Would you pay to go to a wedding?

MrsE_2

tara747 wrote: »

This bugs me enormously. It's not a holiday if you have to spend at least a day of it (and probably longer) doing wedding-y stuff, and what if it's somewhere that you hate???

Everyone has different taste in holiday destinations. Some like 'traditional' resorts and package holidays, I hate them. I prefer independent travel.

A fairly close family member of OH's has mooted getting married in 2015 in a tacky European destination. There are no scheduled flights from here (only packages) so it would cost about £1,000 for me and OH just for travel and accommodation, plus we'd have to take a week's annual leave. NO WAY are we going. We're dreading the reaction when we say so but we won't change our minds.


+1

Well luckily for us, we take a certain similar type of holiday & the location has been discussed with the immediate family who will be going & we are all happy with Mexico.

You're not invited so it shouldn't bug you where my DD is getting married.

It bugs me that strangers on a forum think its ok to be rude about people who choose to do their wedding a little bit different (and cheaper) than the norm.

Perhaps you don't travel very often, but destinations to where there are no scheduled flights & that are served by the package companies, well you can get a flight only ticket from a package operator.

Mojisola

MrsE wrote: »

Well luckily for us, we take a certain similar type of holiday & the local has been discussed with the immediate family who will be going & we are all happy with Mexico.
You're not invited so it shouldn't bug you where my DD is getting married.

I think this is a different situation where everyone involved has been included in the planning.

The more typical scenario is where a couple choose their "dream location" and then get annoyed that everyone they invite to the do doesn't rush about planning their annual holiday around the occasion.

There was a thread a while ago on here where the bride-to-be sent an email round the guests that turned down the invitation pointing out that she had given them over a year's notice so that they could book their holidays from work at the right time and that they would only need to save £xxx a month to be able to pay for the trip and that if they couldn't be bothered to do that, she would take it as a personal insult!

Errata

she would take it as a personal insult!

And a thoroughly well deserved one, in her case.

MrsE_2

Mojisola wrote: »

There was a thread a while ago on here where the bride-to-be sent an email round the guests that turned down the invitation pointing out that she had given them over a year's notice so that they could book their holidays from work at the right time and that they would only need to save £xxx a month to be able to pay for the trip and that if they couldn't be bothered to do that, she would take it as a personal insult!

While I totally support my DDs right to get married where the hell she wants & indeed any bride.
I also have, as does anyone else the right to decide should I/they go!!!!
There should be no pressure on guests nor offence taken should people choose not to go.

Clueless969

There seems to be far too many folk on here that are taking the comments personally - I'm reasonably sure that none of the comments are aimed at anyone specific but are just folk speaking from personal feelings and experience.

Personally, as I've already hinted, I need a very good reason to attend anyone's wedding. If any of my children decided to get married in their "overseas dream location", they would be doing it without me. Yes, I do love my children but picking an "overseas dream location" and expecting even one's nearest and dearest to turn up because you've decided that's what you want is, as far as I am concerned, 100% selfish.

The presumption that anyone's family members might have the time to spare or a large sum of money to spend on a holiday that happens to coincide with the "happy day" is unreasonable.

Again personally, there is no way that I would attend any wedding that was out of my financial reach as I would not, even for my children, go into debt just to be there for their happy day. I would also like to think that my children would be more considerate than to put their close family under that sort of pressure.

Just my personal tuppence worth.

lazer

What if the reason for an oversee's wedding is that it is where the bride or groom is from - would that change peoples feelings about going to an oversea's wedding?

fiscalfreckles

To answer the original question...No!

andygb

lazer wrote: »

What if the reason for an oversee's wedding is that it is where the bride or groom is from - would that change peoples feelings about going to an oversea's wedding?

That is obviously a different situation entirely, and bears no relation to the weddings in Maldives/Seychelles/Copacabana/Sorrento/Ko Samui, or indeed any of the other "exotic" locations which now seem so popular.
In my painful experience, there is often pressure put on family members to attend these extravaganzas, and a lack of consideration for individual circumstances.
As for paying to go to a wedding - forget it, I would not pay to go to a Premiership football match, let alone someone so mean that they feel that their guests should pay for their wedding.

Gloomendoom

lazer wrote: »

What if the reason for an oversee's wedding is that it is where the bride or groom is from - would that change peoples feelings about going to an oversea's wedding?

Possibly. However, for us, it would also depend on where the wedding was. If it was somewhere where attending the wedding could be combined with a holiday in an an area or country we would not normally have visited, then we would be more likely to attend.

I strongly feel that, when a wedding is planned, it is the duty of the bride and groom to give due consideration to the circumstances of the invited guests.

It will probably horrify some people on here but when my wife and I got married, we provided a field (with conveniences) for guests to camp in, if they wished. It turned out to be a very popular option with some guests staying several days and making a holiday out of it.

lazer

Gloomendoom wrote: »

Possibly. However, for us, it would also depend on where the wedding was. If it was somewhere where attending the wedding could be combined with a holiday in an an area or country we would not normally have visited, then we would be more likely to attend.

I strongly feel that, when a wedding is planned, it is the duty of the bride and groom to give due consideration to the circumstances of the invited guests.

It will probably horrify some people on here but when my wife and I got married, we provided a field (with conveniences) for guests to camp in, if they wished. It turned out to be a very popular option with some guests staying several days and making a holiday out of it.

I love the camping option!!