Would you pay to go to a wedding?

MrsE_2

Clueless969 wrote: »

There seems to be far too many folk on here that are taking the comments personally - I'm reasonably sure that none of the comments are aimed at anyone specific but are just folk speaking from personal feelings and experience.

Personally, as I've already hinted, I need a very good reason to attend anyone's wedding. If any of my children decided to get married in their "overseas dream location", they would be doing it without me. Yes, I do love my children but picking an "overseas dream location" and expecting even one's nearest and dearest to turn up because you've decided that's what you want is, as far as I am concerned, 100% selfish.

The presumption that anyone's family members might have the time to spare or a large sum of money to spend on a holiday that happens to coincide with the "happy day" is unreasonable.

Again personally, there is no way that I would attend any wedding that was out of my financial reach as I would not, even for my children, go into debt just to be there for their happy day. I would also like to think that my children would be more considerate than to put their close family under that sort of pressure.

Just my personal tuppence worth.

I'm delighted. My financial gift wouldn't go far in the UK, but in Mexico it will easily cover a small wedding:D

Gloomendoom

lazer wrote: »

I love the camping option!!

It did help that the temperature was just shy of 30°C

POPPYOSCAR

You can only be put under pressure if you allow yourself to be.

Torry_Quine

POPPYOSCAR wrote: »

People should be free to marry where and when they want. If that means going abroad that is their choice, so long as they are understanding when the invitations are declined.

When we were told that a wedding was going to be abroad we said straight away that we would not be going and it was not a problem.
I was quite glad really as I usually find weddings to be a chore rather than an enjoyable time anyway.

I agree but the problem is often that you can be told it's x months away so you have plenty time to save and be annoyed when you still don't want to go.

lazer wrote: »

What if the reason for an oversee's wedding is that it is where the bride or groom is from - would that change peoples feelings about going to an oversea's wedding?

It's certainly very understandable then but personally I still wouldn't be going. It would still be expensive and use up holiday time.

POPPYOSCAR

Torry_Quine wrote: »

I agree but the problem is often that you can be told it's x months away so you have plenty time to save and be annoyed when you still don't want to go.



It's certainly very understandable then but personally I still wouldn't be going. It would still be expensive and use up holiday time.

Let them be annoyed, their problem not yours.

Clueless969

POPPYOSCAR wrote: »

You can only be put under pressure if you allow yourself to be.

Hi - in theory, I totally agree with you but there is a big qualifier necessary.

We all know that water dripping on a rock will wear the rock away over time and the qualifier that I would offer parallels this. Family, expecially close family, are exceptionally good at dripping "watery" comments and suggestions on the rocks that form their family and not all rocks are created equal: some are most definitely harder than others.

POPPYOSCAR

Clueless969 wrote: »

Hi - in theory, I totally agree with you but there is a big qualifier necessary.

We all know that water dripping on a rock will wear the rock away over time and the qualifier that I would offer parallels this. Family, expecially close family, are exceptionally good at dripping "watery" comments and suggestions on the rocks that form their family and not all rocks are created equal: some are most definitely harder than others.

They need to toughen up then.

If they crumble under pressure they only have themselves to blame.

People especially families need to be more honest with each other IMO. If you bow to pressure you enable and validate selfish behaviour so you then cannot complain about it.

Erinnire

Depends who was asking, if it was family or a close friend it wouldn't really bother me too much and I would still go. If it was just an acquaintance then I would probably decline.

Clueless969

POPPYOSCAR wrote: »

They need to toughen up then.

If they crumble under pressure they only have themselves to blame.

People especially families need to be more honest with each other IMO. If you bow to pressure you enable and validate selfish behaviour so you then cannot complain about it.

OK, so neither you nor I crumble under such pressures but most people are human!!! :rotfl:They don't have our fortitude and so are far more susceptible to coercion. Would that it were otherwise but human nature is human nature and so that sort of strength is seldom close enough to the surface to be called into play.

Families are taught by society and too much of society's behaviour is based around the need to do what's necessary to get other people to do things that are good, bad or indifferent. The short version is that society teaches us to control others to achieve our aims. Again, not everyone is strong enough to fight that.

Emotional blackmail by one's nearest and dearest is amongst the most difficult things to resist.

Person_one

POPPYOSCAR wrote: »

You can only be put under pressure if you allow yourself to be.

No, you only succumb to pressure if you allow yourself to. You can definitely be put under it against your will!