MSE Pregnancy Club 25

savageHK

zcrat41 wrote: »

Morocha Interesting to hear you're going to not have dh with you. I know dh would rather avoid it if he could. It's our first and I just know we're going to have problems in the bedroom dept afterwards if he sees what he's going to see.

If he's going to raise your stress levels (hormonally, medically speaking!), it might be worth discussing whether or not you want him there as I think it can make your labour more difficult as you will feed off his nerves. Perhaps having him close by but not in the room if your hospital can do that, and call him in if you need the support?
As for the bedroom problems, is that just that you think he might be worried of causing you the pain again or won't like what he's seeing happen to your lady bits? I'm certainly not going to let OH see what's going on down the business end. I've also sort of decided not to let him know too much what's possible to go wrong (as then he'll sit there worrying!) and just tell him the basics like 'if x happens then I want y to happen and the medical staff might need to do z' without going into gory detail. I would like someone there ready to fight my corner in case things do go wrong (and I'm in no state to do it myself).
He's got a daddy natal class coming up at the Baby Show this Friday which covers what men do during birth so my cunning plan might be derailed though!

emweaver

MummyOfTwo wrote: »

at 37+1 with my third baby, im bloody terrified! Midwife just called to deliver all my homebirth drugs to keep in the fridge... its all a bit real...

big big hugs wish I was brave enough to deliver at home x

I am really hoping today is not my day as I feel rough like ive got the flu coming

dizziblonde

morocha wrote: »

hi lovely pregnant ladies !!...

We will have more babies soon, eh ?

I think i am the only odd one here, i don't want my OH in the ward or anywhere close to me during my labour and delivery. This is our second baby, and he was trully awfull the first time around, my MIL was there, and instead of helping me, she was helping him ! lol.. he hates hospitals... And they all laugh now, cos all what i wanted to do, was to be in oneside of the room, bouncing in my ball, very quite, no talking... just coping on my own way. I didnt even want back massages...
DH was relieved when i told him i dont want him there, and MIL said she would be delighted to be there if i want... i mean, shes like my second mum, a very calm person, just to get her to get me the nurse, or some drink/magazines... i think i will have her there, although i wouldnt mind to be on my own.

My husband sat there in the corner of the room playing on his mobile phone. Gave me one quick rub up and down of my back and then complained his arm was hurting, sat there and let the staff behave appallingly toward me - I've still not fully forgiven him now and he's been firmly read the riot act with that I expect him to assert himself to protect me this time, question when they're bullying me into things (don't want to scare people - there were specific circumstances which led to all of this and one, I now realise, notoriously cruddy hospital) and generally be a bit of the protective caveman character... or I'll effing kill him. If I HAVE to, and I really don't want to, I'll bring my mum in on the act who WILL get answers and better treatment for me (the fact she's an ex investigative journalist can be useful at times) - but she's crap at the fluffy sympathetic side so I really don't want to. My MIL arrived mid-delivery last time, drove me up the wall telling me to push and I ended up kicking her out of the room cos she was bugging me so much!

He did survive seeing a bucket of shredded placenta carried past him in the theatre without any problems in the bedroom department afterwards though!

I have no intention of going to any ante-natal classes whatsoever. All the NHS ones succeeded in doing was to make me feel like crud when I couldn't breastfeed, and make me flip out in terror when they mentioned having to do a forceps delivery - after they'd had the lovely "pass all the equipment around so we can amuse ourselves at the looks of horror on the women's faces" session... and I've got my own issues with the NCT demographic around here.

Rups32

ohh i didnt think of the fact that the hubbies and partners see all and things may change in the bedroom. eek!

emweaver

From experience it doesn't change things in the bedroom and it will take you a while to feel upto sex again.

KatyLiz

Usually partners wouldn't have to see too much. If they stay holding your hand and giving moral support there is no need for them to look down there. My poor DH had to though with our daughter as the MWs had abandoned us and he was the only one in the room. He was horrified poor thing, but he did manage to get over it pretty quickly

I couldn't have done it first time round without DH, I was in labour for hours and hours and I would have gone crazy on my own. Plus I need him telling me everything will be ok when I start to panic! With my son he wasn't as much use as he went dizzy and nearly fainted, and had to go sit in the corner by himself for an hour. I was still glad of his presence though!

Rups32

ah bless. Normally DH is ok and with it and can tell people off if needs be so better i have him in there as he has already told me he would like to have some authority to tell any midwives etc off. he is sometimes way too practical. where i would need him to hol dmy hand, he would prob be busy telling someone off. lol

emweaver

I wish my dh would tell the midwives off, I was in tears first time around telling the midwife I didnt want the trainee in there begging her to make her leave but she ignored me and DH just stood there. I asked him about 5 times to go and get another midwife to examine me before he actually did. He doesn't like confrontation.

twinklie

emweaver, they said I didn't have an infection last time, so hoping I still don't.

My DH is awesome. He knows exactly what I need and when I need it. He's very polite and lovely when he needs to be, but WILL push and fight our corner if necessary. He was lovely this morning and rubbed in all my moisturiser for me and kept kissing my bump. Was lovely. Got a little massage thrown in as well.

*Twinkle*

ellionic wrote: »

I have seen there are a couple of other mums to be who are rhesus negative like me, I have heard things have changed since I had my daughter nearly 9 years ago and will I will only be needing one injection this time around instead of the two I needed then. I also have the joy of going for a GTT soon which I am not looking forward to one bit, my son has type 1 diabetes with no family history on either side and they are still insisting i have it done I was ill last time
Well i will shut up for now, Good Luck to everyone at the top of the list xxx

Hi, i'm 32wks today and i'm Rh neg too and i've already had 2 lots of anti d and will have another straight after the birth, this is baby number 4 for me, i had the GTT last time, but not this time, i also am mum to a child with Type 1 Diabetes, no family history of it either