watching a friend die

worried_jim

Just got back from the hospital and I am pleased to say that he has improved. He has gained a kilo in weight (although is still being fed by a tube in his nose) in the three weeks he has been in there.
He was a lot more alert and his voice was sharper. They still don't know what is wrong with him and have recently performed some kind of fluid removal from his spinal cord (can't remember the medical term).

I took my ipod and small speaker and played classical music whilst reading him stories from the Daily Mail and describing the Olympic opening ceremony.

I can't describe how relived I am to see that things have improved, although I can't see a time when he will make it back to his own home.

belfastgirl23

Hurrah! Thanks for letting us know

meritaten

Thanks for the update - I am glad the old guy is improving. I bet he was pleased to see you!

Gingernutty

worried_jim wrote: »

They still don't know what is wrong with him and have recently performed some kind of fluid removal from his spinal cord (can't remember the medical term).

It's called a lumbar puncture - it's for diagnostic purposes. They'll test the fluid to see if there are any buggy, chemical or metabolic nasties that could be causing his symptoms.

Glad to read he's doing better, hope you're okay too.

worried_jim

Gingernutty wrote: »

It's called a lumbar puncture - it's for diagnostic purposes. They'll test the fluid to see if there are any buggy, chemical or metabolic nasties that could be causing his symptoms.

Glad to read he's doing better, hope you're okay too.

lumbar puncture- That's the one! Said it was pain on a whole new level, I believe it is to check for MS.

When I entered the room I held my breath not knowing what to expect but he responded straight away and was really happy to see me- just seeing this made me feel better.

He is still receiving excellent care and enjoys the company of all the female nurses. I've told all the neighbours that he has improved and I got a text from his daughter yesterday to say that he had improved (she didn't know that I had just got back) and her text mirrored my observations and thoughts so it seems everyone is now on the same song sheet.

Mayflower10cat

I'm so pleased to read your update.

And just wanted to add - if I'm lucky enough to have a friend as thoughtful as you when I'm 84, I'll be rich indeed.

NickyBat

Glad things are going in the right direction.

troubleinparadise

Dear Worried Jim,

My mum was dismissed as a hypochondriac, by doctors and family members alike.

She was actually very unwell with a degenerative neurological problem, but she was also desperately lonely and lacking in companionship as a widow. Her health problems didn't help with her socialising, or being able to manage as she changed on a daily basis, and felt unwell more often than not.

She did have a very few good friends who kept up contact with her.

Whatever the true story behind your neighbour friend, you have been a very good friend to him, and you will probably never realise just how much you have enhanced his life. Whether he could make more effort about himself who knows - but he is in his 80's - he deserves being looked after and indulged a bit! But perhaps a pity that the family can't see that....

loulou123

Things like this always bring out the worst in families (my own included) and as I work in a elderly care home, I see it a lot.

Families who never come in to see their relatives, start appearing when they get near the end - we've even had family members arguing over the will of a person who was dying (but still alive at that point) in the same room!

You sound like a lovely person, and if I was you I'd carry on exactly how you have been. But would also advise you don't get involved in the family politics any more then necessary.

Old people do frequently give up, but hopefully this is not the case and your friend continues to improve.

worried_jim

I had another visit on Monday and the Dr's are concerned that he is pulling his feeding tube out during his sleep so are going to put direct into his stomach. He hasn't put any more weight on and although he has improved since my first visit there is no progress or weight gain this time.
He was watching the Olympics on the tv when I got there but he is not very happy. He asked us to get some shopping for him and a neighbour and I went into his house to get some requested items and his money has gone.
I had stashed his cash in a safe place and the item had been moved and there was no money in it. My neighbour and I have decided not to tell him, I think he has told someone where it is and they have used it to buy him some previous items and thee in none left- I don't think it has simply been taken but now my neighbour and I are debating on whether to tell him or not.