Would you be angry?

daska

Did the friend's mum actually go into the consultation with her and suggest she be put on the pill?

If she didn't, and if the GP listened to the symptoms and prescribed based on a professional opinion, I can't see that she did anything to be criticised for.

I also find the suggestion that mum alone has the prerogative to decide if, when and how periods are dealt with somewhat naive. Some mum's are useless at this sort of thing e.g my mum was ever so organised about it, except for the fact that she had never had a painful period so didn't believe that my sister was in agony - you could see she was, she was white as a sheet, throwing up and could barely move and mum wouldn't even give her an aspirin.

patchwork_cat

londonsurrey wrote: »

If the mother is making a scene about this, I suspect that she'd be the freaking type. The friend made a decision, albeit one that the mother seems to disagree with, but it is a reversible one.

If anything, the friend was very diligent. I would rather she was extra careful, and took her to the doctor, rather than making a decision that it was "just" a period, given that she doesn't know everything about the girl, and maybe denied her medical care and for something to happen, in which case it would be "All she had to do was take her to the doctor, for free. Why didn't she?"

The girl can come off the pill. She wasn't given a hysterectomy.

She is not making a scene, she told me about it and I was more cross than she was.

patchwork_cat

arbroath_lass wrote: »

Yes but people in agony don't "roll on the floor" do they? Perhaps the pain was worse this period or worse than Mum realised.

Well actually they do, but this was used as an expression in this case, don't be a pedant.

POPPYOSCAR

patchwork_cat wrote: »

Well actually they do, but this was used as an expression in this case, don't be a pedant.

Yes, you are right, they do. I have done so myself!!

Bad period pain runs in our family. My sister once fainted as she was getting on a train for work and the teachers at school used to ask me if I was ok because they said my face looked green!!

I have also had my daughter rolling about on the floor crying and in terrible pain and losing a lot of blood.It was making her very ill and she was having a lot of time away from school because of it.

She calls her Mefanamic tablets her 'magic' tablets as they have stopped all of this. So thankfully she has not had to go on the pill.

Had they not worked we would have considered the pill, but it would not be a decision my daughter would make on her own as she would have wanted my advice.

the_pink_panther_2

I think the mum had good intentions, perhaps overstepped the mark but she probably just didn't know what to do at that point in time and took her to the doctors thinking that this is what the mother would have wanted. The lady probably didn't know that the doctor was going to prescribe the pill. I understand frustrating for the girl's mum, but like I say I think it was a well intention-ed move by her friend.

meer53

I would have thought that the doctor would have had a bit more tact.

On the other hand, if i had taken my friends daughter to the doctors for this, there is no way that i would have come out of the surgery with a prescription for the pill ! I would have said, can we just have some strong painkillers for now please as my friend is away on holiday, and i'm not comfortable with this !

Chakani

So the friend took the girl to her GP, and the mother isn't angry about it? I don't really understand the problem, to be honest.

I wouldn't leave my children with anyone whose judgement I didn't trust, so I don't think I would be at all upset that they had taken her to the GP. I would probably think they had been overcautious, but that's understandable given that it's someone else's child.

The doctor prescribed the medication, not the friend. Presumably he or she had a discussion with the daughter, and they agreed to give it a try? It's not irreversible, like a depo injection, if there are any problems she can just stop taking it.

OP I do think you're overreacting somewhat.

kitschkitty

Wow there's an amazing amount of judgement going on in this thread, and with very little information to go on most of it is very unfair.

Most people have even considered/asked what the girls part/opinion in this was. We don't know if she is a mature 14 or an immature 14.

We don't know if the Dr asked her who she was with - I'm sure that must be a fairly decent percentage of 14 year olds these days who might be embarrassed to speak to the Dr with their mum there (and equally many who wouldn't want to go alone).

We don't know how bad her pain is and if having a day of school was valid, never mind the situation with the Dr.

We don't know if she's already tried various painkillers or not (and how effective they may have been -or not).

She may have asked to go to the Dr's, she may have asked the Dr for the pill. We simply don't know.

While there's nothing wrong with expressing how you feel about your own children's care if you & they were in this situation, it doesn't mean that what either of the 2 mother & the girl did/felt is wrong.

raven83

I got my periods very young and by the time i was 12 they were so heavy and painful i actually contemplated jumping out the window because i couldn't handle the pain. I went on the pill at 12 and it was the best thing i did, periods were very light and had hardly any pain, i could start enjoying my life again, only side affect was i put on weight, but that was a small price to pay. If it was my daughters then i would have no problem with them going on the pill if they turn out to be like me. If someone else took my child to the doctor though, it would depend on who it was, if it was one of my closest friends then i don't think i would have a problem with it, whereas if it was someone i didn't know too well then i probably would feel a bit miffed. Maybe the other mum had never had to deal with heavy periods before and was concerned for the girl, to me it sounds as if she was only trying to help, but then i could be wrong.

arbroath_lass

patchwork_cat wrote: »

Well actually they do, but this was used as an expression in this case, don't be a pedant.

Okay, well I never have despite being in a great deal of pain on at least one occasion.

I wasn't trying to be pedantic either. You seemed to be saying that it is obvious when someone is in pain and I disagree. That was all.

Perhaps it would help to think of it not as "the pill" but as medication to help a young woman that has the side effect of stopping her getting pregnant. Taking the pill will not make her have sex.

Are you going to answer the other questions?