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I'm at the end of my tether!!

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Comments

  • Scarlett1
    Scarlett1 Posts: 6,887 Forumite
    CCStar wrote: »
    Things have been sorted and we are going to look after his savings till he buys a house. I might put his allowance into the savings but not for him to access.

    He has moved out and looking for work.

    I feel I have had to be harsh but I have taken this crap for too long and it's not good for him either.

    My OH sorted it out earlier and even his mates were in support.

    Many thanks to you all for your support - it has really helped keep me strong:)

    Just need to get this place sold now!
    nice result CC, its for the best and your son will thank you in years to come when he is able to put a deposit down on his first house :)
  • Oldernotwiser
    Oldernotwiser Posts: 37,425 Forumite
    CCStar wrote: »
    I married at 17 to the same man and been together 25 years. Our son is 19.

    Yes they can start at 16 up here.

    He was born in February

    I hope that clears it up:D

    I still can't see how you could have been a single parent of a 19 year old son when you've been married for 25 years!
  • happiness_fairy
    happiness_fairy Posts: 46 Forumite
    Maybe there were probs after son was born. CC doesn't say that she has been a single parent for 19 years only that being a single parent was hard so she decided to stay with OH.

    Just because your married doesn't mean you can't be a single parent!

    I admit I thought some of the things CC said didn't add up but then thought well they've got 4 stars so maybe not a troll after all - just someone having a really crap day - it happens to the best of us after all.
    it's not having what you want - it's wanting what you've got
  • Horasio
    Horasio Posts: 6,676 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture Combo Breaker
    happiness_fairy wrote: »
    Maybe there were probs after son was born. CC doesn't say that she has been a single parent for 19 years only that being a single parent was hard so she decided to stay with OH.

    Just because your married doesn't mean you can't be a single parent!

    I admit I thought some of the things CC said didn't add up but then thought well they've got 4 stars so maybe not a troll after all - just someone having a really crap day - it happens to the best of us after all.

    What do u mean not adding up? I don't have to account my whole life story to you or anyone else.

    I am feeling ganged up on here today and I don't need it - it was a crap day and been crap for quite some time. Of course it's not 100% solved but a lot got sorted yesterday.

    I am not a troll but some newbies are acting like one - I am not a single parent and never been one - been married for 25 years but had a time apart when he worked in Scotland and we were down south.

    Remember the rules above - be nice to moneysavers and courtesy helps.

    I anyone else wants a pop at me whilst I am down - don't bother, I have got the ignore button to work now and you will be reported!
    An average day in my life:hello: :eek::mad: :coffee::coffee::coffee::T :o :rotfl: :rotfl: :p :eek::mad: :beer:
    I am no expert in property but have lived in many types of homes, in many locations and can only talk from experience.
  • tired_mum
    tired_mum Posts: 2,340 Forumite
    CCStar am really pleased things are a little more settled
    you are most definatly not a troll as i know you from another board
    I can see you have been up most of the night through worry Take no notice of those ignorant enough to go through things with a fine tooth comb
    you know who your friends are and we know you arent doing this for attention as those of us who have been married with kids and have had teenagers can all relate to this in one way or another
    take care
  • mishmash
    mishmash Posts: 371 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture Combo Breaker
    Your son is 19 he is an adult and while this situation is unfair on you it is not doing your son any favours in the long term, he needs to learn to take responsability for himself.

    You say he has time ( and I pressume money) for pleasure, are you giving him this money?

    I went to uni as a single mum of 3 and had to work as well, yes it was hard, but life is!

    Stop paying his petrol or any other money. I pressume he is living rent free with you. Work out what it would cost him for room and board if he lived indipendantly. Tell him and your O/H this ammount to evidence your point.

    Tell him while you were prepared to support him, but he is taking advantage of this, While you are not taking keep off him you should expect him to do some household chores to help out.Do not do his cooking, ceaning, washing or ironing.

    I have 14 year old twins, they both have after school jobs to earn a bit of extra money, and they get spends for doing household chores.While I of course love them and will support them, my job as a mum is to ensure that they can make their own way in the big wide world one day.
  • Horasio
    Horasio Posts: 6,676 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture Combo Breaker
    tired_mum wrote: »
    CCStar am really pleased things are a little more settled
    you are most definatly not a troll as i know you from another board
    I can see you have been up most of the night through worry Take no notice of those ignorant enough to go through things with a fine tooth comb
    you know who your friends are and we know you arent doing this for attention as those of us who have been married with kids and have had teenagers can all relate to this in one way or another
    take care

    Thank you for your support both with my problem and the trolls I have had to endure today.
    An average day in my life:hello: :eek::mad: :coffee::coffee::coffee::T :o :rotfl: :rotfl: :p :eek::mad: :beer:
    I am no expert in property but have lived in many types of homes, in many locations and can only talk from experience.
  • Horasio
    Horasio Posts: 6,676 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture Combo Breaker
    mishmash wrote: »
    Your son is 19 he is an adult and while this situation is unfair on you it is not doing your son any favours in the long term, he needs to learn to take responsability for himself.

    You say he has time ( and I pressume money) for pleasure, are you giving him this money?

    I went to uni as a single mum of 3 and had to work as well, yes it was hard, but life is!

    Stop paying his petrol or any other money. I pressume he is living rent free with you. Work out what it would cost him for room and board if he lived indipendantly. Tell him and your O/H this ammount to evidence your point.

    Tell him while you were prepared to support him, but he is taking advantage of this, While you are not taking keep off him you should expect him to do some household chores to help out.Do not do his cooking, ceaning, washing or ironing.

    I have 14 year old twins, they both have after school jobs to earn a bit of extra money, and they get spends for doing household chores.While I of course love them and will support them, my job as a mum is to ensure that they can make their own way in the big wide world one day.

    He has moved out of his own accord and living with mates for a low cost. He will have to look for work as the supply has been cut off from now.

    He had the chance to behave responsibly for months but kept ignoring us. He knew the score
    An average day in my life:hello: :eek::mad: :coffee::coffee::coffee::T :o :rotfl: :rotfl: :p :eek::mad: :beer:
    I am no expert in property but have lived in many types of homes, in many locations and can only talk from experience.
  • happiness_fairy
    happiness_fairy Posts: 46 Forumite
    Dear CC

    I am sorry that I upset you - I was trying to show you some moral support.

    I don't expect you to post your entire life history but was trying to show that sometimes relationships don't always work out as planned.

    I guess I could have chosen my words a little better - like I said I hadn't meant to upset you - please believe me when I say i'm really sorry.

    Glad things are looking up for you though - guess I heard you roar now!
    it's not having what you want - it's wanting what you've got
  • MATH
    MATH Posts: 2,941 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    CCstar is not a Troll but a long term poster on another board. A quick look back through her posts will show you that she is not an attention seeking drama queen (we have had a least one and yes I was taken in for a while:mad: ) but a regular poster who happens to being going through a grotty patch.

    To read through this one thread and post your judgement of her shows not only a lack of sympathy but a lack of intelligence.

    MATH
    Life's a beach! Take your shoes off and feel the sand between your toes.
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