Home educate?

shellsuit

ViolaLass wrote: »

Really? No days out to show her what she's studying e.g. a museum, seeing the effects of erosion, going to a place of historical interest etc? And no group work, no learning how to work well with others, how to get your point across effectively, how to make best use of the skills of others. She doesn't need any of that because her GCSEs are coming up?

Days out in a group where she would get her head put down a toilet I meant.

And No, she wouldn't need to visit those places. They don't visit those places in Years 10 and 11 in school, so why would she need to if she was home educated?

ViolaLass

shellsuit wrote: »

Days out in a group where she would get her head put down a toilet I meant.

And No, she wouldn't need to visit those places. They don't visit those places in Years 10 and 11 in school, so why would she need to if she was home educated?

She'd probably do some outing/field trip or other at school, and she would spend time doing group work, at least in my class she would.

"To be fair, if she's sitting quite a few GCSEs in Jan or June next year, she may need to focus on studying/ going through past papers/ working on exam technique, more than doing all the 'fun' learning that you would normally do with home ed.It can tend to take over your life for abit,sadly."

For a whole year? What a way to put a child off education. I'm a teacher and there's no way I would make my pupils spend all their lessons going through past papers/working on exam technique etc. There are other ways to learn.

mithras

Hi LTP, I would go with your gut instinct. You know your daughter best and she is still so very little. If you feel she isn't ready for nursery/ school then stick to your guns. School will always be there if your situation/ feelings change at a later date.

If you've joined Education Otherwise then you will be able to find home ed groups on their website running meet ups and activities in your area. There are lots of yahoo groups dedicated to exactly this sort of info. If you join the ones local to you you can start getting out and about in the home ed community and both you and your daughter can suss it all out for yourselves and decide whether it is for you. Meeting parents (and their kids) who are home edding face to face and can give you the practical pros and cons rather than imagined ones is invaluable and unless you are extremely rural the local home ed community could be larger than you'd think .

I have three children ages 8, 10, and 15. We've been home educating for over two years now and have never looked back. If you want more info then feel free to pm me, I am in the SE of England but may be able to point you in the right direction if you're looking for HE communities in your area .

LTP123

Poet123, you are right. It's not a bad trait, but in school it is!

GobbledyGook

My younger daughter hated playgroup. It was loud and boisterous and she just didn't like it at all. Whereas she has thrived in the more structured, calm environment of the school nursery and then school itself. She has come on leaps and bounds, whereas my friend has removed her child from school because she was the opposite.

Every child is different. In your shoes I'd try her in the nursery and see how she gets on with the new environment and then make a decision from there. Perhaps giving her time to see how she goes may bring yourself and your husband to the same conclusion either way as well.

FBaby

poet123 wrote: »

I really think that you are pre emting a problem that may not arise. Find a nursery which suits you and your child and let her go for one or two half days at first perhaps, and she will find her level. School is only compulsory from rising five, so you have some time to find the right school for her, that may mean moving or going private.

With respect, you sound as if you have deep seated issues which you are in danger of projecting onto your daughter. Those issues can do just as much damage (if not more so, as she is with you 24/7) as any issues at school could. Sensitivity is not necessarily a negative trait until it becomes the issue which precludes normal activities. School is pretty much the norm for everyone (although there are some good reasons to Home Ed) and until you have allowed your child to try it you will be doing her a disservice both in terms of emotional and educational development.

I totally agree with Poet. It sounds to me like you are preempting how your daughter will feel on the basis of your own personal experience. Even if your daughter is very similar to you, any two different schools could provide a very different environment, let alone schools through a different generation.

Assuming your daughter will struggle is already teaching her to avoid what she fears in case it MIGHT lead to a poor experience. This could have serious implication with her ability to face life. The best think you can do for your daughter is reassure her that you will always listen to her and look at solutions with her if she is unhappy.

Your daughter might very much surprise you. I've seen some extremely shy 3 years old turning out into confident school pupils.

poet123

LTP123 wrote: »

Poet123, you are right. It's not a bad trait, but in school it is!

And it could be in the workplace, in life. You cannot protect a child from everything and anything and you cannot protect until you know they definitely need protection.

I am afraid this is much more about you than your child.

kafkathecat

LTP you know your daughter better than anyone. Two weeks in nursery caused a huge amount of damage to my son's confidence and he was 10 before he could seriously consider going to school. But everyone is different. I know children who have gone to school for the first time at all ages up to 14 and most have settled in without problem.
I think what some people are getting at is they think that you are being over-protective. Only you know if that is true. I have known over-protective parents both in and out of school and agree that it is a problem but it is no more common in the home ed community. As long as you listen to your child and her needs you won't go far wrong. Whether you choose school or home ed either of you can change your mind at any time. Good Luck.

marrbett

ViolaLass wrote: »

She'd probably do some outing/field trip or other at school, and she would spend time doing group work, at least in my class she would.

"To be fair, if she's sitting quite a few GCSEs in Jan or June next year, she may need to focus on studying/ going through past papers/ working on exam technique, more than doing all the 'fun' learning that you would normally do with home ed.It can tend to take over your life for abit,sadly."

For a whole year? What a way to put a child off education. I'm a teacher and there's no way I would make my pupils spend all their lessons going through past papers/working on exam technique etc. There are other ways to learn.

Well, it all depends on many things, doesn't it- when she leaves school, if she's behind and has lots of the syllabus to study,when she takes the exams(if in Jan, then she doesn't have long), how many subjects she's taking etc. In my (albeit limited experience of doing exams from home), the last year when taking exams is a time when you get your head down and find out what the examiners need to know!! Nothing at all to do with real learning in my book!!There is time to do the hands on learning, but its not the priority, iyswim.

Anyway, sorry for getting distracted OP, this won't be of any help to you.x

pmlindyloo

LTP123 wrote: »

I've read back through all the home education posts but still feel like I need to post. My child is 3.5 years old and highly sensitive. She is due to start half day school nursery next Wednesday, I am petrified for her. She has attended a playgroup two days a week and never spoke a word whilst there.

I would like to home educate her and take her to different clubs for socialisation. She is a happy, funny, thoughtful child at home and I hate the thought of her thinking she just has to stick 2.5 hours a day out.

My husband, her father thinks she needs to go and will just learn to toughen up, why though?

Just for background, my husband wasn't looked after very well as a child and school was probably some respite from that. Me? Highly sensitive child and adult, in therapy currently for the torment I felt at school and allowed to happen to me again in the workplace. Obviously, that makes me a little unbalanced in my view, but I don't see why anyone should suffer just because that's life.

Sorry for the long post, I should add that my mother and father don't think she is emotionally ready to attend this year either. I am holding her back or doing my best for her?

First of all let's get this into perspective.

Compulsory school age is not until the term after the child reaches five years of age.

Most other countries do not even start school until the age of six.

I do not want to get into a debate about the pros and cons of this but as a retired teacher I hope you don't mind if I add a few words. (personal opinion only)

The education system is now obsessed by targets. Even very young children are assessed according to these. This makes the idea of children 'playing' whilst they are young almost a fallacy.

Although children at a young age are probably unaware of theses targets I personally feel that children in this kind of situation are not being allowed to develop according to their own individuality.

There will be children who thrive on interacting with other children and enjoy the hustle and bustle of the classroom/nursery but there will be others who will dislike it and feel overwhelmed by the whole experience.

Having said that, you recognise that your child is sensitive and having sent her to play group already realise the need to give her the opportunity to socialise and experience new situations. Also I think you understand that your own 'issues' may be having a negative effect on your daughter.

May I suggest another option?

Delay her entry into the more formal nursery education and continue with play groups, music groups, any similar activities which allow her to broaden her experiences.

You can go with her to most of these and for some activities try to leave her for a little while, extending the time when you feel happy.

I think at the moment your anxiety at her going to nursery is distressing you and probably her.

If you make the decision to delay formal education I think this might remove some of your anxiety. Then you can make plans to ensure that she has happy and positive experiences mixing with other children and adults in the lead up to infant school.

Enjoy this time with her but also enable her to develop socially with a happy and positive Mum to guide her towards 'letting go'.

Sorry, the few words turned into a rather long post