Self Respect vs Responsibility

POPPYOSCAR

Person_one wrote: »

Fair enough, there are loads and loads of people whose opinions I believe to be less valid than mine.

The world changes when people who feel strongly about something take action to make it happen, there are many people in the world who have a lot of influence over the lives of others and personally, I think its important to stand up and be counted sometimes and say 'No, I don't agree with that, its wrong.'

Very small example, today as I was leaving work I noticed that there was a dog in the car next to mine. Its been a hot day, despite the occasional rain and that dog was possibly at risk. The person who left the dog in the car was probably of the opinion that it was fine to do that, but my opinion that it was risky was more valid so I called security to deal with the situation, they agreed with my opinion too!

For some reason there's a growing idea that every opinion must be equally respected and all opinions are equally valid, that's just not true.

I think there is a big difference of imposing your opinion on someone, demanding that they should think the same way as you and intervening in a situation to help a person/animal from suffering.

Gingernutty

There will always be a section of society who are happy to take advantage......

.....of the elderly, of children, of the demented, the mentally ill, the drugged, the drunk, the crippled, dumb animals, an unlocked door or window and so on.

It's bad enough when you are disabled, but make yourself vulnerable by getting so howling drunk you can't remember where you are and no 'decent' cab will take you, in clothing that's physically awkward to move around in and yes, there will be predators who will hone in.

Those that say the gropers and the rapists are two different types...er no. They're not.

A lot of rapists have escalated from petty 'groping' and inappropriate language through to more serious sexual assaults. It's a sliding scale from the pathetic and aging Lotharios who in an earlier post started the evening leering at and then tried to take advantage of a drunken underage girl to the the huntsman who tried to make a jury believe that the woman he raped consented because she didn't say no.

These men 'appreciate' women, they 'admire' women and are happy to 'show their appreciation' with a 'friendly touch', 'risque double entendre' and who's to say no when the 'package' is on offer?

The horrifying statistics are mindblowingly simple - most victims (rape, battery or murder) are know to their assailants - that's across every race and sex.

Stranger crimes are, thankfully, still quite rare which is why they are such big news when they occur.

We need to work on the self esteem of our young women, raise their expectations, tell them that they are more than a pretty package, that they have the right for their opinions to be heard and to be respected.

Young men need to be shown that increasingly available hard core pornography is, effectively fiction - not every girl gets 'turned on' by being forced and that real life is about respect and empathy.

It's an increasingly harsh and horrible, plastic, insincere and pushy world out there. It's the objectfiying of increasingly younger girls and women, the 'tits out' glamour on display in every magazine, newspaper and website that has increasing numbers of young men on the pull and an increasing number of young girls and women thinking that it's okay to 'persuade' a girl or force her to have sex.

Or face ridicule, insults that she's frigid or lies that she's 'easy'.

It's easy to say to just ignore it, but how? ONce upon a time it was a big deal to tie up the family 'phone with a call, now a lot of young people not only have a 'phone, they have web access, FaceBook, Twitter, MySpace, some schools have their own websites with poor patrolled forums....the abuse, pressure, bullying and harrassment can be a 24/7 experience.

Person_one

aliasojo wrote: »

And don't we know it. :rotfl:

Fair cop.

There will be lots of things where you strongly feel your opinion is more valid than others as well though, the idea that all opinions are equal is tosh, really.

POPPYOSCAR

Person_one wrote: »

Fair cop.

There will be lots of things where you strongly feel your opinion is more valid than others as well though, the idea that all opinions are equal is tosh, really.

When I come across such an attitude as you should think what I think because I am right, that is when I totally switch off. I am more likely to engage with someone by gently persuasion.

Person_one

POPPYOSCAR wrote: »

When I come across such an attitude as you should think what I think because I am right, that is when I totally switch off. I am more likely to engage with someone by gently persuasion.

I don't think I've ever said that, I try to put forward a slightly more cogent argument generally!

We've now moved on slightly to a discussion of the validity of various opinions, that's all.

poet123

Person_one wrote: »

Fair cop.

There will be lots of things where you strongly feel your opinion is more valid than others as well though, the idea that all opinions are equal is tosh, really.

Ok, let me put you on the spot. I have had four children, do you think your opinion on feeding and childbirth is equally as valid as mine?

Person_one

poet123 wrote: »

Ok, let me put you on the spot. I have had four children, do you think your opinion on feeding and childbirth is equally as valid as mine?

I don't think you're quite understanding my point. Its not a direct competition.

For example I believe hitting children is wrong, so if you had four children but hit them, then yes I'd think my opinion on that one point was more valid.

However I believe your opinion on the physical effects of sleep deprivation on your family life would be more valid, because only you know about that!

Its not that one person's opinion is objectively more or less valid, but that we obviously all believe in our own opinions, rightly or wrongly.

(I wanted to bold objectively but my computer won't let me highlight it.)

poet123

Person_one wrote: »

I don't think you're understanding my point.

Never mind.

I understand perfectly, I think that is the problem.

poet123

Person_one wrote: »

I don't think you're quite understanding my point. Its not a direct competition.

For example I believe hitting children is wrong, so if you had four children but hit them, then yes I'd think my opinion on that one point was more valid.

However your opinion on the physical effects of sleep deprivation on your family life would be more valid, because only you know about that!

Its not that one person's opinion is objectively more or less valid, but that we obviously all believe in our own opinions, rightly or wrongly.

You haven't answered the specific question.

You are now saying we all believe in our own opinions, which is true, but surely we can also strive for some objectivity and some realism?

If I have never driven a car I would be foolish to think my opinion on driving up the M6 was equal to that of a salesman who does that journey 4 times a week. It is not a sign of weakness to accept that others have experience which lends more weight to their opinion.

Person_one

poet123 wrote: »

You haven't answered the specific question.

You are now saying we all believe in our own opinions, which is true, but surely we can also strive for some objectivity and some realism?

If I have never driven a car I would be foolish to think my opinion on driving up the M6 was equal to that of a salesman who does that journey 4 times a week. It is not a sign of weakness to accept that others have experience which lends more weight to their opinion.

I did answer it, the answer is that it depends.

There are many many parents out there whose opinions on child raising I respect greatly, I can't possibly know from this forum if you are one of them.

There are also many parents who raise their children in a way I have absolutely no respect for, and I don't think the fact that they've done it means I automatically need to think their opinions (its ok to hit kids, having favourites, neglect, smoking near babies) are valid.

None of this has anything to do with what we were actually talking about though, you just don't like me and you want to catch me out.