partners phone never leaves his side

System

My phone never leaves my side as i dont have pockets in my clothes and i get a lot of phone calls/texts from the kids. If i put it down i can never find it again afterwards so its easier to carry it round the house with me.

I even take mine in the bathroom when i have a bath. I sleep with it on my bedside table too and thats when i charge it.

meer53

I discovered my ex's affair because of his refusal to leave his phone anywhere. My curiosity got the better of me and first chance i got, i looked at the last dialled call. He'd left it on charge in the kitchen. It was her. On Xmas day.

That was 10 years ago. OP, the only way you'll get rid of your suspicions is to have it out with him or it will drive you crazy. It could all be innocent. Hope it is

green1970

If the trust has been broken before, what has he done to reassure you and enable you to trust him again? Going through the same pattern of behaviour as before doesn't sound very promising in my opinion. I'd have to ask to see it to put my mind at rest given the history in your position and his answer would give me mine.

My husband will sometimes ask me 'who's that' if I'm getting/sending loads of texts and vice versa. We accept that we're both a bit nosy and either can see the other's phone if we ask, not that we do. There's no broken trust there though which makes it a bit different.

VestanPance

I have my phone with me at all times these days too. I think the fact modern smart phones give you access to so much that you can become dependent on them.

I take mine to the loo as well, read the Guardian on the bog in phone format. Only time I don't have my phone on me is when sleeping, showering or playing sports.

That said I don't think the issue here is what this guy does with his phone, but rather that there obviously is a huge trust issue in the relationship. One way or another that needs to be resolved or both your lives will end up hellish.

KiKi

maybebaybe wrote: »

...so maybe fingers crossed it is all normal...l

...or, you know, you could sit down and have an adult conversation with him about it.

It's probably a better idea than crossing your fingers and hoping for the best.

KiKi

NotSuchASmugMarriedNow

I'm sorry but I think your partner is being unfaithful.

The fact that he gets angry with you when you question him about his phone is a common reaction and designed to stop you from speaking about the matter any further.

And with regard to your "trust issues" ask yourself this. Have you always had trust issues or is this just something that your current partner said after you found out he had been texting another woman:(

You need to get that phone and see whats on it - you need absolute solid proof before you accuse him of anything because he will deny everything and then become even more careful and secretive and could carry on doing this for years.

Get evidence and then confront him. Is the phone passworded or not?

maybebaybe

NotSuchASmugMarriedNow wrote: »

I'm sorry but I think your partner is being unfaithful.

The fact that he gets angry with you when you question him about his phone is a common reaction and designed to stop you from speaking about the matter any further.

And with regard to your "trust issues" ask yourself this. Have you always had trust issues or is this just something that your current partner said after you found out he had been texting another woman:(

You need to get that phone and see whats on it - you need absolute solid proof before you accuse him of anything because he will deny everything and then become even more careful and secretive and could carry on doing this for years.

Get evidence and then confront him. Is the phone passworded or not?

No I never had trust issues before, never been cheated on so no reason !!

My trust issues only happened when I found out something about him and his ex a few months after we got together, which then led on to me thinking that this behaviour with his phone was maybe not normal after all !!

This played out when he admitted that he was secretly texting and calling another woman ( apparently just a friend ) after we talked when we got back together after splitting for a few weeks.

As far as know its not passworded, but seriously could not look at it even if I wanted to as it seriously never leaves his side !!

NotSuchASmugMarriedNow

Then you will have to look at it when he is asleep

maybebaybe

NotSuchASmugMarriedNow wrote: »

Then you will have to look at it when he is asleep

Again not possible its always by his side of the bed and always set to airplane mode at night ( whatever that is ) lol

FatVonD

It sounds dodgy to me. My husband is besotted with his new smartphone but he'll happily give it to me to put in my handbag at a gig or whatever. I'd never check it because I trust him but I *could* if I wanted to. I give him mine all the time because I don't know how to work it!

Given the history in your position I'd be worried too and re the phone being under your pillow, the only way it could have got there is if it slipped from under his pillow and that's definitely not normal behaviour. The only reason for it to be there rather than the bedside table is so you can't take it in the night without waking him up.