Sisters weddings abroad- To go at all costs?

MrsE_2

lolavix wrote: »

I also read it the same as pollycat. But at the end of the day, who cares? This post is not about you and you thinking someone had called your daughter selfish. (which I did not read it as). It an Internet forum and unfortunately people will interpret things in different ways.

She quite clearly did, the post below was quoting my post about whom my DD expected (as in anticipated) to attend.

I think thats unescessary seeing as she read the post totally out of the context it was written.

Yes expect does have different meanings, but in the context my post was clear.
She just wanted to "have a dig", which was silly. My DD doesn't expect (as in demand) anyone attend. Its something the inner family are happy with & thats all that matters.

Pollycat wrote: »

This is where I think it is wrong.

IMHO, nobody should be expected to fork out money they may not be able to afford to attend a wedding just because a bride & groom decide to get married abroad.

Should any of my close relatives decide to do that, I would hope that they wouldn't necessarily assume that I would automatically go - and I have 3 or 4 holidays a year.

Most people will probably think I'm selfish but I think it's the people getting married who are selfish if they expect people to attend, either because they are close family or close friends.

Maybe I'd feel differently if I was ever put in that situation though - but I would never traispe all the way to a Caribbean island as that's not my idea of a holiday.

Person_one

dw85 wrote: »

We didnt want a big thing here, we didnt (and couldnt afford the) £20k that a wedding is meant to cost plus f&f are based across the country (imagine the nightmares of logistics! )

You do know a wedding doesn't have to cost anything like that, don't you?

Just because a massive industry has sprung up around fleecing people getting married it doesn't mean its compulsory!

shellsuit

OP, why on earth did you lose money to do something your sister wanted you to do, when you are spending all that money on doing something she wants you to do in the first place?

I wouldn't have cancelled and I certainly wouldn't be told when to go piggin' home ~ that's just ludicrous! MY money pays for what 'I' want!

What do your parents have to say about her disgusting attitude, or does everyone tiptoe around her?

It's no suprise she acts in the way she does, if everyone panders to her.

Infact reading about her attitude and expecting a present still, I'd see if the holiday could be changed so I could go somewhere completely different altogether and I wouldn't have anything to do with her again if that's how she treated me.

melanzana

Sorry but I think the op is a windup!

Thre ARE Bridezillas out there, but to pander to all their whims and orders is just totally ridiculous..

Get a life.

dw85

Person_one wrote: »

You do know a wedding doesn't have to cost anything like that, don't you?

Just because a massive industry has sprung up around fleecing people getting married it doesn't mean its compulsory!

haha yeah, i know. But it is ridiculous what people will spend on one day and it feels like the whole industry is out to part you from hard earned cash!
For our budget, we can get more of what we want by going abroad.
(swim up bar anyone? :beer:)
plus i couldnt wait 2 years or whatever to tie the knot!

joess

Getting_by wrote: »

My sister announced last year that she was going to have a small intimate wedding abroad. It happened that both the location (Antigua) and the hotel (a sandals resort) she chose were quite expensive.

Does your sister realise that weddings at any Sandals hotels are like conveyor belts? I attended a wedding at Sandals a few years back at the Sandals Antigua (we stayed at Rex resorts Halcyon Cove as it was much cheaper!)

The day my friend had her wedding we bought day passes (about $40-$50 each if I remember rightly).

Her intimate wedding was actually one of 16 held on that day and the 'exclusive restaurant' she booked for her after ceremony meal was also occupied by 5 other brides!

melanzana

I'm not sure which sibling to be more gobsmacked at...

The Bride or the other one!

Both are ridiculous....IF the story is true that is.

spamhater

melanzana wrote: »

Sorry but I think the op is a windup!

Thre ARE Bridezillas out there, but to pander to all their whims and orders is just totally ridiculous..

Get a life.

My thoughts exactly. And if it isn't then the OP has nobody to blame but herself. She has been utterly spineless and rolled over to her sister's demands at every opportunity so until she learns to grow up and take responsibility for her own actions she will continue to invite this kind of behaviour.

Some people prefer to be martyrs about this kind of thing and how much it cost them than to just say "sorry, I can't make it". Turning down the request doesn't give them the same chance to whine about how hard done by they are.