Would you pay to go to a wedding?

msb5262

florere wrote: »

Write to the bride to tell her that you have remembered a prior engagement for the evening but that you would still like to come to the marriage service to see her married. She is going to look a bit daft asking for money for the food when she has booked such a posh venue, it will be talked about for years and not for the right reason.;)

The OP is married to the bride's brother so somehow I don't think this will wash...

florere

msb5262 wrote: »

The OP is married to the bride's brother so somehow I don't think this will wash...

Would I be right in thinking that you know the family, I can find no mention of her becoming the sister-in-law, I only see a reference to being a family member.

coolcait

florere wrote: »

Would I be right in thinking that you know the family, I can find no mention of her becoming the sister-in-law, I only see a reference to being a family member.

Post 66, second paragraph, third sentence:

"We were only told right now as it's OH's sister lol"

http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showpost.php?p=55636315&postcount=66

It's easily missed, in 17 pages of posts dating back to autumn 2012 - but it's there....

msb5262

Thanks coolcait - that saved me a job!

timbo58

You know someones screwed up when there are more people at the ceremony than the meal/evening do!

I'm afraid I'd do the same and it's my little sisters wedding later this year: she starts pulling that 'you'll have to pay for the meal' and I'll send a card and go off on the holiday I cancelled because of her insistence otherwise.

I don't care about whether I can afford it or not, I couldn't give a crap if it was £100 a head, it's the principle and that principle is 'you cut your cloth' if you can't afford a fancy wedding don't have one.
My 1st wedding cost probably about £200 including a round of drinks at the pub, we had no honeymoon till 3 years later and my sisters is her 2nd too and she's lived with him for ages, so it's not as if it's her 1st and only.

Yes, thats sounds harsh, but anyone who expects you to pay out directly for coming to their wedding is taking the !!!! IMHO.
What next? Selling tickets for the gallery/stalls/and a private box?

MrsE_2

Person_one wrote: »

Really, I think she should only invite people she's willing to pay for. It's still too much to ask of guests even if you expect them to say no, they'll still feel obliged/awkward.

If she did that she wouldn't ask anyone. No one is under any obligation at all to go. Only close family & friends will be invited anyway. If a couple of them decide to use it as their annual holiday it's a bonus.

Person_one

MrsE wrote: »

If she did that she wouldn't ask anyone.

There you go.

Getting married abroad used to be called eloping and was what couples did if they wanted it to be just the two of them and no family or friends.

It seems that now its done because people want pictures on a beach with the sun shining.

MrsE_2

Mojisola wrote: »

That not an invitation - that's just a notification that she's getting married.

I would find it a bit insulting to be sent an invitation following a discussion - well, we know Moji won't be able to afford to come but we'll sent her an invite anyway and then no-one can say we didn't think of her.

If a couple want a small wedding abroad, be honest about it and just invite the people they really want to be there.

Change expect for anticipate.
Can't win can she - not expecting people to attend is rude, expecting people to attend is also rude.....

MrsE_2

Person_one wrote: »

There you go.

Getting married abroad used to be called eloping and was what couples did if they wanted it to be just the two of them and no family or friends.

It seems that now its done because people want pictures on a beach with the sun shining.

No - it's because she wants a small relaxed family wedding.
My sister got married abroad & it was the best wedding ever.
Relaxed, chilled & fun and ONLY those who really wanted to be there were there

Person_one

MrsE wrote: »

No - it's because she wants a small relaxed family wedding.

I'm sure she could have managed that in this country.