Curfew for a 17 year old

Proc

As long as he's responsible and not getting in trouble let him come and go as he pleases.

I was living alone at 16 but I'd built up responsibility at a younger age by proving I could do things like stay out late and not be a tit.

jellyhead

BitterAndTwisted wrote: »

That poor lad, the very thought of him abandoned like that is making me want to cry.

Me too An 18 year old babysitter is better than nothing I suppose, but not if he's not shopping and cooking ... what is the 16 year old doing about education?

alex21

He is on summer holidays. The schools here finish at the end of June. He has finished 5th form gcses and Ds tells me he has enrolled at local college to start a music course in September when term begins again. From what I can gather, he is not unhappy but my son says that is because he really is not aware of the seriousness / sadness of the situation. It seems awful to my son but he is used to a parent who is very involved in his life and knows everything that is going on in it (as you will gather from my earlier posts!!!) It seems awful to me as well but perhaps I should just keep a discreet ear and eye open and not go charging in. Is it my business?

BitterAndTwisted

Well, if everybody decided it was none of their business how or where would he get any help if he needed some? I've never known that many 18 year olds who were good in a crisis. Sounds like he could do with a cleaner so he doesn't go down with something like bubonic plague before September. What would sorry me most is that a 16 year old in a house all on his own, if he's not savvy, could be ripe for exploitation. Perhaps it's already become the local "party-house", who knows?

jellyhead

alex21 wrote: »

He is on summer holidays. The schools here finish at the end of June. He has finished 5th form gcses and Ds tells me he has enrolled at local college to start a music course in September when term begins again. From what I can gather, he is not unhappy but my son says that is because he really is not aware of the seriousness / sadness of the situation. It seems awful to my son but he is used to a parent who is very involved in his life and knows everything that is going on in it (as you will gather from my earlier posts!!!) It seems awful to me as well but perhaps I should just keep a discreet ear and eye open and not go charging in. Is it my business?

It's difficult to know, isn't it? Does he live near you? Maybe you could invite him round for lunch every Sunday? That way you could keep an eye on him, and maybe do a bag of washing for him while he's there if he needs it.

If he's just finished his GCSEs that means he's in the same school year as mine, and although mine was only 16 this week so is probably younger than this boy the age he is seems ever so young! I can't imagine my 'baby' without a parent for long periods, mind you mine is the type who would lose his head if it wasn't screwed on.

alex21

BitterAndTwisted wrote: »

Well, if everybody decided it was none of their business how or where would he get any help if he needed some? I've never known that many 18 year olds who were good in a crisis. Sounds like he could do with a cleaner so he doesn't go down with something like bubonic plague before September. What would sorry me most is that a 16 year old in a house all on his own, if he's not savvy, could be ripe for exploitation. Perhaps it's already become the local "party-house", who knows?

Well ds said he felt like starting to clean so that tells me all I need to know about the state of the house! I have told him to bring the lad round for dinner on Sunday.

miss_hh

I think it depends if he has just turned 17 or is 17 nearly 18.
My daughter is 16 and has a 11pm curfew. I will prob increase this to 12 when she reaches 17.

JodyBPM

At 17, I had to be home by 11pm, or ring (by 10ish preferably, but better to ring at 10.59 than not at all) to say I would be late, so that my parents wouldn't worry. So it wasn't a curfew as such (because if I rang to say I would be late that would be my decision, but I ALWAYS had to give an absolute time I'd be home by, and let them know if I was going to be even a minute late), more being considerate to my parents who naturally wanted to know I was OK. This was weekend nights or holiday nights - I didn't generally go out on school nights.

alex21

I just felt like updating on the situation with the 'abandoned' 16 year old one year on and thank those who responded for their input. The parents did return a few weeks later. Sadly I just found out tonight that the young lad is in hospital after taking an overdose. I feel terribly sad for him and cannot imagine how his parents must be feeling.

CKhalvashi

carolan78 wrote: »

My curfew pretty much went out of the window at 17 but like another poster I had to let my parents know where I was going.

I did, too, although I was 17 when I went to Uni, so that quickly stopped.

CK