Husband has made me feel like nothing..

moneysaymoneydo

Not sure why previous post above thinks it funny he says you forced him to have s8x with you, tables turned you a man im sure they would not see it as a man throwing a tantrum, verbal abuse calling you fat smelly etc is totally unacceptable and also the bag of filth he just didnt have the time to rid of sorry but you need to get a grip why oh why do women settle for such scumbags is beyond me!!!

trevorsminted

Teenage boy act???? yeah my teenager was caught with po&& under his mattress but sorry bag of dodgy dirtay womens under garments no way that is a perver!!! No wonders your confidence is shattered and then he say he only sha&&ed you because you wouldnt take no for an answer god get out now or if you do stay accept you are on the slab for his taking once he has aroused himself with his holdall of tricks in the garage, sorry but you could be anyone including the ex.

If you do decide to stay with the perve maybe he will request you chuck some of the undies on and go through it together!!

Seriously think you are better leave or get rid you will feel so much better for it!!!

Emmzi

Why don't you believe that you deserve better?

kazwookie

Gingham_R wrote: »

I hope you can really hear what people are telling you here.

Your husband has a fetish. I'm sure there was all sorts of stuff in his chaotic, filthy old room, but why gather this all together? Why isn't it mixed in with old pizza boxes and tinnies for example?

He uses them, with the !!!!!!, to masturbate. Maybe he wears it, or holds it or maybe he sniffs it - maybe he wraps it round his neck or face.

He has not gathered up a holdall full of his ex's underwear, thrown in some !!!!!! mags then kept them in a garage for years. That's utterly ridiculous. He has a fetish. That's all.

Either that's something you can understand, learn to accept and/or become part of or it's not. That probably depends on whether or not he can man up and tell you the truth.

How he's treating YOU though is very different. He is being unkind to you and that issue is far removed from how he gets off on his own, frankly. I think you would probably benefit from talking to a counsellor to work out what you want to do about it.

What gingham has said. ^^

Get the bag today and chuck it out inc the magasines.

He has a fetish and has been caught out and is taking it out on you, and always will till you deal with it.

marisco_2

ihatethesenowiamone wrote: »

We have just had a bit of a shouting match and he has said some nasty things. Not the things i mentioned before....it is like when he is in a corner, he will just shut down and then when REALLY goaded, will lash out..... i know i shouldnt "go on" but i need answers etc i need to know he understands how i am hurting about this.... so i go on and on til he answers then he gets angry (think teen boy!) and says things that, when calm, he will say arent true and will say "of course i dont mean them" etc.....

I ashamed to admit it, but last night we had sex... and i thought he wanted it etc, though i was slightly worried that he was doing it as "make up for what i have done and thent things'll be fine" sex....... He has just said to me "you made me have sex last night".... he then said "when i said no, you talked me round" (neither true in my mind thats for sure!)

I feel pain at those words - and the worst part is, i never quite know if he is being hurtful and lashing out or just saying what he really honestly thinks

For your own sake OP start seeing all this for what it is. You are being emotionally abused hun. Your husband is playing mind games with you, cruel ones at that.

You wanting answers to what you have described on this thread is not 'going on and on' nor is it about goading him. If he feels backed into a corner it is because he has things he is hiding and feels guilty. Your husband sounds like a weak, inneffective bully who is lashing out and trying to deflect his failings onto you.

Don't put up with it, he will make your life a misery.

Seanymph

I think Emmzi is bang on - why do you have such little respect for yourself that you allow him to talk to you like that?

That's the area you should look at first to be honest. The rest is symptomatic of the low regard he holds you in because you do so yourself - start with self respect and the rest will work itself out.

luxor4t

minnie123 wrote: »

What does he do for a living if he works in peoples houses he could easily steal a pair of knickers or tights out of the washing basket......

:eek: next time we have workmen in, the laundry basket will be EMPTY!!!!!!

thegreenroom

Have you checked the sizes on the underware and also o. The tags there is usually a date code like aw11 or 0511

Lotus-eater

Well people have different levels of understanding about fetishes. Obviously he has one in some way, but then so do alot of people have alot of different fetishes.

That is a completely separate point to how he talks to and treats you.

I don't know how much you want to keep this relationship going, but I think you need a frank and honest talk. Don't act like Mary Whitehouse and accuse him of being a perve, just talk and say you want to find out what is going on, no matter what the truth is.
Stress that whatever it is, you can work it out together, but that you need to have a good relationship with each other.

I honestly don't think he will tell you and if he does, I'm not sure you are the understanding kind.

suki1001

It would really concern me where he was getting them from. I wouldn't dismiss it as just a fetish.