Would this annoy you?

londonsurrey

Cherry_Bomb wrote: »

I don't go out of my way to buy cheap looking presents in the hope the recipient is aware of the true value.

I would hope not too. Although although I don't indulge in buying a cheap looking presents deliberately or otherwise, so I'm not too sure this whole area.

I'm going out now, so I'll bring back some sunshine to those of you stuck indoors!

NewKittenHelp

peachyprice wrote: »

Of course there are. There are those who think out of courtesy the girl should have at least told OP she didn't want the tickets (I don't suppose for one minute OP would have taken them back, that isn't what this is about) and then there are those without decent manners, like you, who don't think OP desereved that courtesy.

How dare you. Where have I said that she didn't deserve the courtesy? If you consider people who don't give with the proper spirit of giving as having decent manners, then I'm glad I don't have the manners you deem as decent.

Cherry_Bomb

Mojisola wrote: »

It sounds as if she realised the tickets would cost more than her usual present.

Perhaps she did. But reacting in a perfectly normal (and polite) way to the offer of a gift ie really? Are you sure? but isn't it expensive? Does not automatically mean goddaughter is aware of previous costs.

Bexm

Could not read and run on this one!
I'd be livid! How dare she sell them on.. without even saying a word to you! grrrrr.. I'm annoyed at just reading your post!

Desperado99

I'd be mad, and there wouldn't be anymore really expensive gifts coming her way.

I've just asked my daughter (aged 11) what she thought about it too, and she thought it was 'really bad' so age doesn't come into it.

aliasojo

Desperado99 wrote: »

I've just asked my daughter (aged 11) what she thought about it too, and she thought it was 'really bad' so age doesn't come into it.

With respect, that's a bit daft. You can't say all young people would think the same just because your 11 year old thought a certain way.

Desperado99

aliasojo wrote: »

With respect, that's a bit daft. You can't say all young people would think the same just because your 11 year old thought a certain way.

No, I see your point, but in the same way, not all young people would be so insensitive to cash in a gift without at least asking..... So blaming her actions on her age, either way, just doesn't wash

sulkisu

Again, thank you all for your replies. I did explain in my second post, but for those that missed it, this was not a case where I simply said 'I'm buying you tickets for your birthday, pick a show'.
I asked her what she was doing for her birthday - her 18th birthday the previous year had been a bit of a let down. She said that she really wanted to do something special, that if she could do anything it would be to see a West End show, but there's no way she could afford it. We talked for a while and I said that if she was sure that was what she wanted, I would get tickets for her birthday. She said are you sure, they can be so expensive, etc etc. I said it's fine, think about it and let me know. She called a few days later and said that if I was sure about it, then she would love to see Chicago but she would understand if I had changed my mind, especially as it ends soon and tickets would be really hard to come by. I said of course I haven't changed my mind, I'll see what I can do. I managed to get the tickets and gave them to her a few days later. She pretty much took them and cashed them in straight away.

We did speak and I did ask her why she had suddenly changed her mind about the show. Her response was that she still wanted to see the show, but then she thought of all of the things that she could spend the money on and so cashed them in instead. I said 'such as..?' and she replied 'I got a CD, some make-up, you know...just stuff'.

On the one hand, it was her gift to do what she wanted with but on the other hand, I just feel played.

suki1001

The problem is, we don't know why she did it, we're just assuming she'd rude because of her reaction. Because the op hasn't asked her why she's done she doesn't know.

We don't know how far away she lives from the west end. Although the GD has saved herself a lot of money from the cost of the tickets, we don't actually know how much it would cost to get there and all the other expenses envolved. Perhaps when the GD said yes, maybe they thought travel would be included because money's tight. It's not just the cost of tickets that's expensive

Perhaps she assumed Godmother would be taking her and wasn't expecting to be just handed the tickets and fork out for the other expenses. I know if we travelled to london (2.5 hours away), some tickets are very expensive if there isn't enough time to get the cheaper ones.

If there was a problem, perhaps she was embarassed about explaining it to the GM. "I'm sorry we now can't go because we can't afford the travel." It then put's an expectation on the GD to pay for travel. The list is endless, but we really don't know why she couldn't go. If she couldn't afford to go, saying she spent the money on cd's stops the expectation of the GM to pay for the travel - or stops her from feeling awful for not automatically offering to pay for the travel.

Maybe they didn't realise it was going to be in the West End, maybe they thought it was going to be closer to home.

My guess is that if she was so enthusiastic, maybe there was something that stopped her from going, maybe she was devastated she couldn't go, but maybe she (or the mother) couldn't bring herself to tell her the real reason she couldn't go. I would find it extremely difficult to admit i couldn't go to something in that situation, because of the pressure it puts on the other person.

Of course if you live very close to London then perhaps it's a different story, but how far out are you op.

tea_lover

It sounds like there was a lot of in-depth discussion about it before the tickets were bought and she knew exactly what was being paid for and where it was.