realise that this is about what is best for the children, not about demonstrating how capable they are. I have seen this happen.
Otherwise, give thanks that you are well away from it.

notanewuser

choccybuttons wrote: »

I would say where on earth are they going to put 5 cots for the children to have their naps]

I can't imagine they would all sleep at the same times, and they'd all sleep in their prams/buggies I guess.

notanewuser

gibson123 wrote: »

I agree you should stay out of it, sounds like your SIL wants to hide behind you, she needs to learn to stick up for her kids herself. You can tell her how to do it, but not actually do it for her if you know what I mean.

My Mum who was in her late sixties when my DD was a baby wanted to look after her FT, but I thought it was too restricting for my Mum and she would end up resenting my baby. I put my foot down and insisted, it didn't stop my Mum picking her up early (breaking her out of jail in her opinion) and taking her to the park or for ice cream. I am so glad i did now because all my DD daughters memories of her granny are good ones, they were always having fun together and my Mum always had DD because she wanted to spend time with her not because she was obligated.

That's exactly how my parents are with my DD. they don't want her full time, I don't want them to have her full time and they all have a fab time because none of it is forced. :beer:

Ruby_woo

Gosh what if all of the children and both grandparents were in the mini bus, if they had an accident - well it doesn't bear thinking about x

apesxx

the idea is totally barmy! A childminder is only allowed one baby under 1 yr old at any one time, i think they would be totally crazy to take on 3 babies and 2 toddlers. im more than half their age and i will admit i couldnt do it, my 2 at 3 and 6 drive me crazy sometimes lol.

i would suggest to the brothers/SIL'S that they agree to one day a week with grandparents on alternate days to the others and leave it at that.
not only the safety of the children but i would imagine that 5 young children would have a serious drain on the health of the grand parents.

mysk_girl

Sounds insane! My MIL looks after mine 2 days a week, but will only have one at a time and has a week off every 6 weeks or so (I'm lucky to have a very flexible childminder who is happy with this). I would not let her have both (and soon to be 3!) of them, no one would enjoy themselves at all and I want my children's memories of their grandparents to be good ones!

samtoby

I have to say some people really do astound me! And this is one of those situations. Wow!

whitewing

It reminds me of the dad on Meet The Fockers.

You may find the situation sorts itself out while the mothers are on maternity leave anyway. I know I felt terrible for a while when DH and I were in the car together and LO was elsewhere, because I hated the thought of an accident that could affect us both. I would really worry about the gp and all the gc and the amount of driving. I honestly think when it comes to it, the mothers will put their collective feet down.

poet123

I really don't think you should be getting involved. It doesn't affect you so I would smile politely when the issue arises and leave all the adults to sort out the detail. It is plainly not logistically advisable for either the kids or the gp's to have this arrangement, but they and the parents are the only ones who need be involved.

meritaten

sorry, but it sounds like in-laws are 'control freaks'. why 'insist' on childminding? It is up to the parent childcare arrangements surely?
It really isnt safe to have so many babes and toddlers together! I am a grandma and childmind a lot, I have six grandkids but 'space out' when I have them. youngest GS is Mon and Wed (his other set of grandparents have him another two days a week), 3 middle GDs is after school Tues, oldest is usually a Sunday or occasionally a Sat and oldest GD is either a Friday or Sat (if oldest GS isnt staying over).
Sounds complicated and it is! they have to 'Book' Sleepovers which go on the calendar exept for Mon, Tues, Wed which is a standing arrangement! otherwise its first come first served! excepting emergencies obviously.