Would you pay to go to a wedding?

MrsE_2

Person_one wrote: »

Just saying, its not really fair for you to moan about people having hen dos abroad.

(I thought they'd invited some friends too, do they actually want them to decline then?)

Also to be fair, part of the reason my DD wants to get married abroad is to get a dreamy wedding at a fairly cheap price.
Having a bells & whistles wedding in the UK is beyond their & my budget.

But making a stag/hen do from a night on the tiles into a holiday is not about saving money or stretching what you have.

It's unecessary expense.

My dd getting married abroad is us as a family who would be on that type of holiday taking advantage of the fact that you can get married abroad for peanuts (compared to the UK).

Saturnalia

POPPYOSCAR wrote: »

A close friend of a family member recently got married and she initially wanted to go away for the weekend for her hen do.

Some of her friends were honest with her and said they could not afford it so she changed her plans and made arrangements that suited them all. Had she gone ahead with the weekend away they would have been happy for her.

A bit of honesty goes a long way.

Aye, another friend got married last year and she asked everyone's opinion on a girly spa weekend in Edinburgh.

- A parp to get to for everyone (easier for me to get there from London than for the rest of them based in the NW!)
- Very expensive city and spa hotels aren't known for being inexpensive
- Most of her friends (like her) work in the hospital, on odd shifts, have partners also working, so childcare and time off would be a problem

So the verdict was, lovely idea but no can do. She listened. And instead we went for a Chinese buffet meal and a night pub crawl and had a fantastic time. She and groom also had a joint do at their house a few weeks later. Everyone brought a bottle and they did barbecue food.

Two fab, and low-budget, nights oot! :j

andygb

mountainofdebt wrote: »

Ah if only everyone's family was so understanding.

There's been numerous threads on MSE over the years about people being guilt tripped in going abroad because the sister / brother/ whoever is having a hissy fit over someone who has had the courage to say no.

This is exactly the situation which we have found ourselves in a couple of times, from the same in laws, who are just OTT about everything. The SiL is the driving force behind it all, constantly wanting to show off, and will try to humiliate anyone who fails to fall in line with her plans.
The first wedding about four years ago was for her eldest daughter, and although we managed to turn it into a holiday, it cost us nearly £4K, way above our normal budget. We gave them a card and explained that their present was us turning up for the wedding - what a reaction we got to that statement!:mad:
Then two years ago the other daughter got hitched in the Maldives, and my OH felt duty bound to attend, despite me reminding her what happened at the previous do. We did the same thing again - spent shedloads of money and then explained that we could not afford to give them a present, because actually we could not really afford to go in the first place.
The SiL went ballistic and called us mean, and subsequently we were not invited to the daughter's reception in the UK a month later.
We are pretty down to earth people, and so are our friends, but the unfortunate thing about this, is that the old saying - "you can choose your friends but not your relations" - is absolutely true.
We have the greedy, selfish relations from hell - luckily we have each other.;)

tara747

MrsE wrote: »

You really are incredibally rude. My dd will just have an open invitation to close friends & family should any decide they might like to come. We only expect that it shall be parents & grooms brother.
I thought people only brought gifts if they came to the wedding - in the main. There will be 2 cash gifts from the other parents & I, I guess the grooms brother will buy something & thats likely to be it.
There will be no reception back in the UK.

Whether you go to package destinations or not, I was letting you know that you could use the big package companies for flight only tickets & should you want to attend the wedding in some, was it a tacky european destination (nice....) then you could get a flight only deal this way.

However if you don't want to attend, just say so, you're certainly not backward in speaking your mind on the internet.

I'm really not incredibly rude. I haven't been rude at all. You're being very defensive about me expressing my opinion, which is that it's very odd to invite someone to a wedding knowing that they can't attend, and that some people see this as fishing for presents.

You then patronised me by saying that perhaps I don't travel often

Believe me, the destination in my OH's family member's case *is* tacky (imho) and it's the thought of having to spend a week there that horrifies me. As you no doubt know, the package operators' flights tend to be only once a week, in either direction.

Saturnalia wrote: »

And when did this "I'm a Princess" nonsense start? Don't most girls grow out of Disney at about age 6?

The wives of Prince Charles & Prince William are "only" Duchesses, and they definitely outrank you.

(I mean 'you' generic, not you Meritaten!)

Oh my God, YES. The number of times I wanted to VOMIT in a bridal shop when the SA said 'you want to feel like a princess on your wedding day', uggghhhhhh.

I actually once said under my breath in the changing room, "I'm not bloody five years old!!" :rotfl:

Any grown woman who says that she wants to be a princess on her wedding day shouldn't be allowed a pair of scissors imho. :rotfl:

Idiophreak

Saturnalia wrote: »

And when did this "I'm a Princess" nonsense start? Don't most girls grow out of Disney at about age 6?

Dunno, do they?

Do boys grow out of playing football, model trainsets and video games?

A lot of people want what they saw other people while they were growing up - and these days, that's often on TV... I think it's a bit coarse to describe it as "nonsense", tbh.

securityguy

andygb wrote: »

"you can choose your friends but not your relations" - is absolutely true.

You can, however, choose whether you spend any time with them, have anything to do with them, or even answer their phone calls. The "but you must talk to your sister" police won't come around.

[Deleted User]

Idiophreak wrote: »

Dunno, do they?

Do boys grow out of playing football, model trainsets and video games?

Hopefully they do grow out of wearing Batman and Superman outfits though (although not sure on this one) :eek:

Gloomendoom

Sleazy wrote: »

Hopefully they do grow out of wearing Batman and Superman outfits though (although not sure on this one) :eek:

Some still like to dress up as footballers though and some even stick little footballer dolls in their car windows.

POPPYOSCAR

Sleazy wrote: »

Hopefully they do grow out of wearing Batman and Superman outfits though (although not sure on this one) :eek:

I know several in their 30s that love nothing better than a fancy dress party and a good excuse to relive their childhood.

Saturnalia

Idiophreak wrote: »

Dunno, do they?

Do boys grow out of playing football, model trainsets and video games?

A lot of people want what they saw other people while they were growing up - and these days, that's often on TV... I think it's a bit coarse to describe it as "nonsense", tbh.

Do boys grow up full-stop? :rotfl: Only joking. I have a little train set and I like playing with my nephew's trains & watching Thomas with him as much as he does so I can't complain!

I doubt I'd start telling everyone I was a steam train and demanding to be treated as one in the run-up to my wedding though. (Maybe I should! )

Sleazy wrote: »

Hopefully they do grow out of wearing Batman and Superman outfits though (although not sure on this one) :eek:

Dunno, current crush is a serious Trekkie who goes to conventions and has a wardrobe of costumes!

I'd definitely marry a groom in a Batman outfit though!!!

Were there any princesses in Star Trek? They'd probably be massively cooler and tougher characters than the Disney girls.